it ain't the herps, I swear

Comments

• db2@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  A big brown dripping hot sausage. 😈

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  • over_clox@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    You had me at dripping… 💦

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• Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  This, legitimately, is what would happen to me. This kind of shit comprises the vast majority of my life story.

  Fuck

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  • telllos@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Don’t cook homemade caramel.

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    • dalekcaan@lemm.ee ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      AKA confectioners napalm

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  • steal_your_face@lemmy.ml ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Larry David is that you?

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    • Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      If my hairline keeps migrating, i may look like him soon

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  • HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    You know what got me to stop wearing contacts for good? Bacon grease popped directly into my eye.

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• rockerface@lemm.ee ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  Could be worse, could be burn from hot candied nuts. Try explaining that one

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  • Droggelbecher@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    I’ve got a scar on my foot from a splash of caramel fresh from the pan

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• over_clox@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  If the sausage grease is boiling hot, someone might need to see a doctor…

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  • Death_Equity@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Don’t demonic possession shame people. They are vessels and can’t choose the nature of the spirit that has taken their mortal form.

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• slingstone@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  It’s not the herp, it’s the derp.

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  • blanketswithsmallpox@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Por que no los dos? Even Wizards get it from their parents.

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• wesker@lemmy.sdf.org ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  Don’t use your teeth!

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• Sam_Bass@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  I always poke them with a fork first to relieve pressure

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  • RecluseRamble@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Forking does relieve pressure.

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• Leate_Wonceslace@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  “Is that a blister or a coldsore?”

  > I got it by sucking a hot sausage.

  “Do you have any idea how little that narrows it down?”

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• CurlyWurlies4All@slrpnk.net ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  You people bake your sausages?

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• shasta@lemm.ee ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  So “hot food”. Problem solved.

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• kyle@lemm.ee ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  Amateur move! Gotta be careful around hot sausage splooge.

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