betterdeadthanreddit
@betterdeadthanreddit@lemmy.world
- Comment on They look warm... 6 days ago:
Georgia O’Keeffe would approve. At least they didn’t include molten wax running down the candle shaft… I mean, stick.
- Comment on Couldn't use toilet paper at a bathroom in Nanjing, as it required a QR Code that I was unable to scan 6 days ago:
That door looks way too flimsy to keep me from accessing shit tickets if I need them.
- Comment on Your Truck is Stupid Big 6 days ago:
Speeding. No one thinks big of you.
The automatic linking feature breaks with a URL ending in a period.
- Comment on Some people really lack civic sense 6 days ago:
Tie them together and move to the next car.
- Comment on Your Truck is Stupid Big 6 days ago:
And a small business for tax purposes.
- Comment on Your Truck is Stupid Big 6 days ago:
The US government classifies it as 8 tanks.
- Comment on If they're wet farts would the suit eventually start to rust? 2 weeks ago:
Be sure to clean and oil the armor too.
- Comment on Liberals and Leftists should buy guns. 2 weeks ago:
Not unless there’s a full moon.
- Comment on When will gas stations start selling rotisserie chicken? 2 weeks ago:
Right before and then until a string of foodborne illness deaths resulting in a Chubbyemu video.
- Comment on Deal with it, Libby. 2 weeks ago:
Fuck you, FEMA! But also, help me, FEMA!
- Comment on The ultimate goatse shitpost 2 weeks ago:
Manually opening a butthole.
- Comment on Just reminding everyone about what's next 2 weeks ago:
Stained glass version of Jesus and the Phallus-ees.
- Comment on When you see someone crying about the Virginia redistricting, show them this. I've used it hundreds of times today. 2 weeks ago:
Are you reading it to them too or do they usually have somebody for that?
- Comment on A long-ass way to write 'not parmesan'. 2 weeks ago:
Parmesan’t.
- Comment on Even if we found a feasible way through physics to travel through time, wouldn't it still be impossible due to the evolution of bacteria and our immune systems? 2 weeks ago:
Or just be patient like the rest of us and wait for it to get here. Why all the rush?
- Comment on waking up sandwiched between 2 buff guys got me feeling like: 2 weeks ago:
Makes me think of the video for Tove Lo’s “Elevator Eyes”.
- Comment on If you (a regular American citizen) had actionable, insider knowledge about the US Federal Government/Military and felt the public should know, how would you tell everyone? 2 weeks ago:
Megaphone and a street corner like the apocalyptic doomsayer street preachers we get all our most reliable information from.
- Comment on MrKaplan and LW's mods right now 2 weeks ago:
(Let me know if there’s a better place to share these memes)
/dev/null
- Comment on My eyes are down here! 2 weeks ago:
Must be from the same planet as the Ballchinians.
- Comment on wow😰 2 weeks ago:
And harder.
- Comment on wow😰 2 weeks ago:
Assuming the pre-surgery length was something normal (making it a rounding error from this point on) and the average 3.5" long flaccid penis takes 130 mL of blood to achieve a 5.17" erection (4.59" in circumference), those extra ~2.1 billion inches would require 5.4 million-ish liters of blood to fill. If those are 2.1 billion flaccid inches, call it about 8 million liters.
Average total blood volume for an adult human is 4.5 to 5.6 liters so we’re going to need more. An Olympic swimming pool is 50x25 meters with a minimum depth of 2 meters. That’s 2.5 million liters. It’ll take two of those full of blood and a little extra to get things up and running.
Somewhere in that ballpark anyway, I think. Don’t rely on this for medical purposes. Average dick-mensions and pool specifications from Wikipedia, blood fill numbers from a Healthline article.
- Comment on Is there a way I can become Baptized a Catholic without going to school or memorizing all the saints I am 37? Always thought it would be an honor to be Catholic. Like being knighted. 2 weeks ago:
Just dunk your head in the bath and pretend it’s a crusty old virgin (altar boys don’t count!) holding you there. No need to bother with the rest of it.
- Comment on Can I offer you some cocks in these trying times? 2 weeks ago:
Just what my militia and I were missing for our Oregonian wildlife refuge takeover.
- Comment on ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ at the Cannes and Venice Film Festivals. There was a standing ovation. 3 weeks ago:
Toilet rail of Ivermectin.
- Comment on pegging order 3 weeks ago:
- Comment on Doing the Lord's work. 3 weeks ago:
I don’t think it’s any better, just that it’s part of the standard playbook. Up there with the unnecessary red circle and arrow pointing at nothing.
- Comment on Doing the Lord's work. 3 weeks ago:
Understands engagement bait
- Comment on I might shit my pants just a little if I saw this 3 weeks ago:
Then you start hiding real bodies once people get used to the trend.
- Comment on What's the best way to tell a kid that their dog died? 3 weeks ago:
Give the gift of never having to wonder what to talk about in therapy.
- Comment on Do you speak my language? 3 weeks ago:
He just smiled and gave me a Vegemite sandwich.
