grysbok
@grysbok@lemmy.sdf.org
I’m a systems librarian in an academic library. I moved over the Lemmy after Rexxit 2023. I’ve had an account on sdf.org since 2009 (under a different username), and so I chose this instance out of a sense of nostalgia. I do all sorts of fiber arts (knitting, cross stitch, sewing) and love dogs.
- Comment on How am I supposed to decide who to vote for in local elections? 4 weeks ago:
This last election, I googled the candidates and voted for the ones that hadn’t tried to ban books at the local library.
- Comment on You're lucky I'm here 4 weeks ago:
I finally found a job that I enjoy and isn’t wicked stressful. I’m looking forward to going in on Monday to fix a bug that reared its head over the weekend. It’s lovely.
My previous job had little downtime, lots of deadlines, and paid more. I took mental health days a lot.
Current job pays 2/3 as much and I love it. I don’t call out nearly as often.
- Comment on Does anyone drink instant coffee anymore? 8 months ago:
I do. I left my pour-over coffee maker at the office, so I make do with instant coffee. It’s… ok, if I drown it in almond milk.
- Comment on Thinking of visiting a pawn shop. What should I know? 8 months ago:
TBF you just described most of capitalism.
I don’t need a gun, but the pawn shop on my commute has some musical instruments in the window which intrigue me. I’m a serial hobby-starter, and prefer gently used hobby tools over new, because used items have less of an environmental impact than new items.
- Submitted 8 months ago to [deleted] | 29 comments
- Comment on Is there a title (Mr/Ms/Mrs) that is gender neutral? 10 months ago:
I grew up with Mrs and Ms pronounced nearly the same, so I get the pronunciation confusion.
- Comment on Is there a title (Mr/Ms/Mrs) that is gender neutral? 10 months ago:
I’m wicked sorry, I don’t have a good answer. You could try Mx and see how it feels. I’ve dropped sir/ma’am for folks that I know, or that appear my age or younger. I still use it for older folks I don’t know out in the wild.
I, personally, never take offense at being misgendered in a Southern accent if I’m called “ma’am”. I grew up in the South and to me it just feels like someone’s trying their best to be polite and I take it as intended. Sometimes I also just misparse it as “man”, which feels a bit informal, but whatevs. Miss still feels creepy, but I get that less now that I’ve hit 30.
If you’re working at a drive through where there’s a customer/service worker dynamic, I’d 1. go with ma’am or sir 2. accept it if someone corrects you, and 3. recognize you’re more likely to be yelled at by someone for using a ‘new-fangled honorific’ than for misgendering someone.
- Comment on Is there a title (Mr/Ms/Mrs) that is gender neutral? 10 months ago:
Not really. There’s plenty of gender-neutral names, some you wouldn’t expect. The names Ashley, Chris, Harper, Morgan, and Stacey are all gender-ambiguous^Showing my white American background with this list^. Plus, people can have genders that don’t match their name.
- Comment on Is there a title (Mr/Ms/Mrs) that is gender neutral? 10 months ago:
Seconding the honorific “Mx”. From what I’ve seen, it’s decently well-adopted in the non-binary community. I’ve not seen it much used outside of that community–it seems to be used mostly when someone ‘needs’ and honorific but doesn’t fit into the 1950s list.
IRL, I’ve used “Hey, you” and “Yo!” when hollering at folks I don’t know (example, “Yo! You dropped something!”)
Sidenote: As a nonbinary person, I prefer not being given an honorific over being given the wrong one.
Minirant not directed at OP: And omg, if you need to go with a feminine honorific and you don’t know whether the person is married, go with Ms, not Mrs. or Miss. The connotations of the wrong one are just creepy. Not married and called Mrs=“Hey, you’re too old to be unmarried. Please feel judged about your relationship status” Married and called Miss=“Hey, you’re too young to be married. Please feel like I don’t respect you as an adult.” In all cases Ms=“I don’t know and/or care about your marital status and I’m trying to be polite”