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Anon makes a deal with a demon

⁨649⁩ ⁨likes⁩

Submitted ⁨⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩ by ⁨Early_To_Risa@sh.itjust.works⁩ to ⁨greentext@sh.itjust.works⁩

https://sh.itjust.works/pictrs/image/fa39f359-97b2-42a9-b9c4-a5b06683bd7c.jpeg

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Comments

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  • BodilessGaze@sh.itjust.works ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    I can’t think of any possible problem with this. It’s flawless. Kudos to anon for discovering such a bulletproof plan.

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    • yokonzo@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Except if the original idea of the location of hell ( the demons home) applies. In which case OP better get off world quickly or else he’s trapped with a demon

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      • troglodytis@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        And the gold market collapsing making the bars worthless. Or if that got figured out, the life cycle of the oceans collapsing killing most life on earth.

        But hey, salt rings. So pretty neat

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  • MrJameGumb@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    The human race then perishes from starvation shortly after due to no one wanting to eat bland salt free food

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    • Zorsith@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      There’s plenty of non-ocean salt, it’s just sea salt is stupidly easy to get

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      • Tja@programming.dev ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        … ifyou have access to the sea.

        Landlocked countries (and some non landlocked) have salt mines.

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      • sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        And stupidly delicious.

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    • Rusty@lemmy.ca ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Only British people will survive.

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    • queermunist@lemmy.ml ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Ah, but our spirits are bound to Earth, so the human race just becomes a ghost race.

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    • xantoxis@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Life in the oceans dies. Life on land, which relies on life in the ocean, mostly dies. Demon gets you soon enough anyway

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  • BallsandBayonets@lemmings.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Get the gold, use a few flakes from one of the gold bars to fill a hula hoop with salt, spend the other trillions of dollars on normal rich villain shit.

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    • wiccan2@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      This reminds me of that scene in one of the Pirates of the Carribbean movies where Davey Jones has to stand in a bucket of water to go on land for a meeting.

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      • Restaldt@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        Its extra funny because they are on a beach… surrounded by water

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    • TIN@feddit.uk ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      For a while I thought you were talking about the small hoop crisps that we get in the UK and I couldn’t work out why that would help.

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    • 9point6@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      And get great abs whilst doing it

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    • sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Plot twist, you have to keep the hula hoop up or the demon can get you, because dropping the hoop would inevitably create a break in the salt somewhere.

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  • Annoyed_Crabby@monyet.cc ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Isn’t demon come from earth core

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    • ZoopZeZoop@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Salt doesn’t stop angels, according to the lore.

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  • Leviathan@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    I’m sorry, do we assume that demons are going off-planet?

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    • WhiskyTangoFoxtrot@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      They’re on Mars, right?

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      • sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        Are we assuming demons are men?

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  • Saledovil@sh.itjust.works ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    What if you’re dealing with a demon who isn’t weak to salt? What if the rules on salt circles require the salt to be on the ground, so a salt ring in orbit does nothing? What if the salt ring doesn’t meet the salt density requirement to ward off demons? What if the demon never leaves earth, instead hanging out at a coffee shop, and thus the demon doesn’t have to cross the salt circle to get to you? What if the demon simply grabs your soul after you die?

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    • troglodytis@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Oh, then you’re fuck, but still, salt rings. So pretty neat

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  • notsofunnycomment@mander.xyz ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Plus, for some time we will be able to drink from the oceans.

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    • HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Dude, fish fuck in there. ☞ó ͜つò☞

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      • sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        I see no downsides.

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      • yogurtwrong@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        well, rich people already eat fish cum might as well make it affordable

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  • _Sprite@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Anon gets snatched by the ankles beneath the earth’s crust and gets jumped for eternity

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  • echodot@feddit.uk ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    That ring is orientated incorrectly. Other than that there is absolutely nothing wrong with this idea. I’m sure all the sea life can survive having the salt removed from its environment I’m sure it’s not necessary to its survival.

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  • Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Anon slat-blocks themselves from getting that hot demonussy

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  • SkunkWorkz@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    And take out every satellite that’s orbiting Earth and kill everyone on the ISS.

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  • Buddahriffic@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    The only “demons” salt repels are the bacteria and fungi that want to eat your food and make it rot because our ancestors didn’t know what was going on to make food rot and assumed evil spirits. Salt preserves food, thus must be magic. And then the “confirmation” came because anyone who used a salt ring wasn’t attacked by evil spirits, so it must really work!

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  • atocci@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Project West Ford 2

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