DrivebyHaiku

@DrivebyHaiku@lemmy.ca

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Age check⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  The issue here is that on Monica’s side the punishment was disproportionate. She isn’t some rich, powerful person who could withdraw to her ivory tower. She was 22 and made the kind of mistake 22 year olds make and that is what she gets to be known for forever. Think about a 22 year old in your life and the resources they have at their disposal. She went back to her parents place, buried herself away from the world and tried not to commit suicide as all of media took turns making jokes about her being an easy slut. Her day to day life for decades was virtually destroyed with her being barely able to form a career or new relationships. She stopped being a person and endured a prison without a cage.

  Clinton got a formalized process and quietly withdrew into absurd wealth while the media by turns gave him largely a pass for being a dog once the process of getting him out of office was done.

  Whatever Gods or Devils punished Lewinski they’ve exacted their due ages ago and kicking people who have already hit the floor hard isn’t morally healthy. Nobody needs to continue to hold Lewinski accountable anymore. She served her time.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨[deleted]⁩ ⁨⁨6⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  This is career advice, not anti-intellectualism. With the rising cost of schools that leave so many in debt bondage University has risks. If you pick a field of study that you find rewarding but the jobs associated crush your soul or if there is no job then you end up in fantastic amounts of debt that unlike other debt cannot be forgiven. A lot of education via a university route is padded or inflated with requirements for the degree that do not add to one’s meaningful body of knowledge but exist to line the pockets of the institutions.

  None of this is to say that one shouldn’t pursue knowledge, university is not the only route toward intellectualism. Being in trades does not stop one from learning from other resources. Autodiadactism is on the rise. What people are against is a predatory system of for profit post secondary education.

  Misogyny, homophobia, transphobia and other forms of bigotry are also not inherent in blue collar positions by default. It more depends on your geographical location and crew in either situation because the more culturally normal it is in a given city to be queer or how many women are hired in a work place change those workplaces. As a trans person I have worked a number of blue collar jobs that compared to trans friends of mine in whitecollar positions have been more universally accepting of my identity. A number of my co-workers in those construction jobs are also damn near always in classes of some variety, sometimes in accredited institutions but not always. We are all in situations where the job market and personal survival pushes us to the practicality of going where the money is for work but not allowing ourselves to be entirely defined by our jobs. Sometimes the blue collar positions are very meaningful. They are often tied in to incredibly basic facets of quality of life, helping people be properly sheltered, hygenic and comfortable or improving communities through infrastructure.

  Your post in some ways comes across as a bit elitist as though white collar positions demanding high levels of acreditied education are more valid than blue collar ones. We should be looking to support blue collar positions as not failure states and provide safety nets for the physical strain of those positions while offering workers chances to obtain education for education sake at reasonable cost to allow them career flexibility and personal enrichment while critiquing systems that place so great a financial burden on students.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Why aren't you creating more workers??⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  The “right” shy of outright fascists are neoliberals. The term was coined in the eighties and describes a system that like Liberalism classic works primarily off of an idea of a protected class of citizen (as opposed to lesser protected classes of non-citizen) with a series of fundemental “rights” to basic protected freedoms from government interference and choice of “style of life” based around a personal property centric system.

  Where Neo-liberalism differs is it detests the welfare state, seeks widespread government deregulation as they see it as an economic deficit, practice widespread government austerity in public programs and seeks to privatize swaths of government services to create new market sectors.

  Neo doesn’t mean new in a “of the minute” kind of way. The people who came up with the distinction between liberal branches were describing the likes of Ronald Regan and Margret Thatcher.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Let's hear it, little lemmings.⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Leonardo.

  I have a long held theory based on the history of the Mona Lisa (Being recognized as a genderswapped self portrait he literally entitled “the Happy one” carried around by the artist and gifted to his gay lover after death) that the artist was trans.

