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Already planning for how to survive in jail

⁨1302⁩ ⁨likes⁩

Submitted ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago⁩ by ⁨Lt_Worf@lemmy.ca⁩ to ⁨[deleted]⁩

https://lemmy.ca/pictrs/image/94413181-612f-4252-a427-5a0b00ce76f6.jpeg

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Comments

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  • AllonzeeLV@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    …As you pass by 5 people in self-checkout practicing tactical shoplifting.

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    • DragonTypeWyvern@literature.cafe ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Remember, if you see someone stealing food, no you didn’t.

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      • AllonzeeLV@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        Also Remember, stealing from publically traded corporations is stealing from sociopathic thieves.

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      • FarceMultiplier@lemmy.ca ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        Not just food. Any self care items or toiletries of any sort.

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      • _CottonCandyUnicorn_@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        Food? What food? I didn’t even know they had food…

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    • Ultraviolet@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      They factor it into their decision to use self checkout. If the increase in shoplifting is less than they save on staff reduction (it is, significantly so), they consider it a tradeoff, so it’s hard to call it unethical.

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  • RubiksIsocahedron@reddthat.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    That’s just how the capitalists want you to think - that you committed a crime by not giving capitalists money.

    The capitalists want you to think that all money is their money, and that you are committing a crime by getting in the way of their money.

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    • bananathan@lemm.ee ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      It’s a meme mate

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    • Treemaster099@pawb.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      I understand what you’re saying, but I don’t think that’s what the meme was meaning. I think it meant when you leave empty handed, it looks like you’re shoplifting. That makes you nervous and you start acting weird which makes you look even more suspicious and more nervous. Wash, rinse, and repeat till you get home and cry because social situations are awkward and hard and life would be so much easier if I was alone on a deserted island like Tom Hanks in that one movie.

      … I might’ve lost track towards the end, but you get the idea.

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  • khannie@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Walking through customs at the airport

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    • DankOfAmerica@reddthat.com ⁨3⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Going to Latin America: What if they planted some shit to blackmail me? Do I have enough cash? Will the US save me if I’m in prison here?

      Customs agent: [Paper]? looks at it with an attitude and waves me thru

      Returning to US: Shit. Did I leave that guava in my backpack? What if sugar is contraband? What if the rum was laced but I didn’t know? What if the tobacco has tobacco bugs in it? What if the limits on alcohol and tobacco are per year, and the last time I came back into the country counts for this year and now everything I’m bringing is in excess of the limit?

      Customs agent: thinks this guy is such an anxious mess Welcome back! 🙂

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    • menemen@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Much more understandable though. Even without anything to declare, the “please come here” can mean that you’ll lose the next 20 minutes looking at your dirty underwear with a stranger, while you are probably already kinda stressed from the travel.

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      • VikingHippie@lemmy.wtf ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        20 minutes looking at your dirty underwear with a stranger

        Some people pay good money for that, you know!

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  • ThrowawayPermanente@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Why do you hate the econony, Kermit?

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  • pikasaurX4@lemm.ee ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    One time I got trapped in a store because the door was behind the counter where the register was and a guy was sitting there the whole time. I decided not to buy anything, but I looked around for a while so I felt like he might question me. So I just kept pretending to look around which made it even more awkward to leave empty handed.

    I think I decided not to buy anything after 20 minutes but spent a whole hour in there trying to figure out how to leave

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    • _CottonCandyUnicorn_@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Man I’ve done this before but maybe spent 15 minutes and that felt like an hour. A whole hour must have felt like a whole day.

      My problem is that I AM buying something but I stand there analyzing all the options just walk out with 1 thing. As I’m checking out I start to wonder if anybody realized that I’ve just spent 15 minutes standing at one shelf to end up buying 1 bottle of infant cough syrup.

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  • HawlSera@lemm.ee ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Generalized Anxiety Disorder is a bitch

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    • DankOfAmerica@reddthat.com ⁨3⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      What if it’s not generalized anxiety disorder?? What if it’s something worse??

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      • HawlSera@lemm.ee ⁨3⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        You can’t do this to me

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  • Saneless@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    When I shop without a cart or basket, the mental energy it takes to not put something in my pocket so I can hold things better is a lot more than 0

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    • Agent641@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      I regularly put stuff in my pockets while im browsing. Sometimes I even pay for it.

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    • PreventFalls@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      I accidentally put a product in my purse at Walgreens to get my phone out, and within 5 seconds an overhead page went off saying “code zero, code zero”. I quickly grabbed the product back out and half yelled “omg I’m sorry!” before going to the register to pay for it and also mumbling to the cashier who probably gave no fucks that I was sorry, it was very much an accident.

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  • SocialMediaRefugee@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    I always feel bad when I leave a small shop without buying anything, like I’m abandoning them.

