This new job will be different

Comments

• cm0002@lemmy.world ⁨5⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  If you’re lucky, you get told where the SOPs are LMFAO

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  • Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world ⁨5⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Soda Otters Pretzels?

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    • toynbee@lemmy.world ⁨5⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      In case you’re sincerely asking, I believe they’re referring to a series of documents defining the Standard Operating Procedures.

      Your way sounds like more fun.

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    • ObviouslyNotBanana@lemmy.world ⁨5⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Sexy Outfit Peripherals

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• ExcessShiv@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨5⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  OTOH I’ve always found on boarding to be infuriatingly slow and long winded…Yeah i get how to use these systems, I understand the basics of your work flow now let me fucking do some actual work!

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  • MY_ANUS_IS_BLEEDING@lemm.ee ⁨5⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    My most recent job took SIX WEEKS before they started allocating work to me. And they didn’t even have a proper onboarding process - they just sat me down in front of a desk and didn’t know what to do with me. I ended up heading over to their manufacturing area and spending a couple of weeks helping people fuck about fixing things because I was so bored.

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    • jaybone@lemmy.world ⁨5⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Don’t worry. The Department of Government Efficiency is going to make you super efficient very soon.

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• SharkEatingBreakfast@sopuli.xyz ⁨5⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  My last job, they didn’t fully train me because tjey were “too busy”, then when they paid for me to do a live online course at work, they gave me the incorrect machine to work on and the instructor was scolding me the whole time because they couldn’t properly give me directions, while the other students were poking fun at me.

  Not only that, but I had to mute my mic because because my coworkers kept shouting and using loud machinery in the background.

  It was absolutely mortifying.

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  • jaybone@lemmy.world ⁨5⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Once Musk and Swarmadogey offshore your job to China, you won’t have to worry about those pesky training videos.

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• ObviouslyNotBanana@lemmy.world ⁨5⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  There ain’t even a plank to walk

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  • jaybone@lemmy.world ⁨5⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    We’re gonna have the best planks. Everyone says so.

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• Sparky@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨5⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  I remember my first job at McDonald’s, and this was literally their onboarding. Didn’t watch any videos or anything. They just asked:“you know how to make a burger right?” to someone who never eats at any fastfood place. That was a rough week

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  • Lemminary@lemmy.world ⁨5⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    That explains why their burgers only resemble the concept of a burger.

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