Draegur

@Draegur@lemmy.zip

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨happy international womens day💜⁩ ⁨⁨5⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago⁩:

  I’m sorry, It turns out I’m not a man u.u

  But that does explain why I was so turned off at the prospect of getting sucked (yuck) Because this junk on me is the wrong parts!

  The most fun relationships I’ve had, my own body was hardly even acknowledged and I made it all about what I can do for my partner ^^

  Besides, receiving sexual gratification of any kind is aggressively mid to me anyway, because I’m pretty sure I’m on the asexual spectrum.

  I want to please my partners solely because I’m panromantic and when anyone i love has a good time i get the warm fuzzy giddy mushy sappy tingles~ :3

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨the world⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  Real Life.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨bold words⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩:

  Oh I’m not a girl either.

  I’m an it: a THING. :3

  The big revelation i had in recent years is that although i may not know what i am, i know what I’m not.

  I wasted decades living like a fish who was tricked into thinking its life’s purpose was to climb trees.

  I could have spared myself a great deal of inconvenience and confusion if i had realized sooner that I’m asexual and genderless because divesting of those labels has drastically reduced the discomfort of my existence in that i no longer feel bizarre self-inflicted pressure to fulfill archetypical roles toward which i never related and which I never understood in the first place.

  A lot of social issues i had came from externalization of internal dysphoria. The deep, overwhelming disgust and discomfort I felt when merely even conceptualizing masculinity that purports to be ‘mine’, let alone any actual participation in such an identity. Being in “boy” spaces, being present for “boy” events, every stereotype and statistically emergent pattern associated with maleness, all of it–ALL OF IT–made my skin crawl.

  The utter revulsion that overwhelmed me regarding masculinity spilled over into how I treated others, and that absolutely sucked. It’s not their fault they had an intrinsic understanding of themselves that felt intuitive and made sense to them…

  …

  And also even though I don’t particularly feel interested in pretending to be a girl either i know i definitely would be more comfortable in a more androgynous body. I even want bottom surgery, not for anyone else’s sake but because it feels less wrong conceptually.

  (Not holding my breath though)

  I just sometimes think back to the 90s and wonder if i could’ve had more room in my head for more useful considerations if I hadn’t been preoccupied with an intrinsic inability to embody societal expectations and roles that, it turns out, had nothing to do with me. If i didn’t waste so much effort trying to care about something that i hated and turned out to not matter at all, goodness, i could’ve known myself so much better, been at least somewhat more comfortable in my own head if not in my own skin.

  If future me had conveyed the message convincingly in just those three words that no good would come from struggling to participate with that miserable dead-end charade… maybe i could have better focused on things that did matter.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨bold words⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩:

  first choice:
  PURSUE NUCLEAR ENGINEERING

  runner up:
  YOU AIN’T MALE

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨SERIOUSLY THOUGH. WELCOME TO LEMMY.⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩:

  It’s neat here.

  I’m actually here more often than on Reddit now.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩:

  Gesicht wie ein Telefonbuch.
  Absolut nutzlos.
  Nicht mal als Toilettenpapier taugt sie.
  Höchstens als Zunder geeignet.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩:

  Backpfeifengesicht.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨the wok agenda⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  The cool thing about Barq for me, though, is that it functions as a proximity IFF transponder–or at least that’s how i think of it

  because it shows you other furries within range. hypothetically speaking, if there IS a “local furry community” you’d want to connect with, some of them MIGHT be on Barq.

  Like, by default, any fur you end up talking to on barq is going to be within hanging out / getting food / social activity range.

  Just kinda wish it was a little easier to pitch group activities to the local area. I’d absolutely be interested in knowing if there’s any such events happening nearby but as it presently stands i have to actively search through fragnented and static message boards where the proximity feature has no presence, and there may be boards for your area that are not obviously named because the board names are user defined… And frankly, i have too much going on to set aside time for commiting to in-depth perusal on a regular basis where i might not even find out about anything actionable most of the time.

  If the fediverse had an optional “see users near me in dirtspace” feature … I don’t think anyone would use it??? I dunno it just feels like the “meeting up with people” task and goal NEED to be compartmentalized to a specific system for that purpose so you can cut it loose entirely at a moments notice without destroying everything…

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨the wok agenda⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  I use barq!

  sadly it isn’t terribly effective because there’s way too much friction when it comes to local interaction

  two people have to like each other first before they can even say hi? that’s like … literally the opposite of how meeting people works though???

  that isn’t to say that DMs should be unlocked but rather that there oughtta be a localized/proximity public channel where you can just sorta microblog to the void and others who are nearby enough to see it can comment.

  i’d call that system “howling”. kinda like the twilight bark from the old animated 101 Dalmatians movie ^_^

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Anon is all smiles⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  they were taught to by the pedophile billionaires who had a hand in shaping the ‘culture’ of Pol.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨[deleted]⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago⁩:

  i dunno if it’s the same one, but the feelings OP described are how I felt about bronies.

  there was a time before the infestation of predators took hold when almost every person you’d meet among them was unflinchingly, unashamedly, relentlessly wholesome, sincere, and genuine. people who really took honesty, loyalty, kindness, and generosity to heart. but that kind of environment was not hostile enough to defend itself from exploitation. an object lesson in the paradox of tolerance: there are some things that no society will survive tolerating, and there truly are some behaviors that cannot be rehabilitated. there is hardly anyone around anymore from the height of the subculture around 2014…

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Tips⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago⁩:

  Blankets are great because you only have to pay for them once, and now that you have them, they can keep you warm basically forever.