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    • Mdotaut801@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      They’re used to it when it’s the same shop as the one 3 doors down selling the same trinkets and crystals.

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  • AffineConnection@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    I have obsessive guilt about silly things, but even I cannot comprehend why people would feel guilty about simply not buying something at a store.

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    • ivanafterall@kbin.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      It might look like you stole something. And the more you think that as you walk out the door, the more you start to look like you stole something.

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      • paddirn@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        It’s a consequence of our capitalist society, of how we’re not allowed to just exist in most places without buying or consuming something. About the only places we have left are sidewalks, public parks, libraries, maybe a large mall. Anywhere else and you can potentially be asked to leave if you’re not seen “doing” something or at least looking like you’re going to buy something after awhile. If the staff don’t care, you can “get away with it” (that is, get away with just existing), but more often than not you may be asked to leave. I’d try to test the theory out by just standing around for a few hours, but who actually has that kind of time?

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      • happyhippo@feddit.it ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        And for me the feeling is inversely proportional to the time spent there.

        I’m looking for something very specific, they don’t have it, I leave. But man, does it seem I just went in real quick to steal something as fast as possible.

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    • Spliffman1@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Yeah wtf… I go into one big supermarket just to piss sometimes because they have a nice bathroom, then walk right out unashamedly

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      • SocialMediaRefugee@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        I memorized all of the best, publicly available bathrooms in Boston. It was extremely important info. The best is restaurants with bar seating because you can just say you are headed to the bar but no one ever tried to stop me anyway.

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    • SocialMediaRefugee@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      My wife always feels guilty about leaving a small shop without buying anything and will say stuff like “We’ll be back!”. I have to remind her we’re under no obligation to buy anything and you shouldn’t feel guilty about it.

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    • xX_fnord_Xx@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      I won’t let myself leave a local book store without buying anything, hence I only visit when I’m out of reading material.

      Probably plays back into when I helped watch my father’s and mother’s trade show tables respectively. My father would sell sports cards back in the 90s and he was lucky to have one paying customer all day at an event we had spent all morning setting up for.

      My mother used to paint whimsical designs on chunks of wood (toll painting) and set up a table of her painted wood art various church sales. I saw the hours my mom had spent tracing and painting those dumb little seasonal characters, only to see these rich bitches saunter by her table, turn her work over, say “That’s cute!”, And walk on.

      To this day I will not walk into an antique store or junk shop or book store without at least ten bucks to burn. It feels gross to take up a shopkeeps time and space without buying something.

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  • hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    This reminds me of how I this summer I went to a store only to discover that they don’t sell the ice cream I wanted to buy, so I just ended up buying some crackers to not feel akward. (but anyway, the crackers were good)

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  • mojo@lemm.ee ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    What it’s like to have anxiety when doing anything

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  • NickwithaC@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Those aren’t Kermit’s eyes!

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  • Smoogs@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    It’s bad how we responsible for a businesses model.

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  • son_named_bort@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    I just leave without buying anything. Sometimes I go into a store just to use the restroom and then leave. It’s perfectly legal.

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    • AffineConnection@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      It’s not just legal—it’s not even impolite.

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    • Mdotaut801@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Yeah. Tell that to my man Mohd that works at the 7/11 by my office. Ain’t nobody using the restroom without buying something.

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      • sociablefish@lemm.ee ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        Remember the american assumption of the internet

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  • TheObserver@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Me when i walk in to get my daily powerade and they don’t have my flavor. I’m in and out in 30 seconds flat but i feel so guilty over nothing.

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  • Kolanaki@yiffit.net ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Me, who has 13 salamis in his pants: Oh, it’s not wrong to steal? Whew. What a relief.

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    • eezeebee@lemmy.ca ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      It’s fine since you brought them from home

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      • SocialMediaRefugee@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        “These are my day-to-day sausages.”

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    • DragonTypeWyvern@literature.cafe ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Whether you doing it because you’re broke, or just love the thrill, remember:

      Publix, Kroger’s, and Walmart heirs have all donated to neo-Nazi causes so steal from them most.

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      • KuroJ@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        All jokes aside.

        Please people, do not actually steal from these stores. This is the quickest way to get arrested and end up with a criminal record.

        The prosecutor is not going to give a damn what your reasons were for stealing so please keep that in mind.

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  • CarbonatedPastaSauce@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    I would love to understand the psychology behind this feeling.

    In my case I think it was being raised by an ex-Catholic. Whole lotta undeserved guilt trips in my household growing up!

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    • blackbelt352@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Raised catholic here too, maybe catholic guilt but personally I think it’s more so the pervading idea that people implicitly aren’t allowed to exist in a space outside the home or offices unless they spend money and by walking out without buying anything bypasses the normal routine of going to a store to get something and going through some kind of checkout process.

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      • superpop@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        yeah the more hours you spend outside without spending money the worse it gets

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