Malört: Tonight’s the night you fight your dad.
Cerveza Cristal
Submitted 8 months ago by fossilesque@mander.xyz to science_memes@mander.xyz
https://mander.xyz/pictrs/image/5ced65c8-1a59-4e10-b0d6-206e97f4edf7.jpeg
Comments
TurtleTourParty@midwest.social 8 months ago
LoamImprovement@beehaw.org 8 months ago
Malort: Those pants aren’t gonna shit themselves.
pacoboyd@lemm.ee 8 months ago
Nobody drinks the first part of that and thinks it’s pretty good.
lettruthout@lemmy.world 8 months ago
Well, science does tell us that alcohol is a solution.
Infamousblt@hexbear.net 8 months ago
Chicagoan spotted
MrBusiness@lemmy.zip 8 months ago
I’ve never heard any Chicagoan utter the words “this tastes pretty good” when addressing Malört. Malört is bottled at Satan’s urinal.
GluWu@lemm.ee 8 months ago
Ochem makes so much sense when I’m drunk. I just wish I could remember how because sober me doesn’t understand shit, I just know electrons will work themselves out or whatever.
MrShankles@reddthat.com 8 months ago
Drunk you is probably overconfident in your own understanding. Personal anecdote though, in reagrd to me solving math problems. I loved being able to finally solve the problem, and it seemed “so simple” after so much time had been spent, mulling it over. And then sober me would realize how wrong I was because of a ‘simple’ mistake that drunk me made. I loved the “Ureka!” moments, but sober me would usually wreck it the next day
But again, that’s my personal experience. Would love to know that’s not your own experience. But just a friendly forewarning of “check your work more than twice”
ryathal@sh.itjust.works 8 months ago
Served best with Old Style.
kernelle@0d.gs 8 months ago
Takes out lightsaber from sleave it’s actually a refreshing beverage CERVAZA CRIIISTAL
niktemadur@lemmy.world 8 months ago
“What’s your opinion on this iceless glass of liquor?”
“I think it’s neat.”bl_r@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 months ago
Drunk me writes self modifying code that became critical to logging functionalities. Still works, but I won’t touch it with a 10 foot pole.
I don’t know how it works, but I know it does, and I know its macros all the way down.
Normally I need to toss out 1/2 of my code that was written while drinking even a single beer, but that night I somehow had good code after drinking half a bottle of pure rye whiskey. Guess my Ballmer peak is somewhere between “bro i miss them so much” and blackout.
spittingimage@lemmy.world 8 months ago
Isn’t Malört a bitters, and meant to be drunk as part of a cocktail?
scoobford@lemmy.zip 8 months ago
Yes but also no.
It is an extremely bitter liqueur.
It is not intended for cocktails. It is traditionally consumed in shots, like the beverage it is based on (Swedish wormwood schnapps).
There are some cocktails that use malort as an ingredient, but not many. You’re probably thinking of cocktail bitters (like Angostura, consumed by dashing into a cocktail), or amaro (a sweet and bitter class of Italian liqueurs, like fernet, amaro Montenegro, or campari).
Yes, I know the Italians consider red bitter liqueurs to not be amari. No, I don’t care.
tophneal@sh.itjust.works 8 months ago
No, it’s hate in a bottle
Death_Equity@lemmy.world 8 months ago
For anyone who doesn’t know what that drink is, it is a relic of the times where alcohol was considered medicine and it expresses that with flavor. It tastes like antiseptic and Band-Aids. It is universally considered a terrible alcohol with no redeeming qualities except the joy of Sato masochistoc introductions to the unfamiliar.
Malört, for when you want to unfriend someone in-person.
GiantChickDicks@lemmy.ml 8 months ago
I will admit I love introducing people to it, but I always preface it as the worst tasting liqueur for most people. I have a wonky palate, and I love bitter and herbal flavors. I have introduced it to some people who enjoy strong herbal flavors that hadn’t heard of it and actually enjoyed it.
I usually have a bottle of Malort at home, and I especially love it when my stomach is unsettled. I sip it neat or on the rocks.
Fun aside, it’s also a great way to add some complexity and balance to an overly sweet sparkling wine. It has its place in making cocktails, but I get why most people don’t like it.
Death_Equity@lemmy.world 8 months ago
Consider therapy, I am passively worried about you.
MystikIncarnate@lemmy.ca 8 months ago
So… Along the lines of Jager Meister, but worse?
Death_Equity@lemmy.world 8 months ago
Jäger does not have anywhere near the notoriety of bad flavor. People describe Jäger as tasting like licorice, Malört is described as tasting like if your shame and regret were fermented and filtered through a burning Chicago dumpster.
Malört, because you won’t be getting your security deposit back.
Malört, tonight is the day you fight your dad.
Malört, the official drink of poor decisions.
Malört, the strongly-worded last call.
Malört, because “fuck you” is polite.
You order Jäger and everybody is like ok, do you. You order Malört and the staff ask if you are sure and follow that up with asking if you are ok.
There is a bar that has $5 shots, Malört is $2.
At the local Binny’s(alcohol retailer), the manager initiates new hires with a shot of Malört.
Malört is something you need to experience, because I hate you.
Syringe@lemmy.world 8 months ago
No. Malort is it’s own experience. That you can still taste three days l later.
It’s primary use is for Chicago locals to weed or the tourists
xkforce@lemmy.world 8 months ago
I remember malort tasting like what I imagine grapefruit flavored floor cleaner would taste like. So yeah its much much much worse than jager
bruhbeans@lemmy.ml 8 months ago
It’s got a worse reputation but i’d drink malort over jaeger all fay
Saganaki@lemmy.one 8 months ago
Personally, I think it tastes like dumpster juice. I’ve never tasted dumpster juice, but I’m convinced.
Frozengyro@lemmy.world 8 months ago
There are some who do actually enjoy it. I don’t know why. Personally I think it tastes like dirty sidewalk and cigarette ashes mixed together.
Slovene@feddit.nl 8 months ago
Yup: m.youtube.com/watch?v=f6nVI0T8Or8
MelonYellow@lemmy.ca 8 months ago
I love people’s attempts to describe it in the comments section
RubberElectrons@lemmy.world 8 months ago
That was hilarious lol
Deconceptualist@lemm.ee 8 months ago
I think it tastes like chewing on aspirin. So, yeah super bitter with no redeeming qualities.
fossilesque@mander.xyz 8 months ago
TIL