Hippos

Comments

• wesker@lemmy.sdf.org ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  Do these guys ever cease to be assholes?

  source

  • MisterNeon@lemmy.world ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Moo Dang is pretty cute.

    source

    • remer@lemmy.world ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      More like Poo Dang

      source

      • -> View More Comments
    • Assman@sh.itjust.works ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Moo deng probably gonna grow up and murder several people

      source

      • -> View More Comments
    • Fester@lemm.ee ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      True, but I still want to see the poop numbers just to be sure.

      source
  • Hammocks4All@lemmy.ml ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    I think they serve an important ecological function of pushing down marsh grass to better the flow of water. Or something like that.

    source

    • wesker@lemmy.sdf.org ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Well, lawyers also serve a useful purpose…

      source
• dohpaz42@lemmy.world ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  If I got my division order right, that’s about 5 lbs of shit per hippo per day (19841 % 4000). That’s probably a lot more than I shit each day.

  source

  • snapcatcher@discuss.tchncs.de ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    “probably”

    source

    • MonkeMischief@lemmy.today ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Depends how strong the espresso was. 😅

      source
  • Klear@lemmy.world ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Oh. I now realise I completely missed the “4000 hippos” part, but it didn’t feel strange to me because I’m so used to reading about dinosaurs.

    source
• Hammocks4All@lemmy.ml ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  Underwater chem trails

  source
• Kalkaline@leminal.space ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  Now compare that to factory farms and their manure run off.

  source

  • dohpaz42@lemmy.world ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Roughly 2.57632e9 lbs per day according to this report.

    U.S. factory farms are raising more animals than ever before. Together, the 1.7 billion confined animals produce an appalling 941 billion pounds of manure each year — double the weight in human sewage produced by the entire U.S. population.

    source

    • bdonvr@thelemmy.club ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      And much worse managed I bet

      source
  • TheTechnician27@lemmy.world ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    “Most people rejected his message” meme template from a Chick Tract

    source
• Monument@lemmy.sdf.org ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  But I bet their poop is great for growing the grasses they eat. It’s probably also really good for tourists, who it seems to attract and that they also eat.

  source

  • adavis@lemmy.world ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Hippos are herbivores. They only kill tourists for fun.

    source

    • Monument@lemmy.sdf.org ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      That’s ridiculous and was clearly shown to be false by my joke.

      Obviously, hippos evolved so their poop was irresistible to tourists. This is something my joke mentions to explain why hippos are always attacking tourists.

      source
    • TankovayaDiviziya@lemmy.world ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      You joke, but some animals are psychopaths. I remember a news years ago of a seal raping a penguin.

      /r/JustLikeUs

      source
    • eyes@lemmy.world ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      It’s important for their mental enrichment.

      source
• OpenStars@discuss.online ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  Truly the most dangerous species on earth! 🌎

  source

  • dohpaz42@lemmy.world ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    You’re forgetting humans.

    source

    • OpenStars@discuss.online ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Naw, I just knew that someone else would bring it up to fill in the gap:-).

      source

      • -> View More Comments
    • InverseParallax@lemmy.world ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Image

      source
    • TheTechnician27@lemmy.world ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      You’re forgetting mosquitos.

      source
• HootinNHollerin@lemmy.world ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  One way to say your ex is toxic

  source
• tenchiken@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  Me exiting the Taco Bell bathroom: “Notice me senpai!”

  source
• Utter_Karate@hexbear.net ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  Wait, that’s just 2.25 kg of dung per hippo. That sounds like way too little. I’m pretty sure a human being could produce 2.25 kg of dung in a day with the right team spirit and some elbow grease, but you’re telling me these dainty, bashful cowards can’t do better despite weighing so much more? Pathetic.

  source

  • Hammocks4All@lemmy.ml ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    I imagine they also poop on land

    source
  • Kecessa@sh.itjust.works ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    A guy on Reddit did take a shit for a month and a half and it finally came out weighting 9lbs, I don’t think you can do 5lbs on the regular…

    source

    • DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Interesting, my grandma once described giving birth as like pooping a bowling ball. That guy might actually somewhat understand the experience.

      source
  • jballs@sh.itjust.works ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    I just did the math and that’s the equivalent to a little more that 3 and a half Chipotle burritos. I can’t imagine trying to flush that down my toilet.

    source
• shasta@lemm.ee ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  What a bunch of lazy assholes. They could just as easily walk up on land and poop there. Do they like to stew in their own feces?

  source

  • blubfisch@discuss.tchncs.de ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    AFAIK they purposefully poop in the water to hide there. So yes, they “like” it.

    source
• dumpster_dove@hexbear.net ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  Which is why you need to keep your Hippo INDOORS

  source
• Guamer@hexbear.net ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  Big animals produce big shits

  source
• flora_explora@beehaw.org ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  They do it on purpose though:

  www.youtube.com/watch?v=6pibJ83crQs

  source
• NewDark@hexbear.net ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  For a second I thought that 9 ton amount was for a single hippo and was shocked.

  source
• Iheartcheese@lemmy.world ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  So we need to kill all the hippos?

  source