And that’s why I like the “disappointing, good, awesome” scale. You only have three options and people generally know where to sort things.
Just Average
Submitted 3 weeks ago by fossilesque@mander.xyz to science_memes@mander.xyz
https://mander.xyz/pictrs/image/914bcb86-d4a2-45c8-aebc-b8c99fac0509.png
Comments
pennomi@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
Apytele@sh.itjust.works 3 weeks ago
It also helps clearly define the key interventions for each. All of these kind of apply to all of them but there’s a few key points for each it can help to focus on.
Disappointing: don’t brag about it but also don’t try to undersell yourself either - focus on your pregame:
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actively listen for what your target finds appealing, particularly in terms of “the five love languages,” touch, praise, gifts, service, and time. Identify the target’s preferred top two (ideally top 1) and focus your efforts there. 90% of the average woman’s sexual satisfaction is going to occur before her pants even come off anyway and you have the opportunity to make that your strength.
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Average: nail down “the motion of the ocean” (roll your hips) and learning to slow it down.
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if your dick has a curve to it, try to pick positions that will poke the tip of your dick into the g-spot in the front wall of her vagina. If your dick curves up towards your head, you want her facing you, so missionary or cowgirl. If your dick curves down towards your feet, you want doggy or reverse cowgirl (but be careful with reverse cowgirl if she’s taking you all the way out and back in too fast / hard she can actually damage your dick. The side curves are a bit tricky so what you wanna do is get her on her side facing the direction your dick curves while you straddle her bottom leg and put that top leg up around your hip on the side she’s facing. (y’all gonna get me breaking out the dolls LOL). That said, this is just gonna be your “classic” position. Make sure you still mix it up a bit; variety is the spice of life, and obviously listen to your partner FIRST, if she tells you she’s got a fave try to stick with that and just try this one once or twice to see if it does it for her.
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stop masturbating as much except for rubbing one out about 24h before you anticipate having sex. You’ll last longer and seem less desperate and have better focus in the leadup.
“Awesome” - you’re not allowed to do doggystyle, either of the cowgirls, or put her legs over her head unless she looks like a literal Amazon or has explicitly told you that she is a size queen. You only get to do missionary, reverse missionary (her on top but laying down over you) or lotus (you sitting with her on your lap with legs around your hips).
flicker@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
I’m a woman. This person has the absolute best advice.
The man I’m with currently has nailed my interests so hard I’m halfway to creaming my jeans before he even kisses me. And I’ve never ever ever experienced anything like it.
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Valmond@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
I feel a “really good” could fit in there.
thefartographer@lemm.ee 3 weeks ago
Well, of course. If it’s described as “really good,” I think we can assume it fits.
If it doesn’t fit or proves too be too painful, I guess that falls more towards “disappointing,” but that feels like a misnomer
ayyy@sh.itjust.works 3 weeks ago
Yea but en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Net_promoter_score is marketer pseudoscience that gets taken waaaaaaay too far by dumb executives all the time.
xthexder@l.sw0.com 3 weeks ago
How likely are you to recommend Comcast to a friend?
Bitch, you’re a monopoly, I would leave if I could.
MonkderVierte@lemmy.ml 3 weeks ago
I rather have 1-5.
fartsparkles@sh.itjust.works 3 weeks ago
Mean, median, or mode?
MystikIncarnate@lemmy.ca 3 weeks ago
Exactly. This rambling nonsense is basically just the response I would expect from “tell me you don’t understand averages, without telling me you don’t understand averages”
chickenf622@sh.itjust.works 3 weeks ago
Did a new copypasta just drop?
Quik@infosec.pub 2 weeks ago
Ohhhh, I desperately want this to happen!
BeepTheJeep@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
phenomenon
SoylentBlake@lemm.ee 3 weeks ago
That’s the standard issue. Helmet on soldier, you wanna live forever?
propter_hog@hexbear.net 3 weeks ago
Dude’s seriously mansplaining small dingdong
ayyy@sh.itjust.works 3 weeks ago
MagicShel@programming.dev 3 weeks ago
Rated by a review board? 4 out of 5 dentists? One fucking girl who doesn’t want it anyway?
My wife loves my cock in every hole and that’s the only review that matters to me.
ShinkanTrain@lemmy.ml 3 weeks ago
This is a Wendy’s
thefartographer@lemm.ee 3 weeks ago
I’ll have what he’s having
frezik@midwest.social 3 weeks ago
Not anymore. Now it’s a swingers commune.