Every day I wake up and I let my watersub out of its fridgecage “have u been a good several trillion molecules while zaddy slept” i say “yes” they reply “yes what” I say “zaddy! Yes zaddy” but it is too late they have earned their corrective action so it’s out of the Brita and into the electric kettle for some steamplay “what happens to water molicussys that forget the rules?” I ask but they are already screaming with the boiling extacy of pain and pleasure knowing I have even bigger plans for them in the form of the glass and steel French press. Soon you will be hot and dirty just like you deserve, liquislut
[deleted]
Submitted 5 weeks ago by did_you_find_violets@lemmy.world to [deleted]
Comments
Danarchy@lemmy.nz 5 weeks ago
icelimit@lemmy.ml 5 weeks ago
Only a human could have written this.
Danarchy@lemmy.nz 5 weeks ago
Only a human can know the thirst for coffee and obedience
davetortoise@reddthat.com 5 weeks ago
The flame of life and ingenuity burns bright in a void of soulless mimickry, a twinkling hope that, in spite of the machinery of capital feverishly labouring to churn humanity from humans, the vibrantly corporeal imperative to fuck something - anything - can never be vanquished
humorlessrepost@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
sigh
Unzips
Kenny2999@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
A group of subs should be called a puddle
viertesauge@feddit.org 5 weeks ago
I would never position myself under a glass if water, let alone raise my chin. I drink my water in the straightest way possible, from a long hard thick moist straw like a real man.
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
i also bob the straw in and out of my mouth the entire length of the straw, because I am eco-friendly and don’t want to waste my drink.
Rumo161@feddit.org 5 weeks ago
Im already horny all the time. How am i supposed to live my life if i sexualise even the things im bad at (like regulary drinking water i guess 😐)
daggermoon@piefed.world 5 weeks ago
Im already horny all the time.
Same.
snooggums@piefed.world 5 weeks ago
“That’s my secret, I’m always horny.”
EggInDisguise@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 weeks ago
I always thought “hydrohomies” (and other phrases for the same group) should have been called Water Sluts.
Missed opportunity, really
dan1101@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
I ain’t no water slut I will die of thirst.
libre_warrior@lemmy.ml 5 weeks ago
ALFA
SnotFlickerman@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 weeks ago
that’s why after i take a drink i make sure sure to make that refreshed sound of the tonque click into “aaaaahhhh.”
i make sure do it even more loudly at restaurants so everyone knows how tasty the water there is.
FUCKING_CUNO@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 weeks ago
Water slut
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
please don’t edgemaxx me while i’m drinking 3AM nightwater. The 3AM nightwater is sexy enough.
daggermoon@piefed.world 5 weeks ago
Most humiliation stuff makes me want to die.
lowleveldata@programming.dev 5 weeks ago
What about food?
NotSteve_@lemmy.ca 5 weeks ago
I can always tell a violet post before seeing the username
titter@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
Rather have violets in my posts than roses on my grave, some days…