Is my reaction weird?

Submitted ⁨⁨4⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩ by ⁨Notacatonmars@lemmy.cafe⁩ to ⁨[deleted]⁩

I took the bus like usual today and I was sitting on a side seat. Two cute women enter it and since they couldn’t find a seat, they stood next to me. They were engrossed in their conversation so I didnt think much when one of them started leaning on me. But she didnt stop leaning on me, this went on for the next 10 mins. I could feel her hips and stomach on my side.

I was trying to look at my phone to distract myself but I popped a boner. It was very awkward as I couldn’t go anywhere and I was starting to panic. I was looking around to see if anyone noticed by thankfully no one did. But wtf bruh. The bus was kinda crowded but she had more than enough space to stand properly.

I got off the bus and holy shit, I felt like a million bucks. I never touched a women or even held hands with one so this was new. This was probably the best day in a long time for me. My depression actually got better for now. Is my reaction weird/creepy?

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hendrik@palaver.p3x.de ⁨4⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
If you're about 14-17 or a bit more or less, this is perfectly normal. Should become more rare once you get older. Just rummage in your backpack and then place it onto your lap. Problem solved.

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- Notacatonmars@lemmy.cafe ⁨4⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  [deleted]
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  - pearsaltchocolatebar@discuss.online ⁨4⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    It’s a boner. There’s no reason to get embarrassed about it.
    
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SnokenKeekaGuard@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨4⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
Natural reaction.

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j4k3@lemmy.world ⁨4⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
Boners are largely age dependent. I remember in high school I got random boners all the time and anything could trigger them. Now, at 40, I have way more control plus novelty matures and wears off IMO.

You should have said hello or tried – YOLO. Those opportunities dwindle with age for the most part.

Try to step out of your own perspective in a mental abstracted exercise and ask yourself, ‘If that was me is there any chance I would be touching someone like this and not notice?’ Then, ‘What is the least amount of meaning I would attribute to such a gesture? – (now conservatively divide that by /10).’ Finally, ‘If I were in this person’s state of mind, how would I perceive a stranger talking to me?’ IMO, when with a friend, the person is going to be on the high ground and feeling secure and safe from embarrassment. If you directly address the touching, you’re going to be at a disadvantage and get shut down. However, if you can find a way into making conversation, the touching was like an invitation to do so. By not addressing it directly you are using it as a step up into exploring more. The hard part is just the small talk. Many people are just more tactile, but in our present world, touching strangers (at least in the USA) is very rare.

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- SolOrion@sh.itjust.works ⁨4⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  
  Boners are largely age dependent. I remember in high school I got random boners all the time and anything could trigger them.
  
  100%. I remember sometimes they’d happen in Church of all places. No clue what happened. Tip for anyone with this problem currently: flex your legs hard and repeatedly. Always worked for me.
  
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Zachariah@lemmy.world ⁨4⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
Please put an NSFW tag on this. I was on the train and when I saw this I had to start furiously masterbating. Everyone else gave me strange looks and were saying things like “what the fuck” and “call the police”. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this image. Now there is a whole train of men masterbating together at this one image. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this if you had just tagged this post NSFW.

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11111one11111@lemmy.world ⁨4⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
Na. Without context maybe but from your account naaaa I used to pop a chub on the school bus going up and down the country roads. Usually just played it off as scratching my balls but would actually just tuck it into the waste band.

No matter how many people say otherwise the only thing that truly matters at the end of life is your happiness and psychological well being. Family, friends, jobs and houses will come and go. Don’t ever let yourself get too lost being comfortable with depression. It’s not ever going to get easier but the rest of life will and does get easier. Especially if you continue to fight the depression because nothing in life will ever be more taxing than fighting yourself.

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- Notacatonmars@lemmy.cafe ⁨4⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  Thank you.
  
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ContrarianTrail@lemm.ee ⁨4⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
I don’t know about weird but that’s a bit sad read. I hope you’re young.

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xmunk@sh.itjust.works ⁨4⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
Boners are a natural reaction that’s pretty much out of our control so getting one and hiding it isn’t a bad thing.

It’s not okay nonconsensually involve someone in your stuff so making someone aware of your boner is absolutely not okay. Ditto for taking advantage of a situation like that to grope/fondle the person.

I’d need to know more to be sure (and to know specifically information you don’t know) but it doesn’t sound like you did anything to make anyone feel uncomfortable so I think there’s nothing wrong on that count.

It does sound like you’re extremely tightly wound sexually though, so there may be some stuff you should examine internally - like why that was so exciting for you. It sounds like you may need a more healthy sexual outlet if you’re reacting this strongly.

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HobbitFoot@thelemmy.club ⁨4⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
Natural reaction, but also it is good that you weren’t trying to be a creep in that situation.

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user224@lemmy.sdf.org ⁨4⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
I mean, your reaction was nothing but a physical response, so I wouldn’t say so.
As long as you don’t do it on purpose, no, not weird.

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- Kit@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨4⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  Can guys get a boner on purpose?
  
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  - GBU_28@lemm.ee ⁨4⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    Sure, I could think of my wife’s body, or a great time we were together and the vibe was 100%, and spawn a boner. But like, it’s the thoughts that do it. You can’t just like… Flex and create it or something
    
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  - clay_pidgin@sh.itjust.works ⁨4⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    By thinking sexy thoughts, sure. Probably not everyone, as I’m sure some people are more physically aroused than mentally.
    
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  - user224@lemmy.sdf.org ⁨4⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    I meant touching strangers, or anyone without consent.
    
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NeoNachtwaechter@lemmy.world ⁨4⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

But she didnt stop leaning on me, this went on for the next 10 mins.

You could kindly offer her to sit on your lap.

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