jballs
@jballs@sh.itjust.works
- Comment on Living a lie 2 days ago:
It’s always a shock to me when I interact with someone providing customer service that is t using a customer service voice.
I was checking into a hotel (a large chain too) a while back and the person checking me in was having some trouble. She goes “sorry, this system is just retarded some times.”
I actually laughed out loud because it caught me so off guard.
- Comment on [deleted] 4 days ago:
Seriously, sounds like OP is in an abusive relationship.
- Comment on No context needed. 6 days ago:
Yeah feel like there is some context needed. Is OP pissing and shitting in that sink?
- Comment on work is easy 6 days ago:
Lol glad you enjoyed it. These fake/gay green text comments are probably well past being socially acceptable at this point, but I always get a kick out of them.
- Comment on FFFFFUUUUUUUU 6 days ago:
I remember legitimately thinking rage comics were hilarious back in like 2012. Now I look at them like “wtf was I thinking?”
I can’t even blame it on being young. I was in my 30s then!
- Comment on This entire community 6 days ago:
Lol is this a cross post from the same community? Well played.
- Comment on do you think freewill truly exists? 6 days ago:
Exactly. I can’t remember where I heard this - it might have been a podcast like RadioLab or something else - but it was talking about how happily married, intelligent couples talk to each other .
It turns out, it’s not usually super deep, intelligent conversations. The vast majority of conversations are just meaningless bullshit. Most of the time, couples aren’t even really talking to each other, but they’re just kind of thinking aloud. Stupid stuff like, “I swear I saw a dozen blue Volkswagens today.”
It turns out that people who are comfortable with each other don’t need to have deep conversations all the time. They can just relax, unwind, and be themselves.
- Comment on Anon measures up 1 week ago:
Fake: Anon has sex with a woman
Gay: Anon started this whole thread just to get guys to talk about dicks.
- Comment on Anon discovers cigarettes 1 week ago:
Elementary school always warned us that people would offer us free drugs. This whole time, people have joked that no one is going around giving away free cocaine and heroin. Turns out, it was cigarettes they were trying to warn us about
- Comment on work is easy 1 week ago:
Fake: Anon has a friend and participates in social activities.
Gay: Anon comes out of the closet to his boss.
- Comment on We're deep into the baggy era mate 1 week ago:
I remember in 8th grade, my buddy got the first pair of JNCOs in our friend group. He was so excited, he goes “AND JUST LOOK WHAT I CAN FIT IN THE POCKETS!” and proceeded to pull out an entire 2-liter bottle of Mountain Dew.
- Comment on Aggressive negotiations 1 week ago:
You’re outta your mind. Chili-cheese Fritos are fucking amazing.
- Comment on Breakup 1 week ago:
I NEVER LIKED THAT PIECE OF SHIT!
…
Oh, you’re getting back together?
- Comment on True wisdom 2 weeks ago:
Especially if you’re laid up for a while afterwards.
- Comment on I'm baffled 2 weeks ago:
It goes like this: 0.25, 0.20
- Comment on Anon indulges 3 weeks ago:
That’s about 87 grams of sugar, which is about 3 times the recommended sugar daily intake for an adult male. Which roughly translates to, as bollybing put it, a beetus.
- Comment on Anon indulges 3 weeks ago:
That depends. How many gallons would you say you drink a day?
- Comment on Anon indulges 3 weeks ago:
This made me think of something that happened to a good friend of mine. He’s in his 50s and is one of the most healthy people I know in terms of diet and exercise.
He went to the doctor the other for a checkup. His doctor made an off the cuff remark about his cholesterol levels being normal, which was fine for a regular person by maybe a little concerning for a person with diabetes.
My friend was like “what do you mean for a person with diabetes?” and the doc responded “You didn’t know you had diabetes?”
They went through my friend’s diet to see what could be the cause. The conversation went like this:
Doc: Do you drink sugary drinks like soda?
Friend: Never.
Doc: What do you eat in a typical day?
Friend: Mostly rice and spinach. And beans too. Honestly I many days I forget to eat.
Doc: This doesn’t really check out. Are you sure there’s nothing else you’re eating or drinking?
Friend: Oh… I also usually drink about a gallon of orange juice a day.
So yeah … that’s the story of how my supposedly healthy friend gave himself diabetes by drinking a metric fuckton of OJ.
- Comment on Thankfully I deleted my account 3 weeks ago:
"Let’s test if anyone remembers: write down when, where and how we met each other, along with your mother’s maiden name and the make/model of the first car you ever owned :-)
- Comment on Must secure the castle 4 weeks ago:
Fuck all the cops who used to use my driveway to try and catch people speeding
Wtf that’s wild. I couldn’t imagine a cop setting up a speed trap in my driveway.
- Comment on May the 4th be with you 4 weeks ago:
I booked tickets for opening day to see it after work. I was browsing /all before the show and /r/4chan had tagged all their posts “Kylo Ren kills Han Solo, his father”.
Those fuckers.
- Comment on What would this list look like for your generation? 5 weeks ago:
Had to look this up: www.tiktok.com/…/7440554144097668395?lang=en
Seems like Darius is a guy with autism that makes noises on TikTok. His caretaker (mother?) seems to think it’s healthy to express himself and let off energy.
- Comment on Lest you scar yourself for life 5 weeks ago:
Lol nope, it was just an unlabeled camcorder tape. There’s a lesson to be learned here, which is be careful with unlabeled tapes. Hope you don’t find anything similar on your mom’s tapes!
- Comment on Yep 5 weeks ago:
- Comment on Lest you scar yourself for life 1 month ago:
Think of this from our perspective. We are two teenage boys. We find a hidden tape. We don’t know what’s on it. What’s the next logical move?
Or if you’re saying once the guy in the tape does his intro, what are you saying you’d do differently? Are you saying you’d send your brother out of the room so you could watch the tape of the guy jacking off by yourself? Cause that’s weird as fuck dude.
- Comment on Lest you scar yourself for life 1 month ago:
I reminded my brother of this and he responded youtu.be/reNvytfN820
- Comment on Lest you scar yourself for life 1 month ago:
Growing up, my brother and I found a camcorder tape hidden in the basement of the house we moved into like 6 months prior. We had to buy a mini tape to VHS converter so we could play the thing on our VCR.
It was a tape of some young dude in the our (now) basement going “this is going to be a video showing you how to make love to beautiful women.”
Me and my brother were like “hell yeah!” Then the guy in the video goes “but before you make love, you have to learn to love yourself.”
The entire video was then just this dude jacking off. We were so mad we went out of our way to buy a VHS converter just to watch this dude beating his meat. There were no beautiful women to be found.
- Comment on Google is excited about money! 1 month ago:
Edited for clarity:
Back in my day we used our phone plan money to pay for google play purchases / hand jobs.
- Comment on Make gravity your bitch 1 month ago:
Exactly. Raise your hand. Great, you overcame gravity for a second. Keep your hand raised for a minute. 10 minutes. An hour. Fuck, gravity doesn’t stop. It’s exactly like us.
- Comment on Anon makes life choices 1 month ago:
I was trying to explain this to my son yesterday. He’s in middle school but already has a career path picked out. I was like, “dude, I didn’t even know my current job existed until a decade after I graduated from college, you don’t have to have this all figured out yet. Plans change, life gets in the way. Just go with it.”