Every day I wake up and I let my watersub out of its fridgecage “have u been a good several trillion molecules while zaddy slept” i say “yes” they reply “yes what” I say “zaddy! Yes zaddy” but it is too late they have earned their corrective action so it’s out of the Brita and into the electric kettle for some steamplay “what happens to water molicussys that forget the rules?” I ask but they are already screaming with the boiling extacy of pain and pleasure knowing I have even bigger plans for them in the form of the glass and steel French press. Soon you will be hot and dirty just like you deserve, liquislut
[deleted]
Submitted 1 month ago by did_you_find_violets@lemmy.world to [deleted]
Comments
Danarchy@lemmy.nz 1 month ago
icelimit@lemmy.ml 1 month ago
Only a human could have written this.
Danarchy@lemmy.nz 1 month ago
Only a human can know the thirst for coffee and obedience
davetortoise@reddthat.com 1 month ago
The flame of life and ingenuity burns bright in a void of soulless mimickry, a twinkling hope that, in spite of the machinery of capital feverishly labouring to churn humanity from humans, the vibrantly corporeal imperative to fuck something - anything - can never be vanquished
humorlessrepost@lemmy.world 1 month ago
sigh
Unzips
Kenny2999@lemmy.world 1 month ago
A group of subs should be called a puddle
viertesauge@feddit.org 1 month ago
I would never position myself under a glass if water, let alone raise my chin. I drink my water in the straightest way possible, from a long hard thick moist straw like a real man.
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 1 month ago
i also bob the straw in and out of my mouth the entire length of the straw, because I am eco-friendly and don’t want to waste my drink.
Rumo161@feddit.org 1 month ago
Im already horny all the time. How am i supposed to live my life if i sexualise even the things im bad at (like regulary drinking water i guess 😐)
daggermoon@piefed.world 1 month ago
Im already horny all the time.
Same.
snooggums@piefed.world 1 month ago
“That’s my secret, I’m always horny.”
EggInDisguise@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 month ago
I always thought “hydrohomies” (and other phrases for the same group) should have been called Water Sluts.
Missed opportunity, really
dan1101@lemmy.world 1 month ago
I ain’t no water slut I will die of thirst.
libre_warrior@lemmy.ml 1 month ago
ALFA
SnotFlickerman@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 month ago
that’s why after i take a drink i make sure sure to make that refreshed sound of the tonque click into “aaaaahhhh.”
i make sure do it even more loudly at restaurants so everyone knows how tasty the water there is.
FUCKING_CUNO@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 month ago
Water slut
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 1 month ago
please don’t edgemaxx me while i’m drinking 3AM nightwater. The 3AM nightwater is sexy enough.
daggermoon@piefed.world 1 month ago
Most humiliation stuff makes me want to die.
lowleveldata@programming.dev 1 month ago
What about food?
NotSteve_@lemmy.ca 1 month ago
I can always tell a violet post before seeing the username
titter@lemmy.world 1 month ago
Rather have violets in my posts than roses on my grave, some days…