Daily Discussion Thread: 🌧 Monday, November 18, 2024

Comments

• imoldgreeeg@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  Thank you everyone for the kindness. I have a big tray of roast veg in the oven so dinner/lunch is sorted and yummy at least. Will be having an early night and hopefully a sleep

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  • Gibsonhasafluffybutt@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Goodnight mate :)

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• imoldgreeeg@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  just need to get this out but no obligation to read it

  I feel really alone right now. I feel like I am drowning at work and my general exhaustion level is so high I am not catching up there or at home. I am wrought with anxiety and I have kinda lost the will to push through. There are so many big things to be done and I am stuck on details. And every time I make time someone else has a problem and I get dragged sideways. And it’s hard to push through when I feel like the world is a mess anyway. What good can I really do? Am I just burning myself out in a corner for nothing? For reasons the work situation is not a “can you talk to your manager and ask for XYZ” one…what I am carrying is legit mine but I am struggling. I am just dead sick of being the grown up and the strong one for others right now. I want to go home…whatever that means.

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  • underwatermagpies@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    I’ve been in a similar place. Can you take some stress leave/sick leave? Ideally at least two weeks so that a) you can unwind properly and b) somebody else has to pick up the slack at work.

    Do it now, not once project x is done or when we’ve met tgat bext deadline. New stuff will keep coming up.

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  • CEOofmyhouse56@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    I don’t know what the answers are but you’ve got a friend in me. 💜

    Everytime I press the red heart it comes up black. Maybe I’ve used up my red hearts quota or run out of red ink. 🤷‍♀️ anyway red heart, red heart, red heart.

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    • Llabyrinthine@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      It’s purple to me?

      (I always use black hearts.)

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    • imoldgreeeg@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      red heart red heart back. Thanks. It means a lot having a safe space. I have good real world friends but sometimes I just need a scream into the ether

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  • Gibsonhasafluffybutt@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    I can relate to the loneliness and the feeling of drowning at work.

    I don’t have any real advice, but I hope you can find some peace soon ❤️

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  • Llabyrinthine@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Is stress leave a possibility for you?

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    • Seagoon_@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      yes, take the load off at home

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  • tone212_@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Ughh this feeling of aloneness while being overwhelmed with work, I’ve felt it so many times. The only advice I can offer is to look after yourself as much as you can. A home cooked meal, going for a walk or doing other exercise, proper wind down before going to sleep. This past weekend wasn’t great for me mentally and doing these three things helped.

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  • indisin@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Hey interwebs friend, this is the reason I’m on a sabbatical. Can you afford to take the break even if it means burning through your savings?

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  • melbaboutown@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    I’m not sure what to say but feel very like this in other ways.

    I’m wondering if there’s any way you can half ass some of the details a little bit so you don’t get stuck? I don’t know what you’re working on but sometimes done > perfect

    Otherwise you’re well within your rights to insist on the time you’ve carved out so you don’t get dragged sideways.

    Whatever happens I wish you can get some peace of rest somehow, even for a moment.

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    • imoldgreeeg@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      I have three weeks off at christmas, and there are just a couple of really crappy situations to navigate first. I struggle when I can’t even see a start. I’m setting a hard “pens down” rule at night so I can get a little bit of relaxattion in each day. Thanks for the thoughts

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  • Seagoon_@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    so many hugs

    maybe the world and your little part of the world would be a million times messier if not for you

    like in Alice in Wonderland, we have to run just to keep in the same place

    Since you can’t delegate how about resetting your timetable?

    On a positive note, it’s good they want a grown up and do defer.

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    • imoldgreeeg@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Thanks - I’m trying with the timetable, but my body gave up on my overnight and I crash slept in. Luckily I could take the morning off but that’s partly why I was feeling down - I desperately need a timetable and can’t stick to it. I will persist.

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  • anotherspringchicken@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    I get a lot of what you’re talking about, too, especially the close to burnout feelings. Hugs and sympathy from across the ether - you’re not alone 💛

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• StudChud@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  I am okay, promise. It was a M O M E N T due to the vast amounts of alcohol I had.

  But, went back home with my cousin and kept going till 3am with jaegermeister on ice 😱

  My head hurts and hates me

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  • Bottom_racer@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Hope you’re feeling better. jaegermeister can be a slippery slope at times.

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  • anotherspringchicken@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Big hugs. Hope you’re feeling better 💛

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  • LowExperience2368@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Hope you feel better soon, Spud 💜

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• Llabyrinthine@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  For the DDT fam:

  Pearl Jam, Marvel Stadium, 18 November, 2024

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  • LowExperience2368@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Awesome! I wish Pixies did solo shows too.

