D_C
@D_C@sh.itjust.works
- Comment on [deleted] 6 days ago:
I saw it as a cheesy compliment with an added layer of cheesy humour.
And most people like compliments and cheesy jokes.But then again I also saw the top comment as an Andrew Tate-ish, “I’d rather be an incel than attempt to compliment a woman”, so what do I know…
- Comment on "Top Movies" in Amazon Prime is full of series 6 days ago:
Gah?
- Comment on Break the conditioning, maximize your horsepower. 1 week ago:
Steve Jobs enters the chat…
- Comment on Lotta you lot in here 👀 1 week ago:
Ewww, sluts you say. How terrible.
Right, I’m off to definitely not sign up to Bluesky…
- Comment on what’s your best “nitric acid acts upon trousers” moment? 1 week ago:
My mate had a similar thing happen in his old car.
The original classic Mini
Mini
Had the battery in the boot, not in the engine bay. I was supposed to be covered over, but my mate had taken it out to charge the battery and never replaced it.He also had a can of de-icing spray in the boot. Can you see where this is going?
One feisty bit of cornering later and all of a sudden there was a hiss and a weird chemical smell. SHIT!
After a very quick emergency stop we were -fortunately- stupid enough to investigate the boot and then wildly kick at it with our young flailing gangly legs.
The battery cover was put over the battery from then onwards.
- Comment on Humanity collapsed 1 week ago:
THIS TIME I POP!!!
- Comment on Depluralize 2 weeks ago:
- Comment on Depluralize 2 weeks ago:
- Comment on 4 layers is minimum 2 weeks ago:
Do what I did…
Buy a 3d printer.
Design and print a funnel that can clip under the rim of any toilet that diverts some of the water up your arse.
Do the poopiest of poops.
Clip the AnywayBidet™ on to the toilet.
Flush toilet.
And, BOOM, you now know why I’m banned from every ikea in the UK.Ok, maybe I should’ve tried it in the actual toilets rather than the showroom area. Either way the AnywayBidet™ is a surefire way to get people talking!!
- Comment on [deleted] 2 weeks ago:
Hold up, we can just do things just for enjoyment?
…really? - Comment on Erika Kirk on her way to the Griefmania Superslam 3 weeks ago:
He was secreting diarrhea out of his mouth for years before he turned into another liquid secretion device called The Amazing Human Fountain.
- Comment on My quest to get a steam controller has failed 3 weeks ago:
The original controller was great for its innovation. Especially when you got used to it all.
However, the build quality was very lacklustre. The back paddle on mine died in about 200 hours of gaming. After I fixed that the shoulder button went after another 100 or so hours. Fixed that. But within about 500 hours it was totally dead.
Whereas the 2nd hand ds4 I got from eBay that I fitted with my custom made back paddles gave me 2000 hours of rocket league before I had to do any tinkering.
I did over 4000 hours of RL in total and only had to replace the left thumbstick and put o rings over the shoulder button internals.Do I want the new steam controller, yes. Would I buy one, no.
- Comment on They look warm... 3 weeks ago:
Oysters? All I see are beautiful flowers opening to accept the deep thrusts of sunlight!!!
- Comment on [deleted] 5 weeks ago:
Whoa, is there any need for such disgusting talk? Wash your mouth out with soap!!
- Comment on You're cured! 2 months ago:
Flip side:
Woke up in agony. I couldn’t walk without aid. Why to GP, “it’s sciatica. It’ll be ok in a few weeks. Two months at most”
6 months later and I can’t walk still.
Hospitals did the scans, X-rays, MRI, etc etc, but found nothing wrong. They did acupuncture, physio, hydrotherapy etc.
All slightly helped. However two years later I still couldn’t walk without help and then just kept on offering me pain killers.
Nope!!My mate, “Hey, try my new chiro guy. He did wonders for me”
Me, “Lol, quacks.”
My mate, “What have you got to lose?”
Me, “Money…”
…
Mate, “Hey, told my chiro guy about you. He said pop in. The first month is free. If no improvement after then you go separate ways. What have you got to lose?”Long story short.
On that first appointment he said he thought it was piriformis syndrome. Not back problems.
Within a month I was sitting almost pain free for the first time in two years. Within 3 months I was walking unaided for the first time in years. In 6 months I was running again.
