That doesn’t seem like that many cookies. Assuming an average of three cookies per household, that’s only ~100 million houses visted. Santa is either racist or he’s being paid off by the elven mafia to exclusively visit certain homes, only logical explanation for the discrepancy in the cookie consumption to global household ratio.
Merry Christmas to Santa's digestive tract!
Submitted 3 months ago by misterdoctor@lemmy.world to [deleted]
https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/19833a6b-752b-4237-9e60-f1a3f5f36194.jpeg
Comments
Sabre363@sh.itjust.works 3 months ago
FooBarrington@lemmy.world 3 months ago
Gotta imagine not every house puts out cookies. And since there are ~127 million households, that seems to work out pretty well.
Tho I have heard he leaves out Milwaukee for religious reasons.
raspberriesareyummy@lemmy.world 3 months ago
There are what now? This planet has 8 billion people, Einstein.
Sabre363@sh.itjust.works 3 months ago
Ahh, but that 127 million only accounts for the United States or perhaps a few other nations. There surely are at least a couple other countries in the world that are the ‘Santa Visit Roster’
qevlarr@lemmy.world 3 months ago
Colour_me_triggered@lemm.ee 3 months ago
My friend, Santa eats mince pies and sherry in Britain. A few cookies on the other side of the moat barely soaks up the alcohol.
FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 3 months ago
Honestly, it’s amazing he doesn’t fall out of the sleigh.
Blackmist@feddit.uk 3 months ago
It’s amazing how Santa always wanted to drink the same cheap lager as my dad.
M137@lemmy.world 3 months ago
[deleted]LifeOfChance@lemmy.world 3 months ago
The alternative is they include the whole world then it’s “not everybody celebrates christmas!!” It’s a lose/lose situation. It’s so easy to be upset and take things to serious. Lighten up enjoy the joke and move on. It’s not that deep. People aren’t gonna sit down and analyze the probable statics of who does and who does not celebrate then make a meme.
explodicle@sh.itjust.works 3 months ago
There is absolutely no way that many Americans are on the Nice List.
huquad@lemmy.ml 3 months ago
I need sleep. I read this as three numbers in an array and was curious why Santa split them over three days.
RandomVideos@programming.dev 3 months ago
Thats why i always write bigs numbers without any separators
336150386 is so much more readable
AI_toothbrush@lemmy.zip 3 months ago
Also me after eating that many cookies on christmas night…
JasonDJ@lemmy.zip 3 months ago
My kid probably got pretty close to that number. He’s fine.
Good kid. He’s got my wife’s eyes and my eating disorder.
lugal@sopuli.xyz 3 months ago
He needs some time to recover. That’s why Christmas is only once a year
BudgetBandit@sh.itjust.works 3 months ago
Actually, there is only 1 Santa who gets cloned into every Santa believing household on earth. But this clone has a deadly allergy to milk. The body gets removed by an elf afterwards.
ummthatguy@lemmy.world 3 months ago
Could also be the result of a transporter shenanigans. Chief O’Brien has a regularly updated copy in the pattern buffer and releases a few handfuls every holiday season… then a quick memory scan and into the matter recycler 'til next time.
Image
jaybone@lemmy.world 3 months ago
What a coincidence, every holiday season I also release a few handfuls.
theedqueen@lemmy.world 3 months ago
So like a Mr Meseeks?
FooBarrington@lemmy.world 3 months ago
youtu.be/ljV_kvV12gw