It’s a kink just like anything else. Some people get off on being degraded I guess. I have done race play in the past, it’s not really my thing but it is in the moment because it’s their thing. Seeing them get off to it is the attractive part, not really the “how” if that makes sense?
Comment on Anon awakens something
Gullible@sh.itjust.works 2 days ago
I don’t get race play. I’ve been with people of other races and never even began to consider race play. I have to wonder how someone finds it sexy to consider race. Is it related to dom/sub, but expanded to all of society?
BeUnique@lemmy.zip 16 hours ago
Gullible@sh.itjust.works 10 hours ago
I understand this perspective a bit better, yeah.
A_Wild_Alt_Appears@fedinsfw.app 2 days ago
Much of kink is people playing with the things that feel heavy to them in ways that push their buttons.
Race and the dynamics around it are a heavy thing that we internalize as part of our social conditioning, and for some people they have a desire to play with it.
Personally I have no interest, and its important for people to remember that the heavy things they like to play with are difficult subjects and to treat them with care (often people do not adequately engage with why raceplay is so heavy, and then engage with others in a shitty way as a result. At which point it is not play, just racism). But as long as folks treat the subject with the appropriate respect and sensitivity until they’ve negotiated a dynamic and then stay within what’s negotiated I see it as being similar to all the other ways folks like to play with the things that are heavy to them. Like consentual nonconsent, where people roleplay nonconsentual sex, or forced feminization as a way of playing with the harmful way men are measured against a metric of masculinity and punished for failing by comparing them to women as degradation.
But then, I’m white, so folks actually impacted by the heaviness of the subject may feel differently, and its important to listen to people actually impacted by something. In the kink community in my area it crops up as a point of contention periodically.
Avicenna@programming.dev 2 days ago
I think you are reading too much into it, in many cases I think it is a “different looks interesting” kind of situation. In some cases, especially when it has become a fetish, yea might be a deeper psychological aspect.
cattywampus@lemmy.world 2 days ago
Tell humans something is naughty or bad and some will find a thrill in it regardless of what it is. Also it’s a power exchange which is a very common dynamic humans enjoy in and outside the bedroom.
janus2@lemmy.zip 2 days ago
most taboo subject kinks revolve heavily around the fact that it just is taboo, and the actual taboo itself is more of a flavor (at least in healthy use cases)
I’m a part time professional dominatrix and have had two clients whose sessions involved race play. One where it was the main thing, and the other just part of it. For both of them I could tell they were deriving pleasure from the power exchange aspect, and the race thing was just the specific form it took for them
It makes sense that for a majority of people, it’s going to be completely unsexy and seem strange and incomprehensible. If it weren’t, it wouldn’t be a kink
captainlezbian@lemmy.world 1 day ago
It’s also popular with racists which is part of why kink communities are often so against it
hessenjunge@discuss.tchncs.de 1 day ago
It’s just a kink and there are weirder kinks, way way weirder kinks.
Gullible@sh.itjust.works 1 day ago
Most of which I understood on some level. But I’ve received enough answers to recognize the vague shape of it now.
Hacksaw@lemmy.ca 1 day ago
Race play is the same as cnc… There is something that causes you anxiety or pain or trauma in real life, then you release that anxiety through sexualization of your fear because it now becomes something you control.
falcunculus@jlai.lu 2 days ago
Sexual relations are the continuation of normal relations, making sexuality a mirror reflecting society. Findom reflects class relations, D/S reflects gender relations, SM reflects christianity, race play reflects racism, etc.
CackNClap@infosec.pub 2 days ago
SM reflects Christianity? Maybe for some I guess but I’m sure people from all religious backgrounds and none enjoy S&M.
captainlezbian@lemmy.world 21 hours ago
Also, D/s is commonly engaged in in gay relationships. It reflects power dynamics
falcunculus@jlai.lu 2 days ago
Sure, this is a gross oversimplification, and SM is very wide; but the impact of two thousand years of Christianity really is very significant to the western psyche, even among the non-christian.
Things like being bad and deserving punishment or suffering leading to ascension are so close to christian concepts (sinning and hell, the passion of Christ) that it would be surprising for them not to be connected.
captainlezbian@lemmy.world 20 hours ago
In some ways yes, in other ways you’re way off.
D/s reflects general power dynamics. Straight couples with dominant men often use the existing gender relations for it. And dominant straight women often invert it. But plenty of other power dynamics are used here, such as elder/younger, noble/servant, boss/employee, military, teacher/student, owner/pet, etc. Hell a lot of power exchange organizations are still moving away from master/slave terminology.
And sadomasochism seems deeper in the human psyche than Christianity. Yeah Christianity really encourages it, but it seems to be more like runners high and the appreciation of horror movies than just some reflection of Christianity.
Both D/s and sm are very broad categories whereas findom and race play are both categories of D/s
Viceversa@lemmy.world 2 days ago
What is findom? Financial domination? Like being a sugar daddy?
SalmiakDragon@feddit.nu 2 days ago
Yes, financial domination. I think it’s more akin to being someone’s ATM.
formation@sh.itjust.works 2 days ago
I keep on ending up like this unironically when the relationship starts off closer to 50/50 slowly 60/40 70/30 then they lose their job then its 100/0 forever even when they gain their job back.
captainlezbian@lemmy.world 20 hours ago
Yeah I think you just keep dating freeloaders, unless they’re like being dominant about being broke.
SUDO@reddthat.com 1 day ago
This is not financial advice, but I think if you are stressing your bond allocation too much; you may be missing out on compounding growth. A targeted date fund is perfectly acceptable, so much so that it is a standard in most investment portfolios and even the default, daddy.
yakko@feddit.uk 2 days ago
I’m literally married to someone of another ethnicity and we’ve never wanted to do race play.
WeLoveCastingSpellz@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 days ago
It has racist roots. Like sissy and bimbo kinks have misogynist roots and orientation play has homophobic roots. None of these kinks are problematic. You are into what they are into and any way two adult consenting partners get each other off should be celebrated.
jdr@lemmy.ml 1 day ago
I’m into destroying historical artefacts
WeLoveCastingSpellz@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 day ago
I am into ripping the intestines out of the frail bodies of straw man argument doers
Guttural@jlai.lu 1 day ago
Smooth
jdr@lemmy.ml 1 day ago
I consent!
Valmond@lemmy.dbzer0.com 19 hours ago
Indy?