  I would absolutely love to potentially verify this because the idea that one of the most famous paintings in the world has been a trans gender affirming portrait in plain sight of art historians this whole time with nobody cluing in and writing a proper paper about it - is just kind of the best.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Anon thinks there is a bicurious double standard⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  If that was your point you did not elucidate it well.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Anon thinks there is a bicurious double standard⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Some people in a general sense are sluts. This is an old assumption that bi and gay folk are more sexually careless that hasn’t really been true since the aids crisis.

  Fun fact, wherever there is stigma or barriers in seeking health care or populations that are discriminated against you see higher rates of STIs because people wait longer to check on things that go wrong and don’t catch them before they take hold. This includes immigrant populations, religious minorities in hostile cultures, queer people, racial minorities, homeless populations… They aren’t all rawdogging it, these groups often feel they can’t be honest with a doc or fear being rejected from healthcare situations. Some queer folk have trauma around medical care in the past. Where management and early testing drops off disease transmission becomes more common.

  You will see old studies positing the multiple partners thing but the cutting edge data has seen this is a problem faced by multiple populations with the core of the problem sourced and traceable to the degree of stigma against the patients.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Anon thinks there is a bicurious double standard⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  It was more your entire second paragraph that hinges on the idea that just because bi people are potentially attracted by both sexes that it is unfair and “abuse” to expect bi folk to desire monogamy or make monogamy work. That’s a pretty old fashioned form of biphobia that projects that a bi person is either incapable of being satisfied by any one person like a straight or gay person is or that they are more likely to stray or be a problem for their partners.

  It isn’t abuse to expect a partner to be faithful.

  Some bi people cheat or go in for polyamory because some people cheat or go in for polyamory regardless of gender or sexually . Bi people are not especially predisposed. Projecting your own wandering eye and assuming that is a more universal problem for people of a different sexuality that negates their viability in a form of romantic relationship isn’t cool.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Anon thinks there is a bicurious double standard⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Dude… Bi people still do monogamy and a lot of them don’t want polyamory or cheating. If you have a problem keeping to a single person that’s a you thing, don’t project it onto others.

  Calling it “abuse” is really fucking weird.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Why does America feel the need to control the world? Do what they say? Instead of taking care of their own problems at home? When did the US become police officer of the world and enforcer?⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  This is a very America centric veiw and even if it is a steel man it deserves a counterpoint.

  After WWII most of the nations who were old empire builders were decimated. The general feeling was even those on the winning side didn’t feel like they’d won. The rebuilding was slow and economic austerity lasted for decades.

  The American prosperity of the 1950’s and 60’s wasn’t “normal”. America didn’t have international competition it otherwise would have and that power gave them bargaining rights which made them both culturally dominant as they projected a sense of prosperity and politically powerful due to the resources at their disposal. Opposition to America was potentially disastrous and America threw their weight around like crazy. They expanded their military with these resources and established bases in countries too weak to oppose them.

  America came out of the war with something of a Big Damn Hero complex. Communism, for all it’s perceived threat was also a handy excuse to pursue expansion and in keeping American supremacy in place. Whether countries wantes to be “protected” or not really has a lot of across the board nuance. A lot of American political will was coercive and a lot of the things done in the fight for “democracy” were disproportionate and horrific.

  Really a lot of the American supremacy at bottom was might makes right. With the world finally recovering economically and now able to speak as equals the US is using measures that demand a return to that economic supremacy and stranglehold. The larger sore points are growing. The world doesn’t need one big power in charge. They don’t need a king with a standing army. They want to make their own choices and have freedoms to not conform to whatever America wants and the attitudes Americans show to disregard that will is garnering response.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Why do some people say "I wouldn't want a government to dictate what I eat"? This would mean they'd be against food safety regulations, would it not?⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  Statement wise “I don’t want the government to tell me what to eat” or variations could mean basically anything. Most of the time it’s posturing on behalf of the idea that a lack of government regulation is a good thing which ignores a rather bloody history of food suppliers adulterating food with harmful substances in the name of preservation / cheapening production cost or using production practices that cause the likelihood of contamination of food.

