jballs
@jballs@sh.itjust.works
- Comment on lik lik lik 5 days ago:
Wtf is a yiff? You know what, never mind.
- Comment on Dear Leader 5 days ago:
Same in the US.
- Comment on Too wordy a shitpost? 6 days ago:
Murphy’s Cat is my favorite
- Comment on A true horror 1 week ago:
Yeah Facebook was vastly different back in the day. Instead of having a shadowy algorithm deciding which posts to show you, you just got a chronological view of all your friends’ posts. So during major events, you’d usually see lots of posts that taken out of context make absolutely no sense.
When Facebook moved to them deciding what you wanted to see, it completely changed the whole vibe.
- Comment on AGI achieved 🤖 2 weeks ago:
I’m going to hell for laughing at that
- Comment on We really did 2 weeks ago:
We drive across the country every summer to visit family. Growing up, my parents used to talk about different routes and which one felt faster. Like “you can get off the interstate and take this county road and shave some time off.” But then they’d argue about if it was worth taking a road with a lower speed limit even if it was less distance.
Eventually they tried to impart that wisdom to me and would ask “so which route are you taking?” It took years for them to finally grasp that I just go whatever the way the GPS tells me is faster.
- Comment on Guaranteed Casting 2 weeks ago:
Plus they get the added bonus of filling all the American roles in Chinese-made films.
- Comment on Baldur's Gayte 2 weeks ago:
I remember thinking this was too notch graphics in 1992.
- Comment on Baldur's Gayte 2 weeks ago:
You’re the Internet?
- Comment on We don't have 2 weeks ago:
Lol had to look this up because it’s complicated.
flo.health/pregnancy/…/how-long-is-pregnancy
“Ovulation [when an egg is released from your ovaries ready for fertilization] typically takes place around two weeks after the first day of your last period, and this is when a baby would be conceived. But because you won’t know that you’re pregnant until you’ve missed your next period, approximately two weeks later, you’ll already be four weeks pregnant when you get your positive test result. At that point, you’ll have approximately 36 more weeks to go,” Dr. Celestine says.
So pregnancies typically last 10 months, but we say 9 months since you don’t even know you’re pregnant until you’re 4 weeks pregnant. But anti-abortion laws still count that 4 weeks.
- Comment on We don't have 2 weeks ago:
But doesn’t the 9 months of pregnancy technically start on the first day since a woman’s last period? That’s what makes anti-abortion laws even more absurd, because you can be 8 weeks pregnant if you only had sex 5 weeks ago.
- Comment on how do they come up with this seriously 2 weeks ago:
Fake: Anon leaves his apartment to talk to a woman
Gay: Anon is knocked to the group and surrounded by the Triad - clearly some fucked up bukkake fantasy.
- Comment on Living a lie 3 weeks ago:
It’s always a shock to me when I interact with someone providing customer service that is t using a customer service voice.
I was checking into a hotel (a large chain too) a while back and the person checking me in was having some trouble. She goes “sorry, this system is just retarded some times.”
I actually laughed out loud because it caught me so off guard.
- Comment on [deleted] 3 weeks ago:
Seriously, sounds like OP is in an abusive relationship.
- Comment on No context needed. 3 weeks ago:
Yeah feel like there is some context needed. Is OP pissing and shitting in that sink?
- Comment on work is easy 3 weeks ago:
Lol glad you enjoyed it. These fake/gay green text comments are probably well past being socially acceptable at this point, but I always get a kick out of them.
- Comment on FFFFFUUUUUUUU 3 weeks ago:
I remember legitimately thinking rage comics were hilarious back in like 2012. Now I look at them like “wtf was I thinking?”
I can’t even blame it on being young. I was in my 30s then!
- Comment on This entire community 3 weeks ago:
Lol is this a cross post from the same community? Well played.
- Comment on do you think freewill truly exists? 3 weeks ago:
Exactly. I can’t remember where I heard this - it might have been a podcast like RadioLab or something else - but it was talking about how happily married, intelligent couples talk to each other .
It turns out, it’s not usually super deep, intelligent conversations. The vast majority of conversations are just meaningless bullshit. Most of the time, couples aren’t even really talking to each other, but they’re just kind of thinking aloud. Stupid stuff like, “I swear I saw a dozen blue Volkswagens today.”
It turns out that people who are comfortable with each other don’t need to have deep conversations all the time. They can just relax, unwind, and be themselves.
- Comment on Anon measures up 3 weeks ago:
Fake: Anon has sex with a woman
Gay: Anon started this whole thread just to get guys to talk about dicks.
- Comment on Anon discovers cigarettes 4 weeks ago:
Elementary school always warned us that people would offer us free drugs. This whole time, people have joked that no one is going around giving away free cocaine and heroin. Turns out, it was cigarettes they were trying to warn us about
- Comment on work is easy 4 weeks ago:
Fake: Anon has a friend and participates in social activities.
Gay: Anon comes out of the closet to his boss.
- Comment on We're deep into the baggy era mate 4 weeks ago:
I remember in 8th grade, my buddy got the first pair of JNCOs in our friend group. He was so excited, he goes “AND JUST LOOK WHAT I CAN FIT IN THE POCKETS!” and proceeded to pull out an entire 2-liter bottle of Mountain Dew.
- Comment on Aggressive negotiations 4 weeks ago:
You’re outta your mind. Chili-cheese Fritos are fucking amazing.
- Comment on Breakup 4 weeks ago:
I NEVER LIKED THAT PIECE OF SHIT!
…
Oh, you’re getting back together?
- Comment on True wisdom 5 weeks ago:
Especially if you’re laid up for a while afterwards.
- Comment on I'm baffled 5 weeks ago:
It goes like this: 0.25, 0.20
- Comment on Anon indulges 1 month ago:
That’s about 87 grams of sugar, which is about 3 times the recommended sugar daily intake for an adult male. Which roughly translates to, as bollybing put it, a beetus.
- Comment on Anon indulges 1 month ago:
That depends. How many gallons would you say you drink a day?
- Comment on Anon indulges 1 month ago:
This made me think of something that happened to a good friend of mine. He’s in his 50s and is one of the most healthy people I know in terms of diet and exercise.
He went to the doctor the other for a checkup. His doctor made an off the cuff remark about his cholesterol levels being normal, which was fine for a regular person by maybe a little concerning for a person with diabetes.
My friend was like “what do you mean for a person with diabetes?” and the doc responded “You didn’t know you had diabetes?”
They went through my friend’s diet to see what could be the cause. The conversation went like this:
Doc: Do you drink sugary drinks like soda?
Friend: Never.
Doc: What do you eat in a typical day?
Friend: Mostly rice and spinach. And beans too. Honestly I many days I forget to eat.
Doc: This doesn’t really check out. Are you sure there’s nothing else you’re eating or drinking?
Friend: Oh… I also usually drink about a gallon of orange juice a day.
So yeah … that’s the story of how my supposedly healthy friend gave himself diabetes by drinking a metric fuckton of OJ.
