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Anon freezes time

⁨804⁩ ⁨likes⁩

Submitted ⁨⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩ by ⁨Early_To_Risa@sh.itjust.works⁩ to ⁨greentext@sh.itjust.works⁩

https://sh.itjust.works/pictrs/image/c3ec9950-5235-4b0b-889c-bfa2e2c950bd.png

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Comments

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  • atmur@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    The frozen chipotle employee watching me walk behind the counter and make myself a burrito 180 times before time resumes

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    • mycodesucks@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      The Home Depot employees watching me steal an entire self-sufficient off-grid home one wheelbarrow load at a time.

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      • wesker@lemmy.sdf.org ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        The grocerystore employee watching me stick every carrot in my ass.

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  • Th4tGuyII@fedia.io ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    And that is why you should always test newfound superpowers on a small scale before blowing your load on freezing time for 6 months you depraved Anon

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    • iAvicenna@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      apply it to a corner before using it on the whole surface

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      • sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        Instructions unclear, am prostitute and my pimp never lets me leave my corner.

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    • piranhaphish@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      How apropos.

      www.reddit.com/r/greentext/…/anon_can_stop_time/

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    • Classy@sh.itjust.works ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      blowing your load

      Nice

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  • lseif@sopuli.xyz ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    thats fine with me, since im not sick in the head, and i respect people’s consent

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    • Klaymore@sh.itjust.works ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      This is a 4Chan user

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    • buttfarts@lemy.lol ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Sounds like the type of thing the sickest fuck in the room would say to avoid suspicion

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      • workerONE@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        That’s funny because this sounds like the type of thing the sickest fuck in the room would say to avoid suspicion

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      • Surreal@programming.dev ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        That’s my thought every time someone virtue signaling

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    • Danquebec@sh.itjust.works ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Didn’t even think about this. I thought of how crushingly boring and annoying it must have been to have been unable to move at all. For 6 months.

      And now I realize it must have been dreadful, at first.

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      • CheeseNoodle@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        Imagine if your one of the thousands of people who would likely happen to have the sun in their eyes at the instant of freezing.

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      • imecth@fedia.io ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        Basically sleep paralysis

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    • kusivittula@sopuli.xyz ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      not me. i would have done some nasty shit.

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      • lseif@sopuli.xyz ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        genuinely asking: what sort of things do you mean, and why ?

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    • loaExMachina@sh.itjust.works ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Assume some people were around you when you froze time. They saw you did something and then were the only one who could move.

      Then they went through the absolute nightmare of being paralyzed and conscious for six months. And they know you’ve caused it.

      I highly doubt the whole world concented to this.

      Whatever else you did in frozen time barely changes a thing.

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      • Tired8281@lemmy.ca ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        What if you spent your frozen time, determining the problems of everyone in the world, and solving them? So, when everybody got unfrozen, it was a utopia.

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    • Snowclone@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Dude you can get in trouble for doing a lot of things that aren’t a criminal sex act. There’s so much more out there! Doing H until you nod out in public, stealing products, playing guitar after 10pm, orchestrating dog fights, gambling on when elderly people will die, driving a class B school bus with an expired physical on file, the possibility are endless.

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      • Kedly@lemm.ee ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        Like half of these dont work if time is stopped tho.

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    • Mango@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      I respect people’s consent in the scenario where it’s something they experience or are affected by it. I’d imagine frozen time is consequence free zone for everyone.

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      • jorp@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        Yes this is fantasy but what you’re effectively stating here is that if you don’t get caught it’s not wrong. The same argument would justify groping a deep sleeper, do you think that’s not wrong?

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      • lseif@sopuli.xyz ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        i’d imagine not …???

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    • AI_toothbrush@lemmy.zip ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      I would still steel shit from larger chain shops to eat an stuff so that wouldnt work out. Also i would test my powers first.

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      • lseif@sopuli.xyz ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        steel shit? sounds painful…

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  • Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    How would people know I’ve been in bed for those 6 months??

    As far as they are concerned the cause of the phenomena is unknown.

    And next time it will be longer.

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  • Etterra@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Quick! Quick! Freeze it again!

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  • Fah_Q@lemmynsfw.com ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    If they complain freeze them again?

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  • Snowclone@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Always test until you know the rules!

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  • morphballganon@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Everyone who is still alive

    So make it count

    And wear a mask and a big coat

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    • androogee@midwest.social ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Image

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      • Furbag@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        Big Jakt.

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  • VirtualOdour@sh.itjust.works ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    That’s OK, they’ll know not to mess with me.

    Especially after the news cycles through hundreds of otherwise inexplicably brutal events like ‘oil company boardroom welded shut full of heaters’, ‘bee killing pestocide.producer found locked in a room full of wasps’, ‘putin awakes in room full people he’s been oppressing’, ‘guy who invented mobile game adverts could only leave his house after clicking on a very small button that’s actual hit box is slightly off the graphic’

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  • shani66@ani.social ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    At that point I’d just go all in, live in the just moment for a century and upend the entire world to make up for it.

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  • Sanctus@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    They can have fun rebuilding the cloud over, and over, and over again.

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