  Once you scratch the surface of the argument you can usually figure out more exactly what they mean and it often isn’t things like government subsidy programs publishing food pyramids based on shady science and economics rather than in the interest of health.

  Often it’s based out of perceived personal inconvenience or the appearance of moral judgement such as when there’s some sort of health labelling initiative.

  In Canada there are a lot of things that are not considered legal additives for food that are used in the US and the difference in strictness is in part because the Health care system in Canada is funded publicly. Producers of foodstuffs cost the government money directly if whatever they put in it has no nutritional value and causes known health problems. Rather than let companies create messes and tragedies which the government is on the hook to clean up when people’s health fails they remove the issue at it’s source. In the US there’s less incentive as these costs become scattered in the form of individual medical bills and oftentimes the savings are from food being shelf stable for longer. Shrugging one’s shoulders at the fallout or claiming its an exercise of “freedom” is in service to those who make money hand over fist.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨There's a noticable influx of trans kids in my job. Are there any topics I should avoid or considerations I should take into account when training them?⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  Hey, Non-binary trans masc person in trades here.

  I can tell you how I perceive different types of co-worker if it helps you want to dial in what it’s like on the other side of the experience. There’s layers to the whole situation and as non-binary folks we understand what we are asking for isn’t automatically going to click and requires people to figure us out.

  First up : Most of us end of day aren’t going to rock the boat for anything less than fully agregious behaviour so calls to report other people for being mildly offensive are probably not actually going to go anywhere. Most of us are scared of being labelled “a problem” so we just take the hits when they come. If you are a boss and notice a non-binary person sticking closer to specific people and avoiding others there’s a good chance that they’ve found the people who are safe and avoiding ones who aren’t. A great accommodation that can invisibly help is just to recognize this strata and if a task nessesitates putting people together try and pair along these lines. A lot of co-workers wait until other people aren’t around to let their nastier behaviour shine.

  Now to co-worker types. Aside from the full on transphobe or problem persons there’s a range of different stages of cool people.

  The “I don’t really get it” Co-worker pays lip service to the polite aspects of using pronouns. They are the type to introduce you to others by misgendering you and then flap their hands and go “Oh no sorry ‘they’”. We know they don’t get it or don’t really care. The misgendering still hurts but they are fairly benign. They make these accidents non maliciously and are afforded grace. If they step in it we basically disregard because they aren’t really worth the effort of getting too comfortable around. We make these accommodations for strangers daily. Annoying but nessisary.

  The “in training” co-worker is one whom is encountering their very first trans person. They want you to be their Obi wan and their enthusiasm is a bit of a double edged sword at times. It’s tiring to teach people to dance when they keep stepping on your feet but the job needs doing. Some of us veiw this as our own brand of service to the cause of normalizing ourselves more widely. Some of us just don’t want to be bothered. Either way, just wanting to learn is heaps better than ambivalence. If you fuck up something, don’t make a big deal about it. It’s not that you’re a terrible person and should have known better. Our stuff takes practice and we know it’s not intuitive.

  The “A little too up in our shit” co-worker is excited to know the real you but looks at you as a beautiful creature in need of preservation. They might seek to advocate on your behalf or behind your back but the attempt is clumsy and often at odds with a non-binary person’s desire to just get through the workday as a regular human and not make waves. Good enthusiasm sure, we’re probably friends but for the love of God we’re adults and we can sort out our own shit if need be.

