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Ask em when you get there. Not trying to be snarky, that’s genuinely the best way to do it because everyone is different.
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Submitted 4 months ago by throwawaysalami@lemm.ee to [deleted]
Comments
Paradachshund@lemmy.today 4 months ago
Mighty@lemmy.world 4 months ago
Talk to them and react to their communication.
The biggest turn-on for any person is being taken serious and actively seeking consent.
That’s it. That’s the general advice.
Kolanaki@yiffit.net 4 months ago
garloid
Man, fuck you for making me look that up. Gross.
INHALE_VEGETABLES@aussie.zone 4 months ago
stinerman@midwest.social 4 months ago
I looked it up and still have no clue what it is.
Toes@ani.social 4 months ago
It’s unique to every individual.
You gotta set the mood, have the right environment. It’s not like trying to start a lawnmower.
You’ll probably want to focus on the various erogenous zones. However, personally I don’t like people poking and rubbing my breasts but I love cuddling and them resting on top of me.
I’d suggest giving this YouTube channel a browse it’s quite informative.
brygphilomena@lemmy.world 4 months ago
In all my partners, it’s always been different. Some liked it when I was rough and threw them around. Others really enjoyed being eaten out. Almost all enjoyed fingering as foreplay. Some really, really enjoyed having their boobs played with. Another one wanted me to get angry and fuck her even when she said stop (she got really annoyed when I would listen to her and actually stop, but we were young and didn’t know what consensual non-consensual was, she didn’t tell me ahead of time, and we didn’t set up a safe word or establish the red-yellow-green system.)
The woman I am with now, really gets off from praise. She loves it when I encourage her to do what feels good for her, when I remind her how sexy she is, when I tell her how much of a good girl she is, and when I tell her I love her.
If you want a simple answer, the best I can say is to talk to the woman and find out what she enjoys and try that. Just remember that just because she enjoyed something with a precious partner doesn’t mean she will enjoy it with you. Sometimes you’ll meet a woman who doesn’t know what she likes. So try different things, encourage her to share any ideas or fantasies and try them. She might think something is sexy in her fantasy and find out it doesn’t live up to what she’s thinking.
Oh! And it can change from sexy-time to sexy-time. So pay attention to how she reacts and do what she enjoys that day.
southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 4 months ago
Man, I’ve been sexually active since the nineties. The single single most important thing I’ve learned about sex with women is that using your mouth works best. And I ain’t talking about cunnilingus (which is the fancy term for eating pussy. Fellatio is sucking dick).
You communicate. No bullshit, I’m not ignoring what you asked, it’s just that “handling” is so unpredictable that it’s useless to go about it by statistics. Yeah, most women enjoy receiving oral sex, but it isn’t everyone, and the details of how they like it vary.
Just the fact that you ask is going to have most women more confident in you as a partner, which is going to help them relax, which means whatever happens will be better than if you got lucky trying different techniques and found their favorite right away.
Even folks that aren’t comfortable talking about it, as long as you aren’t asking in a creepy or pushy way, it lets them know you’re wanting them to enjoy the process, and that helps.
And that’s really the important part. Show willing to adapt to your partner, don’t be a pushy jerk, and stay chill until it’s time to not be chill.
piyuv@lemmy.world 4 months ago
Generally speaking, before/during foreplay, women like being asked what they love in bed
pixeltree@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 months ago
It absolutely varies person to person, you should talk about it. From my limited experiences (men are more my speed) the most general well liked thing is using your hand to stimulate her clit. If you might be in the position to finger some, trim your nails beforehand.
tiefling@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 months ago
It depends a lot on the woman. Some women hate penetration, others enjoy it. Same with vibes. Fingers are probably the safest bet.
Coskii@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 months ago
There is no “one size fits all” for anyone…
I treat the first time with anyone like a session zero of a DnD campaign. We put our wants and desires forward, discuss dislikes and flat out offs, and go from there. The intimate details of how they like something is best sorted out in practice.
TheAlbatross@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 months ago
Very well said but bzzzzzt WRONG
every man woman and beast known to man woman and beast loves it when you stick it in their belly button, instant sex ender (because you win)
db2@lemmy.world 4 months ago
I put on my robe and wizard hat
Nikls94@lemmy.world 4 months ago
Explaining the nasty using DnD…. That’s the most nerdiest stuff I’ve seen all year.
Coskii@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 months ago
I do try. There were any number of ways to describe the general communication that’s strongly encouraged before getting into it with someone, and I considered using a dragon ball metaphor instead, but dungeons and dragons felt more apt. The long and the short of it is a bare minimum of what someone likes before getting started. Details to be pounded out at a later time.
kyle@lemm.ee 4 months ago
Instructions unclear, discussed sexual boundaries with my players.
Coskii@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 months ago
Depends on the campaign, but I’ve seen that work before.