NASA scientists says astronauts should not masturbate in space

Comments

• Admetus@sopuli.xyz ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Wrong attribution to NASA aside, I think all adults know that there is much more surface tension than water in errr…the rope. Thanks Raiderkev for that awesome rundown in the comments.

  source
• socsa@piefed.social ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Good thing NASA isn’t my mom.

  source
• ZeroHora@lemmy.ml ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  “Life finds a way”

  source
• guyoverthere123@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Fuck you, I’ll shoot ropes up there!

  source
• Stalinwolf@lemmy.ca ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  (a spherical teaspoon of white glurp floats past)

  “Wot? Wadn’t me.”

  John, you’re the only man on board…

  “Don’t know wot to tell ya, mate. Said it wadn’t me…”

  source
• echodot@feddit.uk ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  The point of thrust is offset so you’d spin around uncontrollably.

  source

  • FosterMolasses@leminal.space ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    LMAOOOOOOO

    source
• Carl@hexbear.net ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  A Nasa engineer named Smythe answered questions from Conan O’Brien on his podcast Conan O’Brien Needs a Friend in 2022.

  man says funny thing on comedy podcast, more at 11

  there is simply no way that nobody has had sex in space. i know it’s against the rules but they sent a married couple up there at the same time once!

  source

  • FosterMolasses@leminal.space ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Also, who would pass that up if it were possible lol

    It’s practically a bucket list item

    source
• FE80@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  There’s a research grant to be had here.

  source
• GreenKnight23@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  in space nobody can hear you cream

  source
• JayDee@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Thought you couldn’t get it up in zero G - and even If you could, we don’t actually know if the mechanisms needed to ejaculate would function in zero G.

  source

  • jmill@lemmy.zip ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    As far as I know, everything would work fine. If it’s something you can do right-side-up, up-side-down, or prone, and in each orientation it works exactly the same way, it should work in zero G. It’s just hydraulics anyway. Not gravity dependant.

    source
  • Kolanaki@pawb.social ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Getting hard is a matter of hydraulic pressure. Don’t need gravity for your heart to pump blood, and ejaculation is a mechanical action, like swallowing.

    source
• 5715@feddit.org ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  I’m not sure nofap is the only viable strategy. What about requiring vasectomy or unisex birth control?

  Btw, porn in space is an unfapped market niche.

  source

  • TrickDacy@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    requiring vasectomy

    Yeah definitely man. I mean if you wanna go to space why don’t we jump to required castration while we’re at it?

    source

    • 5715@feddit.org ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Then provide reproductive healthcare in space

      source

      • -> View More Comments
  • Cassa@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Astronauts on mir got porn and probably used it too 🤷

    source
• timestatic@feddit.org ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Imagine you just get a wet dream and all of the female crew gets pregnant of stray cum

  source

  • webp@mander.xyz ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    That’s got to be a fetish in the future.

    source

    • FosterMolasses@leminal.space ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      deranger beat you to it lol

      source
• hobata@lemmy.ml ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  I don’t think there will be any problem if you do it with just one hand instead of two, since you’ll need the other hand to hold onto something. Although they have all sorts of straps there, so the problem is completely made up.

  source

  • Carl@hexbear.net ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    They sleep in sleeping bags basically. I feel like you could zip yourself up, with or without a partner, and make it happen.

    source
• technocrit@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  NOFAPSA

  source
• Cassa@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  false article, but fun fact!

  astronauts on Mir got porn sendt up, as well as having a small supply of alcohol for special occasions.

  aaand nobody got pregnant.

  source
• FosterMolasses@leminal.space ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Listen.

  The shit that went down with Suni Williams and Butch Wilmore with the Boeing Starliner incident was written like a NASA fanfic.

  Stranded for 10 months alone on the ISS? I hope they used protection lmao

  epilogue

  ___ “Let’s just retire after all this so things aren’t weird.”

  source

  • Transform2942@lemmy.ml ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I love your telling of the story but there is one very inconvenient detail.

    They definitely weren’t alone on the ISS, there was a whole regular Dragon crew and Soyuz crew in the station with them

    source
• ZkhqrD5o@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  That’s an interesting confirmation that everyone on the ISS has no trousers on at all times.

  source

  • fossilesque@mander.xyz ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    What kind of psycho wears trousers at home

    source
• MBech@feddit.dk ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Am I missing a joke or something? “Stray fluids” aren’t just forcing their way into people’s vaginas.

  source
• Bluedragon012@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Jack off with a condom. Problem solved. That or make a designated jack off Suit that keeps all your fluids on one spot. A full body condom if you will. I know some here are born with one, but it wouldn’t hurt to have an extra layer.

  source
• HugeNerd@lemmy.ca ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Image

  huh huhuhh hhuuhhuhuh you said spunk

  source
• Imgonnatrythis@sh.itjust.works ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  I’d feel awful for anyone that needs to masturbate in space. Zero gravity fornication has got to be the bees knees. I would hope our astronauts are so orgied-out that by the end of the day they really just don’t have it in them to want to do that.

  source