  The “Understands the Assignment” co-worker is just comfortable to be around. They don’t have to be the most tuned in to all the nuance about our specific needs in ways we require more out of partners, family and friends but they treat our basic requirements as no big deal, maybe they occasionally ask questions to check in if they catch us struggling or reacting but aren’t going to narc to the boss on our behalf. They either avoid all stereotypes associated with sex or in the case of trans mascs/trans femmes they treat us like one of the boys/girls. Gold standard.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Anon measures up⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  Yeah as a bottom with a large partner with delayed ejaculation I can say that while people seem to value length and stamina/lasting power in porn… the reality is there’s advantages to not accidentally knocking the absolute stuffing out of your partner and tiring them to the bone whenever you do the deed.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Anon measures up⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  Aight, so whomever needs to hear this. The average vaginal canal is only about 3-4 inches long and might lengthen to about 5 inches if relaxed. Despite what bad porn anatomy might tell you it can hurt to go deeper than that. All of the nerve endings are clustered at the opening.

  The prostate is two inches deep. Virtually all the same mechanics apply.

  Your penis is fine.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨How do children address a non-binary parent?⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  Very individualized as per need. Non-binary is an umbrella term for a whole bunch of different situations so what feels right is going to be very different for someone who feels like say a mix of masculine and feminine versus someone who has dysphoric reactions to any and all gender markers. It’s going to be different for someone whose identity is more static than say someone who fluidly bounces between extremes.

  If you know someone who is non-binary that’s essentially just the tip of the iceberg of a whole discussion about how they personally interact with their body or the culture of gender. I’ve heard of mixes of Mom/Dad for bigender people, just Mom or Dad for trans masc/femme folk, Completely new words that do not have cultural baggage, or just “my parent”. It’s not a one size fits all situation.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨How do children address a non-binary parent?⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  I’ve heard “Mawpaw” for a bigender person before which sounds kind of delightfully southern.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Trump, in blue, sleeping at Pope Francis' finera;l⁩ ⁨⁨4⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  But there are a lot of things that exist that aren’t exactly friendly. People often hinge their belief or disbelief in any divinity singularly on the bible. They consider proof of God existing is based on whether all the claims made in an old book are true.

  Not saying that means anyone should start praying. The God as listed in the Bible given their behaviour does not seem either omniscient, omnipotent or benevolent but those ideals have shaped a lot of the discussion about whether something classifies as a “true” God or not. A lot of thought and debate goes towards squaring that circle. Sometimes the easiest answer is that lies exist. The presense of other gods are noted in the bible. Maybe that one was just a super powered Narcissist.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Trump, in blue, sleeping at Pope Francis' finera;l⁩ ⁨⁨4⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  Technically that would be a defense if the god in question was actually as powerful as they say they are or that they are nessisarily good. There is always a possibility that Gods exist but are not on the hook to tell the truth and their goals do not align with humans.

  A lying god telling the kids they have magic powers well beyond them and proving it like an uncle playing a dumb trick on the three year olds at a family reunion is a possibility. Maybe God exists and is just kind of an ass?

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Transitioning in STEM⁩ ⁨⁨4⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  Trans masc person checking in. Might be my bias or community or something but I get way less misgendering by guys under 30 than basically any other demographic. They seem to pick it up faster and be really chill about it in ways that a lot of the women in my life really don’t seem to get as comfortable with.

  But there is definitely a part of my brain that sees men as being of my tribe in ways that women are not. Like not to say that I don’t have incredible women in my life whom I have incredibly close bonds with… But there’s definitely some kind of cognitive distance that has always kind of been there.

  I think trans femmes might experience a similar situation with feeling accepted by women but to answer your question about if the bros are alright… Yeah, they good.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨I had no idea y cunt was this powerful⁩ ⁨⁨4⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  Bit of a funny insult calling someone a bulk cardboard box for shipping (ie Gaylord).

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨I had no idea y cunt was this powerful⁩ ⁨⁨4⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  If you look at the history of the word “man” from it’s origin it was originally a gender neutral term. You had to append a modifier (were or wif) on it to specify gender. Over time this eroded and people stopped using “wereman” to mean masculine people and just started using the default phrase that meant everybody but sorta kept “wifman” and changed the pronunciation.

  So if you peel back the history women are indeed 100% man because everyone is a man.

  Also in the category of gender neutral once : “Girl” used to just meant “child” and “boy” meant something along the line of “young ruffian”.