  Now, when it’s HOT weather, fuck it I’m using electricity for air conditioning; it’s getting legitimately dangerously hot lately and THAT SHIT is what will kill me if I don’t pay up x.x

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Tips⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago⁩:

  I’d say it’s because consumerism is a kind of brain rot all its own. The media landscape we’ve been living in for generations has sold us this ridiculous fantasy that happiness means owning (or at least temporarily renting) luxury goods.

  The plurality, if not majority, of the population here has never had to adjust their expectations or really sit down and think hard about what’s actually worth acquiring. We treat desires for convenience and novelty as though they are necessities. But they aren’t.

  What’s actually a necessity is having something fulfilling to occupy your time, as a counterbalance to keep you sane, and that activity does not HAVE to be of the sort that costs a lot of money. Take up art using cheap supplies–just sketch with standard number two pencils on white lined notebook paper or perhaps play music on improvised instruments made of household objects. It doesn’t have to be good in order to become meaningful and if you do it enough it’ll BECOME good. Walk outside when the weather happens to be nice. Learn to ride a bicycle again. Visit a library. Pretend to sword fight with a friend using a fallen tree branch. You don’t have to drop several grand on a resort vacation. You don’t have to go into debt for a fancy car. You don’t need to buy the latest edition of “triple a” micro transaction slop from so-called “studios” that don’t give one single solitary wet shart about actual creativity and fire all their devs immediately every time a project wraps.

  Money can’t buy whimsy.

  All it can do is, at best, remove obstacles from between you and being able to enjoy something. If it’s not being used to simplify your life, then it’s COMPLICATING your life: Giving you only empty distraction that does not provide your experience with any fertile ground for meaning. This is but one of the many ways we are socially “poisoned” and then told that conspicuous consumption is the antidote. It’s not. it’s just even more poison.

  You know what the most enjoyable experience I had was in the past several months? Just sitting in the living room at a gathering of friends where everyone brought a little home made food and listening to their happy voices. It cost me next to nothing but turned out to be worth more than anything.

  My computer is more than ten whole years old now but it handles old games i could find on sale just dandy and doesn’t need some suped-up rtx gpu to let me pirate some shows XD

  I stopped mindlessly gorging myself on junk food, and now basically only eat either efficient daily maintenance nutrition OR choose to visit a small locally owned restaurant no more than once per week. I’m never spending upwards of fifteen fucking dollars on a fast food burger “meal” ever again.

  Divest of tacky opulence. Defy Wall Street and its siren song of ruin disguised as prosperity. Embrace the elegance of simplicity and spontaneity. If this sprawling parasitic infestation we’ve mistaken for an *economy" can’t survive without sucking the life out of us all then maybe it deserves to collapse.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Tips⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago⁩:

  I’ve been losing weight, which has been good for me. But someday … I’m going to run out of stored calories. For the very first time in my life, it has crossed my mind to wonder if I might starve someday ._.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Life pro tip for friends of pharmacists⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago⁩:

  i wonder if hearing people talk about radiation as though it’s an infection that can spread from person to person makes other nuclear enthusiasts twitch as much as it makes me…

  or hearing someone imply that any nuclear reactor can explode in exactly the same manner that an atomic bomb does “by accident”.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨I need to vent about plastic milk jugs⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  huh wow. i was going to presume it was a storage volume quantity calibration of some kind. neat.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  What’s wild is, back when i was a kid and contracted whooping cough (pertussis) i somehow developed an ability to interrupt abdominal contractions–which enabled me to force my body to stop coughing so I could breathe … and this enabled me to halt the vomit until I had a bucket in front of me. So it TRIED to come out every direction, but I was miraculously fortunate enough to have some influence on the sequence.

  Luckily i also had wastebaskets of a solid material composition that could act as buckets without leaking within arms reach and also had managed to dilute the acidity before it started coming up x.x;

  I proceeded to purposefully gulp down water to help flush the pipes out. I think it actually worked because although the experience is thoroughly unpleasant by its very nature, at the very least it seemed the usual peaks of discomfort were significantly blunted.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨[deleted]⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  There is no kind of person who obsessively fixates upon the subject of penises with a frequency or intensity greater than that of a transphobe.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Contain them⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  I use ‘it’ to describe ME :3

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨but like seriously do try it⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  Slowmaxxing my travel ironically makes the journey feel shorter

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨shock and awe⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  Neon (Book Of) Genesis Evangelion

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  The only reason this ain’t me right now is because i got food poisoning a week ago x.x;

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Lemmy and PieFed users in 50 years⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  🧅

  (the style)

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Everyone is so close to grasping your unique vision!⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  Fact: 90% of all leftist infighters MUST quit as a prerequisite before the movement can be capable of revolution, irrespective of “purity”.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Good advice⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  Stop fantasizing about falling in love with literally any person who is nice to you and breaking your own heart.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨I fall for it every year. Every. Year.⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  They are literally those.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨I fall for it every year. Every. Year.⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  If i want McRib, i skip the middle man and just buy q bulk family-size tray/tub of frozen microwaveable riblets and go to fucking TOWN

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Change my mind⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  Not shown: the lower lines that list “Arguing in the Shower” and “Arguing in Your Imagination”, and the bottom line of “Not Arguing At All”

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Is it normal to see this static when you close your eyes?⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  Ohhh yeahhhh the lava lamp like ones are cool. Sometimes vague impressions of cyan and red, sometimes propagating in waves. I’m so glad other people are describing it!

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Want to play the latest multiplayer games? Just go into your bios settings or upgrade your PC if it doesn't have TPM chip.⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  weaponized incompetence exists at basically all levels of human interaction, alas…

  but it’s especially shitty when corpos do it.

  I really wish we’d stop fucking around and make executives regret what the people they are literally responsible for do. Their monetary compensation should be consummate with consequences–if they’re making three thousand times the amount of their front-facing employees they should be three thousand times more culpable for the shit their organization pulls.