Anon tries to eat betterSubmitted 1 year ago by setsneedtofeed@lemmy.world to greentext@sh.itjust.works
https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/0657363e-7903-4679-8439-9450bf06a8c4.jpeg
The anal air pistol is a very real phenomenon and has produced the smoothest shits of my life. It’s a maglev, suspending your every log and nugget upon decadently luxurious tufts of air. I’m convinced it never even touches my colon based on the sheer level of comfort.
I’ve tried desperately to replicate it, everything from binging cabbage to kegal sealing my rectum to offer my body as a pressurized flesh methane tank, but it’s vexingly difficult to perfect. It is my brown whale.
Your writing is great, but your descriptive talents would be appreciated elsewhere.
Don’t worry, I already browse !thefarside@sh.itjust.works
Welcome to the high fiber club anon.
It works not because it makes you feel fuller. It works because you’re afraid to eat anything because you’re just reloading your fiber ass cannon.
I cut out dairy as a lifelong vegetarian a little over a year ago, and the biggest difference is my shits (I can’t digest animal fat very well, but didn’t realize that I also can’t digest animal based fats well either, so YMMV). I have clean, fast, effortless shits every time, and they’re huge (maybe you’re an adult, but there’s something satisfying about taking a giant shit for me).
Why are these unruly bowels stories always so poetic? Lol they get me every time
shalafi@lemmy.world 1 year ago
Jesus Christ I haven’t laughed that hard in weeks.
ringwraithfish@startrek.website 1 year ago
Glad I’m not the only one. Dude has a way with words!