Submitted 4 months ago by late_night@sopuli.xyz to memes@sopuli.xyz
https://sopuli.xyz/pictrs/image/19015583-e9f7-4e80-a963-5291375449c6.webp
Remember the days before automated voice shit? Where you’d just spam “0” until it connected you with a rep?
It was so easy!
Now, it’s I NEED to direct you to the right department. Did you want to pay your bill? If so say YES if not say: Something else.
Whoever designed that system—straight to hell.
Sometimes 0 still works, sometimes it crashes the system and hangs up.
Yep. There are a few where you can press star a few times in a row and get a person because the system is set up for accessibility.
Unfortunately there’s no mandated way that systems have to implement this so it doesn’t work on all of them. Sometimes you have to try several things.
Sometimes you can mash # or * to get to a person! Sometimes it also hangs up so it’s pretty hit or miss
I personally just start a long monologue of swearing at whatever dumbfuck thought it was a good idea to make an AI answer the phone.
Then I am extremely pleasant to the human when they pick-up.
They generally record and log every call, so I give the human reviewer something to enjoy.
It’s not even AI.
This garbage started in the 90s,and has never worked right.
I really hate the modern trend of having the stupid thing pop out some random name hoping you don’t notice that it’s a computer.
Cursing doesn’t work as well as it did a few years back, but I try it on the chance it does! I Hulk out on the robot and then turn Bruce Banner on the rep.
“I want to speak to a human you stupid fucking machine.”
“Oh hi Steve, thank you so much for taking my call…”
Fun fact, a lot of these systems are set up to detect what a customer gets angry and starts yelling and swearing into the phone, and then expediting them to a person. Do with that what you want.
This is my go to. Just swear at it til I get someone
Some versions of that system will detect frustration and connect you to a representative, so if you just swear at it a few times, you get into the human queue immediately.
So it’s not just me. Good to know.
“agent”
Agent Smith: “Hello, Mr Anderson.”
HUMAN HUMAN HUMAN HUMAN
Juat swear the ai will detect it and redirect you almost immediately.
“Did you say ‘make a payment’?”
####**##
Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 4 months ago
You’re doing it wrong. You’re supposed to say
“Blrahkystkoicsu”
“I’m sorry, I didn’t understand, can you say the reason for your call?”
“Blarkvgjstklbftk!!!”
“I’m sorry, I didn’t understand, can you say the reason for your call?”
“BLAFRHDYDKJKSTKLV!!!”
“I seem to be having issue understanding you. Please stand by as I connect you with someone who can help.”
Fuck you AI!
wander1236@sh.itjust.works 4 months ago
I’m pretty sure that first one is just Polish
Etterra@lemmy.world 4 months ago
As a Chicago woman I can say that you are incorrect. There are a lot of Ks and Ws in Polish, which are absent in the example. That word is definitely German.
Grilipper54@sh.itjust.works 4 months ago
I tried doing something similar to this years ago with Verizon. Finally the automated messaged just said " I am unable to understand your request, goodbye"
I thought it was the funniest yet most irritating thing at the time.
Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 4 months ago
On verizon I use the keypad. I still remember the options menu from before.
They tried shutting me out of it. So I started paying in cash at a store for 6 months. Now they have to be responsible for taking that money to the bank. Suddenly the next time I called, the keypad menu worked again.
Funny how that works.
dingus@lemmy.world 4 months ago
I had something like this before as well! I kept asking the robot to be connected to a representative. And at the end it just said it couldn’t help me and hung up!! Dude I was so pissed.
Etterra@lemmy.world 4 months ago
I wonder what would happen if you kept telling it different languages every time it forwarded you to a different language AI.
Iheartcheese@lemmy.world 4 months ago
A lot of them just hang up on you