SeeMarkFly
@SeeMarkFly@lemmy.ml
- Comment on Annoying neighbor 3 days ago:
LOL. Comments are turned OFF.
They don’t care or they already know?
- Comment on Annoying neighbor 3 days ago:
What you are looking for is jazz lessons.
For jazz, you play the instrument is such a way that the listener wants to take it away from you.
Very effective.
- Comment on Me too, outlet......me too. 1 week ago:
And it’s a GFI (Ground Fault Interrupter) outlet.
Factory defect or electrician defect?
- Comment on vacation 1 week ago:
A.I. should be able to help you with that. Polymarket betting on it will give you a clue if you guessed it right.
- Comment on vacation 1 week ago:
I went to therapy and found a bunch of NEW things that I was (successfully) suppressing.
I PAID to have MORE problems. I can’t afford ME.
- Comment on vacation 1 week ago:
To go to a doctor, I have to be too weak to resist. Takes about two weeks.
- Comment on The secret to happiness is living in the moment and not fearing the future 1 week ago:
I have rubbed elbows with some rich people. They all had very shallow lives.
Isn’t that funny, you can have ANYTHING you want and you can’t figure out what you want?
- Comment on The secret to happiness is living in the moment and not fearing the future 1 week ago:
Ever wonder why artists are always poor?
Money robs you of creativity, initiative, drive, passion, faith…no worries.
- Comment on The secret to happiness is living in the moment and not fearing the future 1 week ago:
When you have that much money, you don’t have friends.
You never know if they like you or your money and you’re afraid it’s the latter.
- Comment on The secret to happiness is living in the moment and not fearing the future 1 week ago:
Some people are so poor, all they have is money.
- Comment on We're so back 3 weeks ago:
One question: HOW do you “develop” natural immunity.
Answer: The weak ones in the herd DIE!
- Comment on If they're wet farts would the suit eventually start to rust? 4 weeks ago:
Farts In particular, what to say after you fart in a crowd (or elevator).
“Take that!”
“What do you say?” like prompting a child to say thank you.
“That’ll be five bucks, you pervert”
“Not a bad sound out of a half inch speaker”
“Did you hear that spider bark?"
“Someone step on a duck?”
“That duck’s got bad breath”
Forest Area Reticulated Tree Spiders (FARTS)
“A bit more choke and that engine will start”
“Did you hear what that asshole just said?”
“There’s someone behind me talking shit!”
“Keep shouting Sir, we’ll find you”
“So sayeth the King”
“I shouldn’t have trusted that one”
“I don’t remember eating that.”
“That’s gonna itch when it dries”
‘‘Two sniffs of that would be greedy’’
“The the horns working, now try the lights”
“Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk”
“The Rear Admiral has spoken”
(Just before you fart) “Alexa, play something by Ed Sheeran”
“Don’t worry, (name), I’ll tell them it was me!”
“You’ve/I’ve got a turd honking for the right of way.”
“Ahh, the ghost of dinners past”
“You got that one for free, next one you will have to pull my finger”
“As foretold by The Prophecy.”
“Now your turn”
The toothless one speaks !
“Sounds much better after my tune up”
“Aaaand…scene!”
“That was supposed to be a song but came out of the wrong end”
“Message from turd castle”
“Glad I’m not in my Space Suit”
“Damn! I was saving that for the elevator”
“An empty house is better than a bad tenant”
“Guess what I had for my last meal”
“This haaause is noww cleeeean”
“carpet frogs”
“Now that I have your attention, we will have a moment of silence for all those that have died in elevator accidents”
- Comment on Wasted potential. 1 month ago:
I finally figure out jazz.
The musician plays the instrument in such a way that the listener wants to take it away.
Easy.
- Comment on I have a plan 1 month ago:
I didn’t pay extra for the French checks. Just regular American checks are good enough for me.
- Comment on I have a plan 1 month ago:
Will you take a check?
- Comment on EU vs USA 1 month ago:
…yet.
- Comment on Scientists uncovered the nutrients bees were missing — Colonies surged 15-fold 1 month ago:
Viagra for bees. Who’d thought.
- Comment on I do this on behalf of soup 2 months ago:
Even more efficient is to just dump the soup in the toilet and FLUSH.
- Comment on I do this on behalf of soup 2 months ago:
I don’t care for soup. It seems like food but it has too much water.
Soggy food.
- Comment on how do you only sleep 3 hours a day? (inspiration) 2 months ago:
If you dream that you are sleeping can you sleep twice as fast?
- Comment on Genius. 2 months ago:
I like toast but I don’t like MAKING toast.
I would like to buy a loaf of toast. Then I could just warm it up in the microwave.
- Comment on Gaysadilla 2 months ago:
Gayzpacho… damn, that’s cold
This is the kind of rhetoric that energizes the bouillabaisse.
How dare she blame Gayzpacho, when we all know that Vichyssoise Violence is the real culprit.
Imagine how confused the waiter must have been at the restaurant when she sent her Gayzpacho soup back and demanded to see the manager because it was cold. The manager said “Use your Jewish space laser to heat the soup up.” All part of the luxury gay space communism agenda
Simmer down, everyone. Romaine calm. Sometimes, we all bake mistakes.
BREAKING: Hungary has invaded and occupied Turkey! It has changed its country’s name to “Full”
- Comment on [deleted] 2 months ago:
Are they making a “prize” for Trump to accept?
- Comment on Operation Mar-Kwane 2 months ago:
Markwayne Mullin, Trump’s new PRICK for Homeland Security secretary.
- Comment on Old Yeller Style 2 months ago:
She NEVER saw the bus.
- Comment on war with Iran has been delayed 2 months ago:
An Army marches on its stomach. The Navy marches to the Poop Deck.
- Comment on Do it for your country's debt! 3 months ago:
Yes, somebody is really messed up. How many guesses do I get?
- Comment on Do it for your country's debt! 3 months ago:
This is a real doctor. Too confusing or not funny. beautybydrcat.com
- Comment on Do it for your country's debt! 3 months ago:
Dr. Oz will kill you.
Dr. Phil will take all your money.
RFK Jr. LOOKS sick. Don’t take health advice from sick people.
- Comment on Do it for your country's debt! 3 months ago:
Doc Johnson
LOL How did I miss that one.
THANKS for playing!