Comment on Anon has a dream
latenightnoir@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 days ago
She 👏 Is 👏 Cuddling 👏 With 👏 You 👏 She 👏 Wants 👏 Emotional 👏 Stability 👏 First 👏!!!
Dunno if I used this meme correctly, but I did feel the need for it… I miss cuddling so damned much…
Given it’s a dream, there could be some interpretation that the OOP is craving emotional stability.
His own subconscious doesn’t even want to have mindless pleasure anymore, but comfort. He denies himself because he doesn’t truly want sex, but the stability of deep, emotional contact.
Also given it’s a dream, the null hypothesis should be that it is completely meaningless, a random firing of neurons that occurs as the brain conducts routine maintenance.
Then there are weird dreams where you live a story organically but the end was preconcluded from the very start.
Agreed, I, too, have come to believe that dreams are basically the subconscious’ attempts at contextualising significant emotional conundrums or cognitive dissonances, and, if not an indicator of OP’s desire for intimacy, it seems to be at least a clear indicator that their subconscious is beginning to be aware of the problem.
Such a pity that so many people who reach this emotional threshold with themselves swing, instead, to shills and bootlickers who just want to propagate any and all forms of unhealthy relationships…
Tbf, those are not mutually exclusive. I want to have sex with someone, preferably someone with whom I have a deep, stable, emotional connection.
I do understand it takes time to build that connection, and am fine with having sex with someone before we get to that stage, but at least ostensibly that’s the direction I’d like to be heading, and if it seems like we’re just not going to get there we can stop having sex and just be friends or even just be acquaintances that don’t really chill because we’re adults and have no time but still be friendly.
I think it used to be called dating back in the day but who knows lol.
Bro cuddles especially with a back scratch is better than sex ngl
F’real, I’d take cuddling with my bros over sex anyway.
Because I think sexuality is too much to be asked for. She needs marriage, responsibility, pledge for the commitment by the man also.
I think that comes down to individualpreferences, to be honest. Some people, yeah, want the whole kit and kaboodle of stability before anything jorizontal takes place. Others just want to establish an emotional relationship beforehand, while others are just fine jumping in straight from the go, so to speak. And I genuinely think every variant is fine, we just have to take people at their word and respect their desires as much as possible, sometimes by letting eachother go.
It was his dream. She’s not real. She is a reflection of his own subconscious.
Or she’s not into you and just wants to cuddle. She’ll probably cuddle with her family members too, doesnt mean she wants to fuck them.
koper@feddit.nl 6 days ago
Yep. If anything, this is an opportunity for the guy to show that he’s not just in it for the sex.
When I date men, one of the main things I look for is how they handle rejection.
latenightnoir@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 days ago
While I’m not all that keen on the concept of testing partners (this coming from someone who can roughly be described as a cishet guy), I do agree that it is a good indicator of both maturity and intent.
porous_grey_matter@lemmy.ml 6 days ago
I don’t think they meant “testing” them like it’s some kind of game, hardly anyone does that and yeah it’s fucked up when they do.
It’s just, how do they handle it when you say no, do they moan about it and act entitled or just understand you’re a human being who doesn’t feel like sex literally all the time. That’s a real good piece of evidence to how this person actually views you and their relationship to you.
latenightnoir@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 days ago
Fair point, may be ancognitive bias of mine. Once burnt, twice shy, and all that. I apologise for misunderstanding, and thank you for pointing it out! Truly!
And, yep, 100% behind you. I’d say compatibility in general shows best when dealing with unpleasantness, because being couch potatoes together will always be the lowest common denominator, so to speak.