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    • Llabyrinthine@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Me, too. I couldn’t get down in time today. ☹️

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  • Gibsonhasafluffybutt@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Wooooooooooo

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• Llabyrinthine@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  I’ve almost lost my voice, but I am seriously emotional. Seeing Black live has always been a wish of my mine and tonight it came true.

  I am so privileged.

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• just_kitten@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  I’ve only just managed to load my car with a full, penultimate load of stuff (and a fucking busted tyre still in the back lol).

  All the little jars of spices, the oils and vinegars, random pantry odds and ends, the unbelievable amount of stuff in the bathroom, other stray items like a random desk lamp and bits in various containers just dumped into a box… couch accoutrements…

  Had a shower in the old place, thankfully had the foresight to leave a change of clothes out, finally eating my only real meal for the day. I’m going to go straight to the other place, slap a sheet on the mattress and call it a night.

  Chuck a sickie tomorrow, start moving stuff up, get tyre organised, clean old place with friend…

  I’m seriously laughing at how much I underestimated this. Next time I’ll start packing WAY earlier and take more time off!!

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• just_kitten@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  Hahahahahahahahahaha fuck me, of course I had to be careless and hit a kerb so hard I got a flat tyre on top of everything else… perfect timing…

  Luckily roadside assist came very quickly but now I need to get a new tyre within 2 days 😭 anyone have tips on how to find a good tyre shop? I have no frigging idea. Need it done pretty quickly…

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  • CEOofmyhouse56@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Google the ones closest to home. Pick the one that’s closest to 5 stars and lots of reviews. Get quotes from 3 of them. Pick one.

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    • just_kitten@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Top tier practical and logical advice. Thanks CEO. Found a few good ones close to home/work. Can’t do any online bookings til Wed but I’ve narrowed down three to call tomorrow first thing at 8am and put in a reminder on my phone. Done.

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  • Duenan@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Unless you’ve got a mechanic that you usually go to on a regular basis see if there’s a Bob Jane Tmart near you?

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    • just_kitten@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Haven’t found a mechanic for this car yet (used to use my old work’s one when I was working there, it’s too far). Thanks for the rec. Do you think they’ll be able to have a quick squizz at the undercarriage to let me know if there’s been any additional damage? I’m planning on a long drive over the holidays…

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  • underwatermagpies@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    I had to use MyCar for my last flat because they were the only place open between Christmas and New Year, and they were fine. Quick, efficient, friendly.

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    • just_kitten@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      There’s one near me too that’s got decent reviews, definitely one of the options I’ll call tomorrow

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• Bottom_racer@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  i think my upbringing is messing me up atm.

  Old man was/is a sub specialist looking after acute disease / end of life stuff. Emotion is completely out the window when it comes to care (shit needs to get done with a clear mind). I was on the phone from about 13yo speaking to these patients when he wasn’t home (which was a lot) and all I could do was listen to that fear. They just wanted someone to hear them (emotionally). Used to go on rounds with him and he has a very good bed side manner, but once out of the room back into get shit done mode.

  Seeing mum in her chair just staring at the ground depressed is heartbreaking. Asking me to read texts from buds is heartbreaking. Her telling me the old man hasn’t said a nice word since (he’s in doc mode) is rough. I’m sort of caught between being someone she can speak to with emotion, but then I have to switch my own on and off depending on what needs to happen. When you leave the room it’s a tidal wave of the realisation of a new reality for her.

  All my discussions with the old man are clinical (and it needs to be), but I can see a few cracks in his demeanour which is… unusual and… heartbreaking (and telling).

  I don’t really have hope that her vision will recover beyond where it is now. But flipping emotion on and off like this is something I’ve never done.

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  • Llabyrinthine@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Easier said than done, but you need to allow yourself the space to just be outside this dynamic. This is new territory for everyone and even for those that work in field. We can think or imagine how we’re going to respond or handle something like, but the truth is we never know until we in the moment.

    I hope that you have people close where you can express this. It might also not be what your father wants to hear right now, but it sounds like your mother needs him as a husband and not a doctor right now. The sooner he hears that, the better. She’s probably scared and she needs to feel like she is more than someone who needs to be treated. You know, patient centered care and being holistic and all that…

    Sending you the biggest hugs. Please talk to friends/loved ones/or other if you can.

