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When you have wiped once already and your butt has a change of heart

⁨240⁩ ⁨likes⁩

Submitted ⁨⁨23⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago⁩ by ⁨mastertigurius@lemmy.world⁩ to ⁨[deleted]⁩

https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/34992a18-41d9-4dee-89ac-debfc655471c.jpeg

source

Comments

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  • scala@lemmy.ml ⁨3⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Bidet

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  • UnrefinedChihuahua@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨23⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Okay this post has been up 30mins and no one has said it yet, so I’m just gonna say it:

    Bidet.

    Have a great day.

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    • shneancy@lemmy.world ⁨22⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      i think this is more of a

      i thought i was done pooping, but after cleaning up i feel there’s more

      situation

      bidets are great, but they won’t fix this problem

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      • BurgerBaron@quokk.au ⁨3⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        Marker butt? Bidet will absolutely fix that if you turn the water pressure up to just below accidental enema.

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      • db2@lemmy.world ⁨20⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        *shituation

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      • Grail@multiverse.soulism.net ⁨5⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        Yeah but you don’t have to awkwardly hold your hand out to the side while you wait for your butt to squeeze out the next one.

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    • Switorik@sh.itjust.works ⁨23⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Most people in the states are afraid of them. Maybe they feel demasculated or are brain washed by big TP. I don’t know. It took me about 30 years to buy one and i must say it is life changing.

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      • restingOface@quokk.au ⁨22⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        Is this a regional thing? Most people I know in the USA are either enthusiastic about the product or at least intrigued by the concept.

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    • socsa@piefed.social ⁨22⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      The one we have is so powerful on the top setting, it will actually shoot water up your butt, which also can trigger a round 2 situation

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      • mastertigurius@lemmy.world ⁨22⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        Free enema

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      • HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world ⁨15⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        is that the one that’s the $35 cold water enema hooked up to the main?

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      • wreckedcarzz@lemmy.world ⁨22⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        Round 2

        FIGHT!

        🍑 💦

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    • mastertigurius@lemmy.world ⁨21⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Actually, our plumber was going to install one in our new bathroom. And then he just didn’t. :/

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    • HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world ⁨15⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      if you are in the united states they make this thing called a washlet. it’s basically what they call a bidet here. it’s a combined toilet seat and bidet, so you don’t have to do the waddle of shame to a different fixture. fancy ones have warm water, blow driers, heated seats, cameras, play songs when you sit down or stand up, like the works. toto is the top brand.

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      • RumAndCreole@lemmy.world ⁨15⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        I think I can do without the camera

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      • UnrefinedChihuahua@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨15⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        Yes, that’s what I have, just a seat attachment not a separate fixture! Like $60 CAD and I installed it in an hour or so.

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    • RickyRigatoni@piefed.zip ⁨22⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      How do you heat the water when the outlets are in the opposite wall :(

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      • UnrefinedChihuahua@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨22⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        We use a cold water one. You barely notice. It’s a bit refreshing.

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    • wreckedcarzz@lemmy.world ⁨22⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      While this improves the situation, it doesn’t grant you a guaranteed win every time. You make that assumption once.

      Source: literally getting my ass sprayed rn

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    • Rhaedas@fedia.io ⁨23⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      I get why it's better in so many ways. But for the topic of this particular post, it could have made things worse. As in a return trip soon after once you get moving. Whereas physically disturbing things sometimes encourages completion.

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    • Notyou@sopuli.xyz ⁨23⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      I was about to post about the greatness of bidets. I use water to blow my shit covered butt and get right back in the game. I don’t have to wait for the whole toilet paper wipe and then you have more to shit.

      I got a tushy bidet. Easy to install. It’s tushybidet.com and not tushy.com. that’s a different website.

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  • betterdeadthanreddit@lemmy.world ⁨22⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Or a change of fart.

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  • sundray@lemmus.org ⁨22⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    butt, wait!

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  • J3N5T4R@lemmy.world ⁨22⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Engage human crayon mode.

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    • DarrinBrunner@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      “It’s like wiping a marker.”

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    • HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world ⁨15⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      i have become pastel

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  • DrWorm@piefed.blahaj.zone ⁨22⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Billy Mays: but wait, there’s more

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  • in_my_honest_opinion@piefed.social ⁨21⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Like getting peanutbutter out of a shag carpet.

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    • ivanafterall@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨hour⁩ ago

      Pro-tip: let it dry overnight and it’s easier to cut out.

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  • BrundleFly2077@sh.itjust.works ⁨23⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Okay.

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