Yo have different personalities for each of your friends? Thats exhausting. I have the same one for all of mine. Everyone gets a version of Eda the owl lady that swears a lot.
Eep
Submitted 1 day ago by LadyButterfly@piefed.blahaj.zone to memes@sopuli.xyz
https://piefed.cdn.blahaj.zone/posts/tH/2Z/tH2Z23qBORpv2Ia.jpg
Comments
muusemuuse@sh.itjust.works 6 hours ago
Dalkor@lemmy.world 5 minutes ago
I used to, but i slowly just merged them all into one. It was exhausting.
Earthman_Jim@lemmy.zip 1 day ago
Is this a sign of autism, or just normal people stuff? My friend wants to know.
NannerBanner@literature.cafe 5 hours ago
Mostly normal. There is some good research and theory about the topic out there. They refer to the trait as ‘self-monitoring’ and rank people as high or low in the trait. High self-monitors are “alert to social cues that suggest what they should do, and they are ready, willing, and able to tailor their behavior to fit in… low self-monitors are both less attentive to social norms and less flexible.”
High self monitors are activity specialists, who have friends for specific things, like a “ballet friend” or “tennis buddy,” and they avoid disputable topics.
There are a few trends that can be seen, with the high self-monitors having higher intimacy in relationships to start, but the relationships are less committed and shorter.
Some papers to look at: Nezlek & Leary, 2002; Fuglestad & Snyder, 2009; Leone & Hawkins, 2006; Snyder & Simpson, 1984; Wright et al., 2007). Quotes from Miller, 2012
TheTechnician27@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Everyone wears different masks around different groups of people. Autism can amplify social problems, but everyone to some degree has experienced the image in the OP.
Trying to ascribe specific behaviors to autism might not be healthy, especially absent a formal diagnosis or a reason to think knowing whether it’s autism could help you deal with it in some way.
I feel sometimes like people treat autism as a pseudo-horoscope where just about anything can signify it. In reality, adult diagnosis of autism is very difficult for even professionals. Not only do autism symptoms tend to present less strongly in adulthood, but in addition to screening you, the neuropsychologist – as it’s a pervasive developmental disorder –will often ask to speak to someone like a family member who knew you when you were young. If it didn’t present in childhood, it’s definitionally not autism. Symptoms can get really fuzzy in adulthood in no small part because 18 years is a long time to learn how to act more neurotypical.
That’s not saying “ignore it and move on”. Introspecting like this can sometimes reveal broad behavioral patterns you didn’t notice or thought nothing of. Just keep in mind that autism is generally more complicated than something you can poll and ask “is this an autism?”
db2@lemmy.world 18 hours ago
Everyone wears different masks around different groups of people.
Speak for yourself, that sounds like way too much effort for minimal payout, especially considering how many of them are transitory.
blackbrook@mander.xyz 17 hours ago
FWIW masking is also associated with ADHD.
WhyIHateTheInternet@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Tell your friend to just be who they are and not worry what people think and those left hanging around are the people who love them and not the person they try to be. Which is way more fulfilling and less exhausting than trying to be the person others want them to be.
thisisbutaname@discuss.tchncs.de 1 day ago
Vitangelo Moscarda discovers, by way of a completely irrelevant question that his wife poses to him, that everyone he knows, indeed everyone he has ever met, has constructed a Vitangelo persona in their own imagination and that none of these personas corresponds to the image of Vitangelo that he himself has constructed and believes himself to be.
loaf@sh.itjust.works 23 hours ago
Thank you for giving me a new book to read. This sounds incredibly interesting.
trolololol@lemmy.world 7 hours ago
Oh most of his work seems to be in public domain.
I can see many old translations to many languages, however the only place I can find them is Anna’s archive. For example they have editions made by epublibre, but epublibre itself is down.
RVGamer06@sh.itjust.works 22 hours ago
I kind of expected a Pirandello reference here.
reev@sh.itjust.works 22 hours ago
davidgro@lemmy.world 23 hours ago
Huh. To me that seems like it’s either trivially true or it’s nonsense, depending on definitions.
Of course nobody knows anybody 100% - especially not oneself. So each person gets a different view, with slightly different facts and assumptions about each other.
But on the other hand, strong or important personality traits tend to be noticeable after spending just a few minutes with a person.
ButteryMonkey@piefed.social 20 hours ago
Interesting. Now that I think of it, I don’t think I really have different personalities with different people. I don’t have that much energy. I might be more outgoing with some groups than others, but that’s a matter of volume rather than a different tune. Maybe that’s why people keep saying I’m “genuine”?
0ops@piefed.zip 13 hours ago
I don’t have different personalities with different people, but I definitely use different filters
vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.works 7 hours ago
The swearing will lower when my kin and boss are present. If not the swearing will be continue until the paint is stripped.
rhymeswithduck@sh.itjust.works 14 hours ago
It’s not so much a whole different personality, but I certainly show a completely different side of myself to my parents than with my friends. I’ve noticed that there are some people with strong personalities who seem to treat everyone the same way no matter what. I’m the opposite. I don’t have the same relationship with any two people; I negotiate boundaries with people individually. In a mixed group setting, that can become real tricky to keep track of. Not sure if this is a neurodivergent thing but I would guess so.
NannerBanner@literature.cafe 5 hours ago
I negotiate boundaries with people individually.
Yeah, I think you nailed it there. I am perfectly happy talking about certain parts of my life with certain individuals, while completely walling off those parts with others.
some_kind_of_guy@lemmy.world 5 hours ago
I sometimes feel almost “locked in” to being a certain way with certain people, it can get bad. It can also be wonderful. I think it’s just the way my brain interacts with other neurologies.
slazer2au@lemmy.world 22 hours ago
Or you make a new one for when they get together.
sorrybookbroke@sh.itjust.works 1 day ago
Pick the most professional one and the weirdos will either get it, or notice you’re acting quite different and you can explain the others aren’t nearly as cool later.
Or pick the strangest and see whose really worth hanging out witg
humanamerican@lemmy.zip 5 hours ago
I have been using option 2 for a few years now and I’m never going back