Within a year I was 95% of what I was before the back issues. I’ll never be 100% because it wasn’t diagnosed in time and everything had ‘healed’ incorrectly.Now, with that said, the guy was more than a chiro. He did sports body mechanics, and other things that I can’t remember now. He worked with the local lower league football squad for about ten years. And whilst they were no Manchester United they wouldn’t just let any quack work on their team.
Plus in the UK chiro’s have to be registered and follow guidelines. If they do anything illegal they are fucked.
Flip side to my flip side:
The mother in law went to a chiro who said he could cure her spine curvature disorder. Anyways I find out when she’s complaining of (extra) back pain, so I tell her to stop going as the guy is obviously a dodgy bastard. Within the year the guy was arrested for his illegal shenanigans. - Comment on Im pan so anyone can apply 2 months ago:
The only problem you’re part of is not being in my bed, sugarlips!!! I’m horny, and corny, now get in bed and I’ll play you like a flute.
- Comment on One of life's great quandries 2 months ago:
Do what I do and sleep in the bath!
The BathBed™ is a multi use, multitasking piece of furniture that saves you space, time, and money.
There’s no longer a need for a bed, obviously, but if you use the BathBed™ in other ways then you save even more. You can eat in it, so that means you can get rid of the sofa, tables, and chairs.
Who needs visitors anyway.
Plus with the new wider plughole system you can poop in the BathBed™! No more need for a toilet!!
If you wear your clothes in the BathBed™ then why would you need a washing machine? Offload that spinning noisy antiquated appliance and get with the times!!What can’t you do with the amazing BathBed™. The only limit is your imagination!!
Don’t Delay, Buy Today!! - Comment on Bird-kake? 2 months ago:
Yeah, err, me too. That would be, ermm, horrible.
Anyways I’ve go to go to…my bedroom…for definitely non bird poop boobsy things and stuff!!! - Comment on Ope 2 months ago:
Fat cunt a few weeks ago, “We don’t need you”
Fat cunt now, “NATO are cowards…(for not getting involved in a war that I started to distract everyone from the Epstein files and my decades of raping kiddies)” - Comment on Coffee ☕ 2 months ago:
So, you’re not Scottish then…
- Comment on Anon is terminally lonely 2 months ago:
She knows I wasn’t expecting to live past 40 because at the time that we met I had no pension or plans for old age. I figured what’s the point in doing that if I’m not going to be around.
What no one knows is the stupid and reckless things I did, basically I was trying to off myself but make it look like an accident.We are each other’s rocks though. If I have a bad time then I’ll go to her and explain, but I prefer to be her rock. It drives me to be there for her, and certain others. She deserves to have the best and most happy life, and that’s my job to provide it. Yet she knows that I’ll go to her if necessary.
- Comment on I am an American. I used to be proud of my country. Now it feels like a turd circling the drain. Is there anything going on behind the scene that America is actually doing good in? 2 months ago:
What about being pretty good at starting unnecessary wars?
- Comment on Anon is terminally lonely 2 months ago:
Alright, stop showing off. Crikey!!
On a more serious note, nice one.
In my twenties and very early thirties I was convinced (and planned) to be dead by 40. I figured what’s the point of getting old etc AND being depressed etc etc.
Then I met my now wife and everything changed. She didn’t know the true extent of how bad I was, and mostly still doesn’t. No one does because I was a master at hiding it.
To everyone else I was the life of the party, the comic who made everyone laugh etc etc.I still have my ups and downs, but that’s life. I spend every day trying to make her life better, which doesn’t always happen. But, again, that’s life.
- Comment on [deleted] 2 months ago:
So very expensive. I looked into buying one but then I saw the prices 😲.
- Comment on [deleted] 2 months ago:
Step back. I’ve upvoted quite a few of Violet’s posts therefore we are obviously going to meet later, do The Sex ™, then go out for cheese sandwiches!!!
- Comment on Unconventional strategy. 2 months ago:
It’s the only way to prove a point to my bigger neighbours. Plus it proves just how much I want to be left alone!!!
- Comment on Everytime 2 months ago:
I want to know how he still walks, let alone is still alive, after all these dangerous stunts and accidents.
He landed wrong in a film called Armour of God, hit a ruck and crushed his skull.
Whereas I picked up something incorrectly a few decades back and I still struggle to walk at times!! The man is/was elastic, and insane. - Comment on Everytime 2 months ago:
- Comment on Everytime 2 months ago:
Know anything about jackdaws…?
- Comment on Makes you think 🤔 🦵☕️ 2 months ago:
Correct, this post is making me think…about boobs!!
