KyuubiNoKitsune
@KyuubiNoKitsune@lemmy.blahaj.zone
- Comment on She's out of town and I'm cleaning her entire collection as a surprise 6 hours ago:
Canola oil.
- Comment on grindset challenge 2 weeks ago:
Nope, too challenging, gonna go cry at my flu shot appointment.
- Comment on unforgivable bad bad mommy 2 weeks ago:
It was stolen, so please go ahead.
- Comment on unforgivable bad bad mommy 2 weeks ago:
You should’ve labelled this picture as NSFW.
I was an ironworker. Key word: was. We were on break, 34th floor of the new OmniCorp tower, just doomscrolling on our phones. I’m munching on a sad turkey sandwich when my thumb stops. My eyes landed on this… this thing. This cursed JPEG.
My primate brain experienced a neuron activation so profound, so earth-shattering, it bypassed all conscious thought. My sandwich was yeeted into the abyss below. My hand, moving with a will of its own, started going at a velocity previously thought to be impossible by modern science. I was a one-man-demolition-crew, furiously fapping right there on the I-beam. The sheer friction was threatening to set my pants on fire.
My buddy Frank looks over. “Dude, what the F—” He stops. His eyes lock onto my screen. His jaw unhinged. A silent, based understanding passed between us. He didn’t even hesitate. He just joined in, his own hand a blur of motion.
It was a goddamn pandemic. Brenda, our crane operator, saw it on my phone through her binoculars. The crane started bucking and gyrating like it was trying to win a twerking competition. The foreman, a 60-year-old dude named Gus, dropped his clipboard and went absolutely feral. The entire construction site became a symphony of furious, unsanctioned fapping.
But Kevin. Fucking Kevin. He was holding the ONLY temporary load-bearing support strut for the entire western facade. He saw the image. He saw us. And he made a choice. He chose the coom. He let go of the strut. Both hands. For the cause.
I heard a groan of tortured steel, a sound I can only describe as the universe saying “lmao skill issue,” and then it was just sky, concrete, sky, concrete.
I woke up in a hospital bed. I’m paralyzed from the waist down for a month. How do you tell a doctor that a multi-million dollar project was yeeted into oblivion by a single, powerful image that triggered a site-wide, catastrophic fap-session?
So I’m telling you, from my hospital bed, with a catheter I’ve nicknamed ‘Kevin’s Shame’… It’s YOUR fault. All of it. You should have tagged this NSFW.
- Comment on Anon shops for diamonds 3 weeks ago:
Oddly specific ending
- Comment on Wear your seatbelt 4 weeks ago:
🦆ing is when you lower yourself to go under a beam or something.
- Comment on Wear your seatbelt 4 weeks ago:
Lol!
- Comment on Wear your seatbelt 4 weeks ago:
You can swear on the Internet
- Comment on historule 4 weeks ago:
Doing the Lady’s work.
- Comment on Why do companies always need to grow? 4 weeks ago:
I’d highly recommend watching this video, it goes through the history of capitalism and why it is the way it is now
- Comment on bred 1 month ago:
Or better
- Comment on Today's featured article on Wikipedia: Myst V: End of Ages 1 month ago:
I hate the changes to Riven. They modified it to cater to VR and it really made me dislike it. I looked forward to the remake since the Starry Expanse project was started, that was like, 2009, and when I played it I felt so disappointed.
- Comment on Today's featured article on Wikipedia: Myst V: End of Ages 1 month ago:
I’ve tried 2 times and couldn’t push myself to finish it
- Comment on Today's featured article on Wikipedia: Myst V: End of Ages 1 month ago:
I loved that age too
- Comment on Today's featured article on Wikipedia: Myst V: End of Ages 1 month ago:
Holy shit
- Comment on We could have had it all 1 month ago:
But but… Money, and land, and power and that person is different to what I’m used to and makes me uncomfortable, where’s my favourite throwing rock?
- Comment on Star Citizen fans sigh deeply, rub their foreheads as developer casts doubt on Squadron 42's 2026 release: 'I don't know if we're going to make it' 1 month ago:
Yes
- Comment on Stinky is cute y'all why ban him 2 months ago:
The 90’s one was made by studio Ghibli. I had already been exposed to some of the books so I loved the series when it came out. But watching it in English doesn’t work for me either, lol.
- Comment on Stinky is cute y'all why ban him 2 months ago:
Oof, I seriously hate it, god damn. I guess my perception is warped from growing up with the books and specifically the Afrikaans dubbed anime. I both hate his voice and the shit he’s saying.
- Comment on Teddybears - Punkrocker 2 months ago:
Cavill’s one looked badass
- Comment on Post your homescreen 2 months ago:
Oneplus represent
- Comment on Post your homescreen 2 months ago:
What a mess
- Comment on Teddybears - Punkrocker 2 months ago:
Why does the new superman look like such an idiot? The uniform also looks kinda weird and like he’s wearing a red diaper over an I’ll fitting suite.
- Comment on Honkwiching 2 months ago:
- Comment on Anon updates GNU/linux 2 months ago:
Computer literacy is definitely down in gen z and alpha.
- Comment on 🚦 Don't walk... be gay! 3 months ago:
Stockholm too
- Comment on Anon does the shopping 3 months ago:
Fake (anon has gf) and gay (said fake gf hates the plates)
- Comment on Anon isn't a Microsoft fan 3 months ago:
Embrace, Extend and Extinguish…
Its a Microsoft strategy.
The studio I was just laid off from was super successful and Microsoft has now gutted it with the last layoffs. I don’t think it’ll be successful for that much longer, morale is now non existent and people don’t want to work.
Business decisions made by C suites rarely make sense on the ground.
- Comment on The Ocean 3 months ago:
The real reason…
- Comment on Thank you, Thor! 3 months ago:
Time for the EU to adopt FrejaID
