Comment on The consequences (of my actions) have been extreme

hperrin@lemmy.ca ⁨4⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

• KillingTimeItself@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

  derek sounds like a dick.

  What you do in private does not necessarily reflect who you are in public. And who you are in public, does not necessarily reflect who you are in private either.

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  • hperrin@lemmy.ca ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

    This was not private. This was a group of assholes laughing behind their friends’ backs at their expense. It was secret, but not private.

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    • Ilovethebomb@lemm.ee ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

      That is a very pedantic response.

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      • Tuuktuuk@sopuli.xyz ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

        But makes a very big difference. Talking bad things about someone publicly is not okay, and the whistleblower is doing the right thing. Well, mostly. It’s not really cool that now the private messages are shared with even more people!

        Talking about anything privately is a private discussion and as such, not a huge problem. Sharing someone’s private messages with a group with more than two or three members is already public to an extent.

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    • KillingTimeItself@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

      was the entire “secret” group chat dedicated to making fun of people though? That’s the thing we don’t know, it just seems like a fairly active, long running group chat, with a number of distasteful posts made over time.

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      • hperrin@lemmy.ca ⁨2⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

        If you have a secret group chat where you make fun of your friends behind their backs, then you’re an awful piece of shit. I don’t care if it’s not solely dedicated to making fun of people. If you do it enough that your friend group ostracizes you when they find out, then you deserve to be ostracized. Why are you defending this behavior? Do you do this?

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  • jwmgregory@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

    lmfao what a fucking excuse of a reason. i hope you know i hate you. not hyperbole. i hope everyone else knows i hate you too. like genuinely, and actually; blatantly being a terrible person like you are is a large part of what is wrong with the world and i despise every single one of you chucklefucks that inches us every further away from decency day by day.

    do you recognize you’re doing olympic level mental gymnastics in order to make the people you identify with in the internet story the good guys or are you just incredibly dense and/or like fucking with people for kicks?

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    • camr_on@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

      i despise every single one of you chucklefucks that inches us ever further away from common decency, day by day.

      i hope you know i hate you. not hyperbole. i hope everyone else knows i hate you too. like genuinely, and actually

      Calm down and look in the mirror. You’re part of the problem

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      • jwmgregory@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

        no actually, i’m done sitting and acting like that sort of shit is acceptable, no thanks.

        paradox of tolerance demands you completely and decisively shut these fucks down before they takeover your society with their shitty ass rhetoric of hate

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    • Rin@lemm.ee ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

      i sure my friend didn’t order a yappuchino.

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      • KillingTimeItself@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

        TRUE

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    • zwekihoyy@lemmy.ml ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

      I agree with your sentiment, but common decency has never existed. I hope you realize that

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      • jwmgregory@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

        this is a fair point, i don’t disagree. it’s valid to call me out on conflating ideas of common decency with absolute morality.

        that said, there are certain things that if you do; definitely make you a bad person. i think to the recently viral tweet of the ivy league ethics & philosophy professor who was absolutely aghast at incoming students’ ideas of morality. it speaks to the problem in this thread.

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    • Ilandar@lemm.ee ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

      Is this a copypasta?

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    • ByteOnBikes@slrpnk.net ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

      Gonna share this again.

      This commenter said it best:

      To the people who think what OP did was completely normal and something everyone does, (and I hate to use this phrase) check the “ratio” here. Nobody thinks this is normal. You and OP are in the slim minority spewing vile shit about people in your lives. It’s cruel and childish. You’d be smart to learn from OP’s predicament before you find yourself in the exact same situation with everyone you know hating you because you thought it was perfectly normal to constantly trash talk them behind their back. It’s not normal. Not everyone is doing it. Assholes like OP and apparently yourself are doing it. And it clearly can bite you in the ass. As I said in my initial comment, these kinds of things can have serious real world consequences. So you may wanna wise up and start being a respectable human being ;)

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      • jwmgregory@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

        my only disagreement is that unfortunately they’ve succeeded in pushing the overton window so hard that the ratio is actually much more controversial than the comment implies. if only every edgelord here read and seriously considered this.

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    • KillingTimeItself@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

      damn bro, that’s crazy.

      Unfortunately i will sleep well knowing that i don’t engage in shitty behavior with people, and that i just simply do not care about shit like this that much.

      do you recognize you’re doing olympic level mental gymnastics throughout these comments in order to make the people you identify with in the internet story the good guys or are you just incredibly dense and/or like fucking with people for kicks?

      i don’t like anybody here, all of these people sound like assholes, some of them stuck up their own asses, others a bit too unfiltered for their own good. But we also don’t know the full extent of the conversation and fallout from this, so who knows what actually happened.

      Regardless if derek wanted to make the point that these people weren’t great, he didn’t need to leak messages, especially not 5 year old ones. He put as much effort as possible into destroying this friend group, and i wouldn’t be surprised if this is regular behavior from him. People like that use it to their advantage, only to fuck over people later in their lives by doing the same shit lmao.

      Anybody willing to without permission leak shit like is asking for trouble, legally or not.

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  • Korhaka@sopuli.xyz ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

    Realistically I don’t think we have enough information to judge fairly. The person is probably minimising what they did, and if that is the case may well have deserved it. But we don’t actually know what was said.

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    • KillingTimeItself@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

      that is true, but i think this is a definite “everybody sucks” type of post.

      I’m also not sure that derek needed to leak this either, especially going back like 5 years, that’s pretty unhinged. Even a “yeah i don’t like those guys i joined the group chat and it was 💀” is going to be enough to clue most people in.

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      • Korhaka@sopuli.xyz ⁨2⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

        That is possible too, it depends what was said.

        Hey guys check out this slut I just shagged! Started talking to this girl. Here is the chat, what should I say? Just started using Tinder, matched with this girl. Meeting her tonight!

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• MacNCheezus@lemmy.today ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

  Derek sounds like a snitch

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  • hperrin@lemmy.ca ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

    Good. Don’t be an asshole to your friends behind their backs. That’s trashy behavior, and you deserve to lose your friends if you do it.

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    • MacNCheezus@lemmy.today ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

      Nothing in the OP suggests that anyone was being an asshole to Derek in particular.

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      • redwattlebird@lemmings.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

        Oh, I don’t think they’re taking about Derek…

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• ILikeBoobies@lemmy.ca ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

  Invasion of privacy, not cool

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  • Jtskywalker@lemm.ee ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

    What about the people on the group chat who were disrespecting other people’s right to privacy by sharing private mesaages and pictures? It’s cool when they do it?

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    • ILikeBoobies@lemmy.ca ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

      It’s not cool when anyone does it

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    • JuxtaposedJaguar@lemmy.ml ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

      Tell those particular people. Maybe screenshot those particular messages as proof. But don’t publicly share everything.

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      • Rampsquatch@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

        See, you misunderstand. You must either be enraged that there was a snitch, or uphold them as a paragon of justice. There is no nuance on the internet. Silly person.

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