The alternative to this is to join, get deployed, then mess everything up as bad as possible. Be completely useless, worse than useless even. Fuck up every assignment you’re given, hopefully so badly it causes lots of damage and possibly save some lives.
Hey guys I'm home
Submitted 16 hours ago by Mynameisallen@lemmy.zip to [deleted]
https://lemmy.zip/pictrs/image/35cff906-6fa2-4d47-8e65-774386f320a5.avif
Comments
LogicalDrivel@sopuli.xyz 11 hours ago
WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today 44 minutes ago
Sounds like I was born for that job!
GregorGizeh@lemmy.zip 4 hours ago
Enjoy getting herded at gunpoint into a minefield. There are no real rules in a total/world war. If you fuck up on purpose or refuse to do your duty you will likely get severely punished by your own side.
applebusch@lemmy.blahaj.zone 9 hours ago
Bonus points if they can never pin it on you so they keep giving you shit to fuck up.
QuinnyCoded@sh.itjust.works 8 hours ago
like that one guy that would expose spies but was so incredibly secretive about it he was made the lead of the department made to find the leaker
666dollarfootlong@lemmy.world 4 hours ago
Unless you have extreme confidence you won’t get caught, that seems like a one way ticket to physical and mental abuse hell. Well, probably prison too, but atleast there you might come across other likeminded people and you don’t have to touch any guns.
GreenKnight23@lemmy.world 11 hours ago
that’s a good way to get hit by friendly fire.
ClownStatue@piefed.social 15 hours ago
Plot twist: draft dodgers will be sent to El Salvador and lose their US citizenship. SCOTUS will OK this b/c if you’re unwilling to “defend” the US, you don’t deserve citizenship.
AffineConnection@lemmy.world 14 hours ago
if you’re unwilling to “defend” the US
*unwilling to “defend” Israel
Mynameisallen@lemmy.zip 15 hours ago
I’d rather that too
RunJun@lemmy.dbzer0.com 12 hours ago
Losing citizenship without already having citizenship somewhere else is bad. Like BAD bad.
Soulg@ani.social 14 hours ago
I don’t think you want to go to torture prison
Passerby6497@lemmy.world 13 hours ago
Whoops, looks like there might be a number of friendly fire incidents in the future…
huquad@lemmy.ml 10 hours ago
I would never dodge the draft. Too good of an opportunity to get a shot in at israel.
moonshadow@slrpnk.net 16 hours ago
Draft dodgers hmu, there’s plenty of room (and plenty of choring) at my place
CIA_chatbot@lemmy.world 16 hours ago
Umm yea, my place too, totally not a sting operation
moonshadow@slrpnk.net 15 hours ago
FUD, classic chatbot strat
Jankatarch@lemmy.world 6 hours ago
This is lemmy.
I will wear a literal maid outfit while doing those chores to spite the nazis.
:3
moonshadow@slrpnk.net 5 hours ago
If you must lol, they kinda boil down to “get wood or be cold, get food or be hungry”. I got tools and infra to share, not a whole lot else
Fokeu@lemmy.zip 13 hours ago
Penal batalion, once manpower runs out they’re gonna send you to field without a gun. Sorry bro
MacaqueAndCheese@lemmy.ca 15 hours ago
My brother’s dad used to bang this draft dodger named Mustard Guts Jimmy every summer when we’d go camping and it was usually the highlight of the trip because he always cooked the best honey mustard sausages. 19 years later I found out they called him Mustard Guts because whenever my brothers dad banged him he’d secrete a mustard like substance out his ass and use it as a condiment. Pretty gross to think about but nostalgia has me wanting to go camping with them so I can have those delicious sausages again.
Ghostie@lemmy.zip 12 hours ago
ayyy@sh.itjust.works 9 hours ago
Don’t listen, it’s a shitty bot that always does the same bit.
GreenKnight23@lemmy.world 13 hours ago
MacaqueAndCheese@lemmy.ca 13 hours ago
I believe the kids these days call it queer absurdist art but I think it’s fuckin dumb
Lushed_Lungfish@lemmy.ca 14 hours ago
Penal battalion ahoy!
20cello@lemmy.world 16 hours ago
Not soldiers nor generals , conscientious objectors are the real heroes when the call to arms comes from a fascist government
redsand@infosec.pub 14 hours ago
Some have the fortitude needed for saboteurism
Fedegenerate@fedinsfw.app 8 hours ago
We do a little menace