He needs a doctor, and fast. Best case scenario it is ulcerative collitis. Worst case he is getting an MRI of his brain and brainstem to find out it is a central tumor and will only be getting worse.
Anon's gastric emergency
Submitted 11 months ago by MrJameGumb@lemmy.world to greentext@sh.itjust.works
https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/ba562cb0-79b9-4274-be00-c4d7fdeb4fa4.png
Comments
MrEff@lemmy.world 11 months ago
fibojoly@sh.itjust.works 11 months ago
Doctor Google concurs : it’s cancer.
tom_was_taken@lemmynsfw.com 11 months ago
Well, it’s never lupus, so…
Zeppo@sh.itjust.works 11 months ago
Seems a bit dramatic. Could be as simple as lactose intolerance, or IBS, or something like Celiac disease.
Tyfud@lemmy.world 11 months ago
It’s likely UC. Symptoms fit.
MrEff@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Yeah, colon/anal cancer will do this as well.
cRazi_man@lemm.ee 11 months ago
Anon might have ulcerative colitis.
ryannathans@aussie.zone 11 months ago
Or held their shit so much their nerves are fucked
NuWuX@sh.itjust.works 11 months ago
Just gotta eat enough cheese to get a solid plug going every day.
WallsToTheBalls@lemmynsfw.com 11 months ago
shudders
Pacattack57@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Anon needs to stop using a butt plug
GluWu@lemm.ee 11 months ago
He actually just needs to go up a size
TwoBeeSan@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Anons got a looser ass than liljunex
Zeppo@sh.itjust.works 11 months ago
Or just leave it in, easy fix.
CptEnder@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Like a flag in breeze
FartsWithAnAccent@fedia.io 11 months ago
Damn it Anon, go see a fucking doctor!
bleistift2@sopuli.xyz 11 months ago
You know you can wash clothes, right?
MrJameGumb@lemmy.world 11 months ago
I know that, yes. Apparently Anon doesn’t though. Either that or his “accident” was so bad that no amount of washing will make those underpants usable again.
nifty@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Anon is living in the Middle Ages, 30s now is prime of your life, shit doesn’t get loose like that till you’re 80s+
Corkyskog@sh.itjust.works 11 months ago
Maybe. Need to not eat like shit, or drink heavily. If you’re genetics are bad, you might need to exercise regularly too.
merc@sh.itjust.works 11 months ago
It could just be lactose intolerance.
MrJameGumb@lemmy.world 11 months ago
I guess so, if he’s having a big glass of milk with every meal. Are there adults who do that?
merc@sh.itjust.works 11 months ago
Lactose is in a lot of different foods, not just in milk. That’s what’s so nasty about lactose intolerance. It’s in the chocolate bar (milk chocolate). It’s in the creamy pasta sauce. It’s in the coffee-based drink. It’s in mashed potatoes. It’s in pizza. It’s in a lot of breads. It’s sometimes in potato chips, crackers or ramen. Burger King used to use it on their french fries. It’s in a lot of sauces like dips, salad dressings, sometimes even mayonnaise. In Switzerland it’s in the sugary fizzy drinks. Some women have even discovered it’s in their birth control!
Basically, if you didn’t make it yourself, you have to assume it might have lactose in it.
Zeppo@sh.itjust.works 11 months ago
Let’s see… do adults eat sour cream, yogurt or Alfredo?
curiousaur@reddthat.com 11 months ago
Colorectal cancer. You have colorectal cancer and are very likely dying. Please see a doctor.
CancerMancer@sh.itjust.works 11 months ago
Sounds like bro needs more fibre. Liquid shit means you’re eating like a dumbass.
Harvey656@lemmy.world 11 months ago
I’m 31 now, I do not have this problem. I mean I don’t hood it anymore, unless I absolutely have to, but for real anon needs to see a doctor.
RubyRhod@lemm.ee 11 months ago
Could someone please explain “green text” to me.
Is it from a specific platform or…?
I’ve been on the reddit sub for years and it was always entertaining, but I never actually knew wtf.
superkret@feddit.org 11 months ago
It’s from 4chan. The text turns green when you put a > in front of the line. It’s used to denote quotes, but also for “greentexting”, which is a certain type of post typically used to tell a meme-worthy (most often fictional) story from your life.
If you’ve never been to 4chan, do yourself a favor and keep it that way.
MossyFeathers@pawb.social 11 months ago
Anon might need to see a doctor. I don’t think it’s normal to become incontinent the moment you turn 30.
MrJameGumb@lemmy.world 11 months ago
There were several very angry comments about eating more fiber lol
idiomaddict@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Yeah, I would think about my diet/stress/caffeine level if I even had cramps before a shit, like what are you doing to your body if shitting is regularly a struggle at age 30 without a medical problem? Your life could be so much better if you took care of yourself/sought medical advice. I know not everyone can afford to see a doctor, but it’s cheaper to catch something like bowel cancer early.
mnemonicmonkeys@sh.itjust.works 11 months ago
Yeah, fiber would be 0 help here, and possibly make it worse. Anon needs to see a doctor.
Personally I find it annoying and frustrating that people will automatically assume poop problems means the person needs more fiber no matter what. It’s not a magic cure-all, and pretending like it is is completely stupid
sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works 11 months ago
Nope. I’m over 30 and it’s like a light switch. 😜
Jk, no issues whatsoever with my sphincter.
ID411@lemmy.dbzer0.com 11 months ago
Like my old man used to say, look after your sphincter and your sphincter will look after you.
KillingTimeItself@lemmy.dbzer0.com 11 months ago
30 days after you turn thirty though, that’s probably fine, same if 10 days prior.