I support men making their own support groups.
While women are allowed to keep men out of their groups, it doesn’t work the other way around. Even gay men’s groups have trouble keeping invasive women from changing the nature of their groups.
Comment on Dude read the rules of woman only community and decided to post anyway
Wren@lemmy.today 7 hours ago
Oh good. I don’t follow this com, another comment tipped me off.
While I do enjoy a little bit of chaos and schadenfreude, it would be nice to block out user names. Call out the mistake, not the person.
Most people here are lovely, but it only takes one match to start a fire. Might as well address some bullshit in these comments since I’m gonna get trolled by incels anyway…
side note: I’m not a mod there.
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The women’s com is trans and non-binary inclusive. Anyone who feels at home there (and is respectful) is welcome.
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It’s not all bitching about men. Looking at the last twenty posts, one was about men and two were related to men. We talk about pads and health and essays and positivity memes and do fun activities on fridays.
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I support men making their own support groups. Although the internet itself often feels like a menfolk support group(to me,) I’m sure there are plenty of things an easy to find, curated space, could offer men who want to be just a little more vulnerable, knowing they would be supported by the mods if any toxic women came in to devalue their opinions and experience.
ronl2k@lemmy.world 5 hours ago
TipRing@lemmy.world 2 hours ago
I haven’t noticed anything like this online. I only one time saw a woman post in a MSM community and it was to ask a question, which was fine.
Wren@lemmy.today 3 hours ago
As you can see, women have trouble keeping men out, too.
I’d like to see your data.
ronl2k@lemmy.world 3 hours ago
I’d like to see your data.
Just try finding a men’s opinion group that successfully bans women.
Wren@lemmy.today 3 hours ago
So you don’t have data.
Wolf314159@startrek.website 5 hours ago
Whataboutism is a non-sequitor that disrupts and discourages productive discussion.
TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world 7 hours ago
They should. the issue with this is they get branded as hate-groups.
zqps@sh.itjust.works 2 hours ago
I consider myself a feminist and I vehemently disagree with that take, nor does it reflect in any way the commonly held views in the relevant communities.
Women and men are people. All people hold the capacity for good and evil within them. The real differences are 1) our respective socialization, and 2) the way we are perceived and treated by society based on our gender. That’s not an individual issue, but a systemic one.
I’ve been part of a few support groups for men that regularly received appreciation from women specifically because they were aimed at helping men in recognition of this fact, and thus didn’t revolve into inceldom and gender war nonsense.
Glytch@lemmy.world 3 hours ago
A lot of male-only spaces descend into places to hate on women rather than proactively dealing with issues within our own community. It takes active moderation for these support groups to not become hate groups. If it stays focused on healthy self improvement (not hawking supplements and talking about a person being high or low “value”) and providing emotional support for men, it can avoid the “hate group” moniker.
The “loser” thing is actually a symptom of why we need spaces like we’re talking about. There will likely always be people out there who judge people for needing help and emotional support, especially men(thank you toxic masculinity), but the goal should be an overall less toxic society and greater acceptance that everyone needs help at some point.
Your “bigger issue” is not something I think I have experienced, I don’t think I’ve ever had someone assume I’m evil because I’m male. That sounds like an internal belief that you’re projecting on society, something that should be looked at in detail and questioned thoroughly in a therapeutic setting. Looking at other comments you’ve made on similar subjects, you seem to be someone who needs a place where your views can be safely challenged by reality, which is another way of saying we need better support groups for men like you, not just incel groups where you reinforce each other’s toxic beliefs.
I understand that this may come off as insulting, I just want you to know that that’s not my intent. I think you are lacking in self worth and that is leading you to project toxicity into the world. I don’t think you’re hopeless, mostly because I used to be on a similar course as you. I got therapy and learned to better love and value myself and I started seeing a lot more positivity in my interactions with people of all genders. The first step is wanting to change things.
groet@feddit.org 7 minutes ago
I think the “men evil”, “woman good” is just worded to strongly but is generally true (not actually true, but people considered it to be true).
Its more “men dangerous”, “men threatening” and not “evil”. A man in a women’s bathroom is a threat. A women in a mans bathroom is there because there was a line for the woman’s bathroom. The actual reason for those scenarios does not matter, the man will be seen as an invasion and a perpetrator. I have personally experienced examples of neutral situations as well (going to the woman’s bathroom as a man without negative reactions) but the general discourse about the topic is pretty clear.
stevedice@sh.itjust.works 6 hours ago
Don’t make them a hate-group for losers, then? This speaks more about the places you’re hanging out.
tree_frog_and_rain@lemmy.world 5 hours ago
There are support groups for men out there that are not generally charectirized as toxic. Toxic folks may attack men for going to them, but I can tell you before I transitioned I used to go to one, and that wasn’t something I ever experienced.
Wren@lemmy.today 7 hours ago
Hello, incel/femcel/themcel #1! You just made all that up.
AceSLive@lemmy.world 7 hours ago
Wow. That was rude and disingenuous.
stevedice@sh.itjust.works 5 hours ago
Calling out shitty people isn’t rude.
HK65@sopuli.xyz 7 hours ago
You could be more supportive. Men have issues specifically hurting them too, and not dismissing that fact won’t make women’s issues less relevant.
Could we just be more supportive to each other?
Wren@lemmy.today 6 hours ago
Absolutely! It’s why I encourage support spaces for everyone. I’m calling out the irony that this user is arguing up and down this thread arguing against the women’s community and spouting female priveledge idology, while now complaining that men can’t have the same thing… or else people will complain and spout male priveledge ideology.
There are many ways that sexism hurts men, which is why I encourage support spaces and actively discourage all men bullshit when I see it.
Claiming those spaces doomed from the start, because of people behaving exactly like Tittyfrog here, is bad faith as hell.
TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world 6 hours ago
because that would be gay.
it’s manly/womanly to beat up on other people and harass them for their issues and problems.
SailorFuzz@lemmy.world 4 hours ago
oh hey, it’s the person what from the op screen cap. Here doing an encore performance. Everyone clap.
Wren@lemmy.today 3 hours ago
Thank you! I have mental health problems so even negative attention is fulfilling.
AND I don’t think rehashing someone’s mistake for public theater is cool without the user names removed. People were shitting all over him when he already got clapped back, so I said something.