Why do I look like shit some days?

Submitted ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩ by ⁨alina@lemmy.world⁩ to ⁨[deleted]⁩

I never like myself, but today I look much worse than usual, even though I haven’t changed anything, the same makeup, the same clothes, however I look at myself in the mirror and look disgusting, I hate that I have to work today, I’m waiting for the working day to end to go home as soon as possible, my mood is so terrible, I don’t want anyone to see my face so damn much. But i just don’t understand what the problem is. When I was in school, I preferred to skip classes on those days.

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jol@discuss.tchncs.de ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
When you look in the mirror, you see yourself through a mood filter. If you are feeling happy and optimistic, you will see a nicer looking reflection.

Besides, small things can effectively change how you look in subtle ways. Are the clothes a bit more wrinkly or need adjustment? Do you need a haircut or shave? Did you sleep well and are you drinking enough water? Also, your body posture is different.

My ex has mood swings related to their body image. One day they thought they looked nice and fit, the other day they looked fat and ugly. To me nothing changed, except that on the bad days, they had bad posture in front of the mirror. Unconsciously, they were self sabotaging themselves.

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taco_daemon@lemmy.zip ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
it may be psychological (that doesn’t mean is not real tho) and that sucks

or it may be because of inflammation, it causes subtle differences in the way you look (specially how you see yourself). most people won’t notice tho

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Nemo@slrpnk.net ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
It’s either you or the day itself. If it’s the day, just wait it out. If it’s you, it’s either your self-perception that’s off, in which case some affirmations or treating yourself to even a small glowup might help; or something has gone subtly wrong, most likely sleep deprivation or dehydration. So drink some water, take a nap, use the nice hair product as a treat, and tell yourself you’re a sexy badass.

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RBWells@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
We are all our own worst critics. Like, when I look at myself all I see is the flaws, right? It’s a kind of dysmorpia.

There are literal good days & bad days of course, bloated or bad hair day, or bad skin day, but they aren’t as extreme as you see them. Nobody else would notice or care.

I was anorexic so I always look fat to myself, it doesn’t matter my size really. You can’t trust the mirror and you don’t see what others do.

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iltoroargento@lemmy.sdf.org ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
I often felt this way in school, through grad school, as well. For me, it would be a bad hair day or just waking up not feeling great about myself and I’d basically just color the whole day in the shitty mood I woke up in and I basically gave up on the day

Definitely a your mileage may vary kind of thing, but for me it was pretty much impossible to reframe my day when I got into that mindset.

I also think being in an environment where I, consciously or unconsciously, felt a need/want to look good to other people (highschool and law school were very like this for me) would put me in that mindset.

I eventually addressed these feelings through a lot of self work and help from a good therapist, but I think age and confidence also played a role/were intertwined in this for me.

Eventually, I didn’t care so much about how I appeared to most others, told my pretentious law job to kick rocks, and became a teacher. I’ve developed even tougher skin through that profession because kids are both freaking hilarious and remarkably brutal. Any form of pretense or GAF kind of energy will be detrimental to honest interactions and teaching in general, so when the kids learn that I’m just here to help them learn and don’t care about clout/drama, it really helps tear down some walls.

Idk, kinda went on a bit there, but basically a lot of what I experienced was due to me caring about how I was perceived and if it wasn’t perfect in my eyes, I gave up. Once I started focusing on honest interactions with others, and moved into a career/life trajectory that supported that focus, I kind of moved away from being so hard on myself.

Some or none of this may apply to you, but I hope this helps a bit and if you’re asking these kinds of “why” questions, you’re already on a good track.

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hayyy@thelemmy.club ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
The planets and the stars probably

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daggermoon@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
If it makes you feel better, we all look like shit at work.

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Kolanaki@pawb.social ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
In my case, I wish it was only some days and not every day 😮‍💨

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zxqwas@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
Your mind is a powerful thing. I’m not saying what you experience is not real, in fact you never experience anything without it being through your mind. It’s a shame we’re not given the operating manual for our minds at birth.

Does it happen on weekends or days when you don’t have to go out too?

And for what it’s worth your eyes look good at least.

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j4k3@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
Becoming a roadie and riding a bike everywhere for years fixed me feeling like this. I had to get over all of my insecurities being in public in a cycling kit. Being around other people riding and racing, it became my normal. Now… I don’t have to look at me, so why the fuck should I care what anyone thinks. They are used to it or whatever, who cares. I’m more interested in inferring their real intelligence versus narcissistic stupidity based on their responses. Old people are all ugly. “For your age” is just an excuse for it. The vanity is boring. People who are judgmental are just projecting their own inadequacy and internal misery.

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