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    • melbaboutown@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      He’s probably in clinical mode because he’s overwhelmed and feels he might not cope or be able to help otherwise

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  • Thornburywitch@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Heart goes out to you Racer. Navigating this will be a challenge for anyone. We are here for support and venting. There is still a chance that your mum will recover more than present situation too. Sending healing vibes.
    You’ll need to be there for your dad too - sounds like he might need someone to model how to be human/emotional too. Which is lot to ask but there’s not a chance in hell that he’ll seek outside professional advice methinks.

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  • Eagle@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    So many hugs. Healing is hard, and it takes a lot of time.

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  • Seagoon_@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    gees, so many hugs.

    You shouldn’t be doing this and in the past your dad shouldn’t have asked you to do that.

    I suggest getting a nurse or aid in to do a lot of that. Contact the hospital about organising one.

    and hugs again.

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  • just_kitten@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Mate, that’s definitely a lot to wear on your own. It’s a very delicate situation to navigate. I have absolutely nothing useful to add except that you’re an incredibly awesome human and as everyone else has said do talk to others about it (vent here, to a friend, a shrink…) You shouldn’t have to go through this alone. I hope this difficult time will eventually (even if painfully at first) bring forward some vulnerability and openness from all parties. Big hugs 🫂

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  • Gibsonhasafluffybutt@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    I’m sorry you’re having such a hard time mate. I was with my mother through her difficulties and you’re right, it is heartbreaking.

    It takes a real toll.

    I hope you get the best outcome possible ❤️

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  • anotherspringchicken@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    All the hugs… its such a tough situation to be going through, for everyone 💛

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  • melbaboutown@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    I just thought of something. Everything now is sleek and touch screens, but perhaps if you went for technology that was a bit older it would have buttons that your mum could feel so she could control it.

    You can get old iPod shuffles or generic mp3 players off eBay and they clip to clothing so she can’t drop and lose it. I did have a generic mp3 player that ran off a simple SD card but it had a hissing sound so ymmv.

    Mp3s of music can be ripped from cds and maybe even music and audiobooks downloaded from public domain sites like the Internet Archive. You might even be able to get cheeky and download something audio heavy from YouTube.

    There are also narrators built in to some operating systems and screen readers if that wasn’t good enough.

    I’m sorry, I’m not trying to be toxically positive or dismiss anybody’s emotions. This is terrifying to go through and I can’t imagine the sudden dependence she feels.

    I just thought to offer some options that might help with boredom/depression and allow her to choose activities for herself/control the device

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  • melbaboutown@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    I’m so sorry. Aged, end of life or disability care can be brutal especially when it’s your mum. Definitely get some carers in to help share the load

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• just_kitten@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  God bless chilled out movers. Everything went flawlessly and they were such nice guys yet efficient and professional. The perfect thing for one of life’s most stressful times.

  One more item gone on FBM, another one pending… LL has finally emailed to say how she wants the keys dropped off - thankfully the agency’s only a 15 min drive off peak from work, I could nip over during lunch and come back.

  Need to catch my breath a little and eat something… then time for more ferocious packing and loading shit into my car.

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  • imoldgreeeg@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Professional movers are the BEST…I never used them until I had to move at start of lockdown and it was the only choice and now I will scrimp and save and spend that money every time. I think they also love it when they only have a small move and you have taken the time to organise a bit.

    You are nearly there!!!

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    • just_kitten@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Yep, I could’ve had a heart attack from the stress when moving in, watching my friends try to lug this heavy-arse entertainment unit up 2 flights of stairs. Nearly slipped out of their hands, would’ve smashed their foot big time…

      This is my first time using pros, absolutely using them for the move out. Worth every cent. Some things are 100% worth paying for. Saves time, stress, damage, and the likelihood of injury!!

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• just_kitten@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  Used airtasker for the first time today. Damn this is useful and convenient! Listed The Couch of Doom to be removed for a pretty reasonable price and 4 offers within 45 minutes. Now booked in to be taken tonight by someone who seems really lovely and will actually use it too and not just take it to the tip. Sure the connection fee is pricey but the stress relief is monumental…

  I’ve put together everything that the movers need to take away now - just need to give the fridge and tv console a wipe down. Let’s hope to fuck that they can actually carry everything up to the new place with its narrow staircase, I will be fucked if they can’t fit it in (I guess airtasker to the rescue again to take stuff off the footpath asap 😂)

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  • RustyRaven@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Airtasker can be great like that - I did the same thing to get rid of a wine fridge that Marketplace buyers kept not showing up for. I’ve had a bit of weeding and gutter cleaning done via Airtasker too.

