Submitted 1 year ago by ickplant@lemmy.world to [deleted]
https://i.postimg.cc/MKFq2JSw/Choice.jpg
Green
I can handle being the weird dude that takes super loud shits in public bathrooms. That’ll just make people leave me alone. I can’t handle making my girlfriend feel like shit every time we’re intimate. That would be debilitating to our relationship.
I’d take green, easy. I’d just explain that it’s just a thing that happens once and I’d be set.
also like… many people already live with it lmao
the absolute state of people’s digestive health
Green will quickly result in having no girlfriend though, unless you come up with some scheme to allow you to never poop in the same building as her.
Or you explain it
I don’t mind a bit of construction work. Wouldn’t be hard to tear down the drywall in the bathroom and pack the stud walls with Rockwool soundproofing insulation. And also swap the door out for a double-thickness solid core sound-deadening door with a sealing sweep. That’s like a couple weekend’s worth of work max.
Also she is an absolute saint and would probably be fine dealing with it to stay with me.
So seither i embaress myself everytime i shit or nothing happens?
Embarrass? Dominate your duke dome. Yell with a nice, themly yell that says to everyone “that’s a shit that’s gonna take at least one flush”
Jokes on you, I do both
that’s my superpower.
I already scream when I poop. It’s not that big of a deal.
Wife in the other room: Are you ok!?
Me: Just prayin’
ooAAAAAAAAAAA we’re halfway there
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
livin on a prayer
Poop scream would be fun.
Green.
There are ways to dampen and quiet down the screaming.
Since you probably always poop alone, you can use external tools and no one will know.
So green can with experimenting and time lead to almost no side effects.
Red
Added bonus: I’ll never cry.
Sometimes i wonder whether people are just joking or if there are really so many sex starved people out there.
There’s a lot of us. Extreme shyness and such. Doesn’t matter how cute and handsome you are, if you’re too chickenshit to go talk to the girl smiling at you from across the bar. It’s also difficult to know if she’s really into you, she could just be Canadian. :D And then you have all the incels whom I really don’t understand. But they have a whole subreddit, if you wanna go take a dip in the cesspool.
The absolute state of the people in this thread
Wait, you’re telling me poop screams aren’t normal?
That’s just Tuesday for my cat
I don’t remember clicking those both buttons at the same time … :|
What if I already do this?
I choose death
Happy feast of Winter Veil!
Lol crying during sex can be cathartic
So I only need to do one of these anymore? Thats improvement
Yes!
Yes.
robocall@lemmy.world 1 year ago
I guess cry profusely after sex because I never get any
tourist@lemmy.world 1 year ago
Same
Option may as well have been “lose an eyelash every time you get elected president of Uzbekistan”
Mandarbmax@lemmy.world 1 year ago
During.
smotherlove@sh.itjust.works 1 year ago
Jokes on you, I’m into that shit.
TheWanderer@lemm.ee 1 year ago
Same! Virgins ASSEMBLE 💪
😭
Slovene@feddit.nl 1 year ago
… at a brothel