i wish a lady would interrupt my narrative with her baseline trust.
Comment on Anon goes to therapy
Sunsofold@lemmings.world 3 weeks ago
I think I can see what went wrong here. The therapist is probably trying to disrupt their internal narrative but hasn’t established the baseline trust. Confrontation can be important in therapy. Sometimes, people can get the idea that their agency doesn’t matter, that they are just the sort of person who doesn’t get to (lose weight/have sex/get that job/etc.) and part of a therapist’s job can be to get the patient to break down that belief by questioning it, but if they haven’t established the necessary trust with the patient, it just comes across like a trollish comment on the internet, a random attack from a stranger who might not only not be doing it for your best interest but even to be hurtful for their own amusement.
TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
Sunsofold@lemmings.world 3 weeks ago
LH0ezVT@sh.itjust.works 3 weeks ago
*thrust
skisnow@lemmy.ca 3 weeks ago
This is the only sensible response I can see in the whole comments section. Lot of replies from people who think a therapist’s job is to cheer you up with a wholesome pep talk and send you on your way.
Sunsofold@lemmings.world 3 weeks ago
Sometimes a pep talk is what you need. Sometimes it’s a harsh reality check. The quality of a therapist is partly determined by their ability to know when one or the other is needed.
RampantParanoia2365@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
The problem is that it’s bad fiction.
pyre@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
it’s green text; it’s more made up than an r/aita and r/tifu post combined.
Sunsofold@lemmings.world 3 weeks ago
Greentext means it was written by an ignorant person, not necessarily that it is false.
fibojoly@sh.itjust.works 3 weeks ago
Yeah the “you didn’t really try” can be super dismissive from a stranger. Or it can be a positive message like “you are stronger than you think” coming from a friend. But I don’t think even coming a friend you’d get that, when you are down the hole.
captainlezbian@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
Yeah, and I think the better way of phrasing such a thing is “you’re defeating yourself before putting in a good external effort.”
I remember being young, a virgin, and struggling to get laid. And yeah I really thought I was trying, but it was more like I was trying to try. I wasn’t chatting people up, I wasn’t going out, I wasn’t socializing much at all, and when someone literally fell into my lap hitting on me I pushed her away. I was dealing with my own mental issues and while I wanted to get into a relationship or even just laid, those issues stood firmly between me and actually trying. Hell, it had turned out I had been hot the whole time.
Bumblpie@sh.itjust.works 3 weeks ago
When you actually try, what goes wrong ?
Icytrees@sh.itjust.works 3 weeks ago
Context and tone is so important in therapy. I had trouble with a new counselor because she was far more challenging than my last one, who was more about building my confidence. She kept pushing, lightly, until I defended myself — saying that suffering isn’t a competition and how I feel is valid — when I realized she was trying to get me to own my emotions when I was almost disassociating. She’s better than I realized.
MortUS@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
And Only time and repetition will be able to tell if it’s in good faith or bad faith.