    Narrow staircases can be an issue, but movers can be pretty clever with stuff like that. I used to live in a flat above a shop which had an external spiral staircase up to a narrow landing to the door, the movers managed to get a neighbour’s double bed up the side of the shop below and lift it over the landing from the shop roof.

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• Gibsonhasafluffybutt@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  Image

  Sometimes I eat my dinner standing in the kitchen to avoid this exact scenario lol

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  • anotherspringchicken@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    In front of the tv AND has eyes on the dinner

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    • Gibsonhasafluffybutt@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      I just want to eat and watch Samurai Jack in peace lol

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  • Taleya@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Kissy kissy

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• danwritesbooks@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  I had a dream I failed a uni assignment. First one since I started this degree.

  So it has begun…the anxiety, the self doubts, the…troubles.

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• Thornburywitch@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  ABC news has a story that Alan Jones has been arrested on indecent assault charges spanning 20 years. About time.

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• LowExperience2368@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  Yesterday my dad called me a loser because I am underemployed right now. I am looking for another job that fits with the uni break, asking managers for more shifts, trying to better myself by actually having hobbies for once in my life and doing things with friends. Yeah, I still don’t wake up super early, and yeah, I’m not happy with my life either, but I feel like I’m getting somewhere, after years of fighting battles in my mind and making shitty decisions.

  Then you’ve got my twin sister who has had a full-time job even when she was studying, has a mortgage and her life is work, and she can get through each day without having to reassure herself that she’s going to be fine. Most people my age aren’t lucky enough to be in this position, but somehow this is the standard I’m expected to uphold. No one says it, but just by the way people in my life baby me around, I can tell that that’s the way they want me to be.

  / end vent with lots of cognitive distortions

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• CEOofmyhouse56@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  Yesterday I was in my lounge room and I heard water running so I cocked my head, went into the kitchen and realised FUCK ITS THE LAUNDRY. So I sprint in there and turn the tap off. My washing machine had sprung a leak. First thing i did was take off my socks because ick. Water everywhere. Luckily it didn’t reach the hallway carpet. Cleaned it up. There was swearing but atleast I know I run towards danger, didn’t panic and my hearing is still good.

  Good news is I defrosted my freezer so I get to pack it with frozen goods from Aldi today.

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• CEOofmyhouse56@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  I found an easy recipe for Golden Syrup Pudding. Oooo yeah.

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• SpinMeAround@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  So it’s no secret here that I’m on thin ice at work and work is on thin ice with me. I think that ice is going to crack on both sides when I ask for an extra week off after the Christmas break.

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• Gibsonhasafluffybutt@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  I’m going to try to squeeze one more day of leave from work. Considering I’m not taking a break over Xmas, I feel like 4 days of leave isn’t a huge deal.

  Let’s see what happens lol

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• SpinMeAround@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  I might have missed something - but anyone seen Bull lately? Is he still here under a different name?

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• Seagoon_@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  Hey

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• RustyRaven@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  Well, the assignment is done and submitted. It’s not very good. Hopefully it is enough to pass.

  I really have no interest/enthusiasm for this subject, but it is compulsory in the diploma. I guess I just see how I go half arsing it and if I fail try to kick myself into trying a bit harder next go around.

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• calhoon2005@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  I think I’ll be happy if I hear a few songs from Ten tonight to be honest.

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• Gibsonhasafluffybutt@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  OK so, if anyone knows the song: Something I can never have by Nine Inch Nails, is it a bit over the top for an open mic?

  I’m asking as it’s a fairly heavy song.

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• Llabyrinthine@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  Okay, scrambled eggs, coffee and overpriced spring water consumed.

  Please, please, please, heavy machinery be done when I get back.

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• RustyRaven@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  Righty ho. I’ve done the washing, vacuumed, done a thorough clean of the plate rack, been to the food market, cut up strawberries for the freezer and gone to the post office to deposit some cash. It might just be time to make a start on that assignment now…

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• CEOofmyhouse56@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  I always wanted a turkey baster and thanks to Aldi I now have one.

  Ps. When I typed in baster it automatically typed in bastard.

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• RustyRaven@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  I have an assignment due today that I haven’t even started, so I’m getting lots of cleaning done 🤣

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• Duenan@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  This hayfever i assume is kicking my ass today. Head and sinuses blocked up and sneezing all afternoon.

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• Seagoon_@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  i am so full of enthusiasm that I have to stop myself from starting everything at once.

  I’ll just start one new thing a week and let that become a new norm.

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• underwatermagpies@aussie.zone ⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  I’m eating After Dinner Mints before dinner like a proper rebel.

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