jballs
@jballs@sh.itjust.works
- Comment on Anon indulges 2 days ago:
That’s about 87 grams of sugar, which is about 3 times the recommended sugar daily intake for an adult male. Which roughly translates to, as bollybing put it, a beetus.
- Comment on Anon indulges 2 days ago:
That depends. How many gallons would you say you drink a day?
- Comment on Anon indulges 3 days ago:
This made me think of something that happened to a good friend of mine. He’s in his 50s and is one of the most healthy people I know in terms of diet and exercise.
He went to the doctor the other for a checkup. His doctor made an off the cuff remark about his cholesterol levels being normal, which was fine for a regular person by maybe a little concerning for a person with diabetes.
My friend was like “what do you mean for a person with diabetes?” and the doc responded “You didn’t know you had diabetes?”
They went through my friend’s diet to see what could be the cause. The conversation went like this:
Doc: Do you drink sugary drinks like soda?
Friend: Never.
Doc: What do you eat in a typical day?
Friend: Mostly rice and spinach. And beans too. Honestly I many days I forget to eat.
Doc: This doesn’t really check out. Are you sure there’s nothing else you’re eating or drinking?
Friend: Oh… I also usually drink about a gallon of orange juice a day.
So yeah … that’s the story of how my supposedly healthy friend gave himself diabetes by drinking a metric fuckton of OJ.
- Comment on Thankfully I deleted my account 1 week ago:
"Let’s test if anyone remembers: write down when, where and how we met each other, along with your mother’s maiden name and the make/model of the first car you ever owned :-)
- Comment on Must secure the castle 1 week ago:
Fuck all the cops who used to use my driveway to try and catch people speeding
Wtf that’s wild. I couldn’t imagine a cop setting up a speed trap in my driveway.
- Comment on May the 4th be with you 1 week ago:
I booked tickets for opening day to see it after work. I was browsing /all before the show and /r/4chan had tagged all their posts “Kylo Ren kills Han Solo, his father”.
Those fuckers.
- Comment on What would this list look like for your generation? 2 weeks ago:
Had to look this up: www.tiktok.com/…/7440554144097668395?lang=en
Seems like Darius is a guy with autism that makes noises on TikTok. His caretaker (mother?) seems to think it’s healthy to express himself and let off energy.
- Comment on Lest you scar yourself for life 2 weeks ago:
Lol nope, it was just an unlabeled camcorder tape. There’s a lesson to be learned here, which is be careful with unlabeled tapes. Hope you don’t find anything similar on your mom’s tapes!
- Comment on Yep 3 weeks ago:
- Comment on Lest you scar yourself for life 3 weeks ago:
Think of this from our perspective. We are two teenage boys. We find a hidden tape. We don’t know what’s on it. What’s the next logical move?
Or if you’re saying once the guy in the tape does his intro, what are you saying you’d do differently? Are you saying you’d send your brother out of the room so you could watch the tape of the guy jacking off by yourself? Cause that’s weird as fuck dude.
- Comment on Lest you scar yourself for life 3 weeks ago:
I reminded my brother of this and he responded youtu.be/reNvytfN820
- Comment on Lest you scar yourself for life 3 weeks ago:
Growing up, my brother and I found a camcorder tape hidden in the basement of the house we moved into like 6 months prior. We had to buy a mini tape to VHS converter so we could play the thing on our VCR.
It was a tape of some young dude in the our (now) basement going “this is going to be a video showing you how to make love to beautiful women.”
Me and my brother were like “hell yeah!” Then the guy in the video goes “but before you make love, you have to learn to love yourself.”
The entire video was then just this dude jacking off. We were so mad we went out of our way to buy a VHS converter just to watch this dude beating his meat. There were no beautiful women to be found.
- Comment on Google is excited about money! 4 weeks ago:
Edited for clarity:
Back in my day we used our phone plan money to pay for google play purchases / hand jobs.
- Comment on Make gravity your bitch 4 weeks ago:
Exactly. Raise your hand. Great, you overcame gravity for a second. Keep your hand raised for a minute. 10 minutes. An hour. Fuck, gravity doesn’t stop. It’s exactly like us.
- Comment on Anon makes life choices 5 weeks ago:
I was trying to explain this to my son yesterday. He’s in middle school but already has a career path picked out. I was like, “dude, I didn’t even know my current job existed until a decade after I graduated from college, you don’t have to have this all figured out yet. Plans change, life gets in the way. Just go with it.”
- Comment on [deleted] 5 weeks ago:
I assume it’s purely for her to get US citizenship. She posts lots of thirst trap pictures on Instagram.
- Comment on [deleted] 5 weeks ago:
My divorced 43 year old friend just did this. He’s got a smoking hot 21 year old Filipino fiance. It’s weird as fuck.
- Comment on SPIRIT WEAPON 5 weeks ago:
And then if she chooses the cheesy pickup line:
Girl, are you made of iron and animal bones? Because you’ve got all the elements to forge a bond stronger than a Viking axe.
- Comment on SPIRIT WEAPON 5 weeks ago:
Jokes on her. The recipe is iron and animal bones to make a sweet axe.
- Comment on The Ring is a lot cuter than I remember 5 weeks ago:
I saw The Ring in the theater and people legit freaked the fuck out when she came out of the screen. One person straight up got up and ran out.
- Comment on Anon orders food 5 weeks ago:
Lol
“I want to destroy your dick,” SJ Son whispers into the ear of an unknown man as she walks by.
Yeah 99% of dudes I know would be ecstatic to hear a woman whisper that to them on the street.
- Comment on shrimp colour drama 5 weeks ago:
If you love the old murder mystery games like the Laura Bow Mystery Series, you will enjoy this game
Oh man, I had completely forgotten about the old Laura Bow games! Might have to check this out!
- Comment on shrimp colour drama 5 weeks ago:
- Comment on I'm just happy you thought it was funny, dear 1 month ago:
The not shitting guy came before the beans. The beans was mindless. The not shitting guy was an enigma.
- Comment on Here's one more for you 🐸 2 months ago:
I was searching for Macho Man gifs the other day to send to friend. I made the mistake in doing it in Chrome and not in an incognito window. Now my algorithms serve up a constant stream of WWE content. Figure it’ll take a couple weeks to go back to normal.
- Comment on Starbucks continues to be terrible 2 months ago:
I’m theory, the board of directors is supposed to keep a CEO in check if they do something that is against the best interest of the shareholders. But the share price actually went up after he made this move.
Same reason share prices often go up when a company announces layoffs. The market isn’t always tied to how well a business is run.
- Comment on Moo Deng has had enough 2 months ago:
What’s that watermark in the bottom right?
- Comment on Starbucks continues to be terrible 2 months ago:
Of course that wasn’t the official reason he gave. He hired a management consultant group to do a study of where all the top restaurant talent was in the country. Surprise, surprise, all the criteria they were given led them to narrow down the ideal location for the corporate headquarters to be right next to his house in Newport Beach.
- Comment on Starbucks continues to be terrible 2 months ago:
That was just the 400 FTEs. There were also lost of contractors that were affected as well! Most people don’t count them since they could have been let go for any reason.
- Comment on Starbucks continues to be terrible 2 months ago:
Yeah, same guy who fired nearly everyone at the Chipotle corporate office in Denver so he didn’t have to commute.
