Linux just works until it doesn't
Submitted 14 hours ago by GreenDust@lemmings.world to [deleted]
https://lemmings.world/pictrs/image/835cdbeb-f3fd-42b9-8467-8fe280f05aa8.jpeg
Comments
Redjard@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 hours ago
Toes@ani.social 14 hours ago
Time to switch to bsd.
thisbenzingring@lemmy.today 14 hours ago
then straight on to the S&M and furrycon
WalrusDragonOnABike@reddthat.com 13 hours ago
Probably makes more sense to gay on to the furrycon. Are straights even allowed in such hallowed grounds? (no offense to straight furries intended by the comment - just not sure I’ve ever met a furry that wasn’t at least some form of GSRM)
aeronmelon@lemmy.world 13 hours ago
circuitfarmer@lemmy.sdf.org 13 hours ago
This guy fucks
SatansMaggotyCumFart@piefed.world 11 hours ago
I believe one of those two statements.
yesman@lemmy.world 14 hours ago
This works on libertarians too.
W98BSoD@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 hours ago
Libertarian police
I was shooting heroin and reading “The Fountainhead” in the front seat of my privately owned police cruiser when a call came in. I put a quarter in the radio to activate it. It was the chief.
“Bad news, detective. We got a situation.”
“What? Is the mayor trying to ban trans fats again?”
“Worse. Somebody just stole four hundred and forty-seven million dollars’ worth of bitcoins.”
The heroin needle practically fell out of my arm. “What kind of monster would do something like that? Bitcoins are the ultimate currency: virtual, anonymous, stateless. They represent true economic freedom, not subject to arbitrary manipulation by any government. Do we have any leads?”
“Not yet. But mark my words: we’re going to figure out who did this and we’re going to take them down … provided someone pays us a fair market rate to do so.”
“Easy, chief,” I said. “Any rate the market offers is, by definition, fair.”
He laughed. “That’s why you’re the best I got, Lisowski. Now you get out there and find those bitcoins.”
“Don’t worry,” I said. “I’m on it.”
I put a quarter in the siren. Ten minutes later, I was on the scene. It was a normal office building, strangled on all sides by public sidewalks. I hopped over them and went inside.
“Home Depot™ Presents the Police!®” I said, flashing my badge and my gun and a small picture of Ron Paul. “Nobody move unless you want to!” They didn’t.
“Now, which one of you punks is going to pay me to investigate this crime?” No one spoke up.
“Come on,” I said. “Don’t you all understand that the protection of private property is the foundation of all personal liberty?”
It didn’t seem like they did.
“Seriously, guys. Without a strong economic motivator, I’m just going to stand here and not solve this case. Cash is fine, but I prefer being paid in gold bullion or autographed Penn Jillette posters.”
Nothing. These people were stonewalling me. It almost seemed like they didn’t care that a fortune in computer money invented to buy drugs was missing.
I figured I could wait them out. I lit several cigarettes indoors. A pregnant lady coughed, and I told her that secondhand smoke is a myth. Just then, a man in glasses made a break for it.
“Subway™ Eat Fresh and Freeze, Scumbag!®” I yelled.
Too late. He was already out the front door. I went after him.
“Stop right there!” I yelled as I ran. He was faster than me because I always try to avoid stepping on public sidewalks. Our country needs a private-sidewalk voucher system, but, thanks to the incestuous interplay between our corrupt federal government and the public-sidewalk lobby, it will never happen.
I was losing him. “Listen, I’ll pay you to stop!” I yelled. “What would you consider an appropriate price point for stopping? I’ll offer you a thirteenth of an ounce of gold and a gently worn ‘Bob Barr ‘08’ extra-large long-sleeved men’s T-shirt!”
He turned. In his hand was a revolver that the Constitution said he had every right to own. He fired at me and missed. I pulled my own gun, put a quarter in it, and fired back. The bullet lodged in a U.S.P.S. mailbox less than a foot from his head. I shot the mailbox again, on purpose.
“All right, all right!” the man yelled, throwing down his weapon. “I give up, cop! I confess: I took the bitcoins.”
“Why’d you do it?” I asked, as I slapped a pair of Oikos™ Greek Yogurt Presents Handcuffs® on the guy.
“Because I was afraid.”
“Afraid?”
“Afraid of an economic future free from the pernicious meddling of central bankers,” he said. “I’m a central banker.”
I wanted to coldcock the guy. Years ago, a central banker killed my partner. Instead, I shook my head.
“Let this be a message to all your central-banker friends out on the street,” I said. “No matter how many bitcoins you steal, you’ll never take away the dream of an open society based on the principles of personal and economic freedom.”
He nodded, because he knew I was right. Then he swiped his credit card to pay me.
loweffortname@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 hours ago
This copy-pasta reimagined as a comic: www.mattbors.com/justicewarriors
bennypr0fane@discuss.tchncs.de 13 hours ago
They stop working when you have sex?
umbrella@lemmy.ml 5 hours ago
mainly ancaps
gray@lemmy.ml 14 hours ago
This is so funny, I wish virginity was real
SuperNovaStar@lemmy.blahaj.zone 14 hours ago
Why would you wish for that
gustofwind@lemmy.world 14 hours ago
Everything in life has an exactly 50% chance of occurring or not
Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 6 hours ago
Man…I am so unlucky! I’ve played the lotto at LEAST 10 times now, and I’m STILL not a billionaire!
gustofwind@lemmy.world 6 hours ago
Try again
You’ll either win or lose and that’s p good odds
It’s not called the idiot tax for nothing
Gork@sopuli.xyz 13 hours ago
Skill issue.
umbrella@lemmy.ml 13 hours ago
time to get a mac and an instagram account.
Diplomjodler3@lemmy.world 14 hours ago
You should try Mint.
Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 6 hours ago
…why? Does my breath stink?
Bhaelfur@lemmy.world 14 hours ago
Just gotta dive in the configs, bro. Look for
linux.works=doesnotand change that tolinux.works=does. Kids these days, I’m shaking my head smhYoSoySnekBoi@kbin.earth 13 hours ago
Dude
linux.workswas deprecated a few kernel versions ago in favor ofgnu-linux-x86_64-kernel.does_bootto avoid ambiguity and ensure nobody knows what the hell they're doing anymoreJust RTFM smh
This post is about gccmarcos@lemmy.world 12 hours ago
But what I do if I’m using a Raspberry Pi?