Plenty of smart parents fuck up while sleep deprived. That’s what made it such a popular tragedy to make PSAs about.
Comment on Baby dies after California mom leaves him in car to get lip filler on 101-degree day, police say
markovs_gun@lemmy.world 19 hours ago
Unfortunately this is a pretty common occurrence. There was a big furor about it about a decade ago with a social media fad called the “hot car challenge” where adults would sit in hot cars turned off in the sun to see how long they could last in them ostensibly to build awareness of the problem, and there were all sorts of helpful tips and design changes made to cars and phones to try to make it more difficult to forget your kids in hot cars. Myself I wonder if any of it had any actual impact because surely the sort of people who leave their kids in hot cars aren’t the smartest and probably don’t keep up with safety PSAs about the issue.
ayyy@sh.itjust.works 16 hours ago
ryathal@sh.itjust.works 16 hours ago
After having kids I totally understand how it can happen by mistake.
cynar@lemmy.world 15 hours ago
As a parent myself, I’m now doubly amazed at how few cases of forgetting happen. It’s so easy to do, and your brain is reduced to blomonge by sleep deprivation.
FYI, the “baby on board” signs aren’t generally meant as “don’t crash into me” signs, but “assume the driver is drunk and distracted” signs. Having been there, I try and give them plenty of space!
EnsignWashout@startrek.website 17 hours ago
The left shoe trick - throwing my shoe in the car next to the kid - probably saved my kid’s life more than once.
The kind of parents who have these tragedies are tired ones. Which is most parents with small children.
victorz@lemmy.world 11 hours ago
I’ve been fucking tired as all hell, but a) I would not be driving a car with my child in it if I was so tired that I would forget I had a child. The fuck? That’s it. There’s no b). I would also fall asleep before I would forget I had a child. I cannot believe people really need a “trick” to help them remember they have a child. I just cannot relate.
Chip_Rat@lemmy.world 8 hours ago
washingtonpost.com/…/8ae0fe3a-f580-11e3-a3a5-42be…
This article is worth a read. I think that anyone who says “I could NEVER…” are the exact people that are playing with fire. I don’t have children, but I still get anxiety thinking about what would happen if I did and any number of variables came up at the wrong moment in time.
This is not an attack on you. This article really helped me understand a situation where it isn’t some irresponsible person just leaving their kids alone for hours to get Botox assuming the car will stay on and cool. Humans are humans, and it’s sickening and devastating to think about how a simple mistake, a hiccup in the brain, could lead to the death of your own child.
victorz@lemmy.world 3 hours ago
I wish I could read it—it’s paywalled. 😞
snowsuit2654@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 hours ago
Great article and one I always share when this argument comes up. It can happen with one simple mistake.
EnsignWashout@startrek.website 7 hours ago
I hope you’re thankful for a lifestyle where you have that option. We should all strive to build a world where everyone does.
victorz@lemmy.world 3 hours ago
I mean, taking the bus should be an option in most cases, or? Maybe I’m inconsiderate right now?
Trainguyrom@reddthat.com 17 hours ago
As a parent myself it always boggles my mind that people can forget that they have kids in the car with them. I’m always in dad mode when I have any kids with me, so I’ve never even come close to forgetting a kid in the car. Forgetting to grab the kid’s backpack for school sure, but forgetting a whole child in the car?
moakley@lemmy.world 8 hours ago
The biggest thing that most of those people have in common is that they think it couldn’t happen to them.
Trainguyrom@reddthat.com 5 hours ago
Before I had kids I would’ve been right there with you, but I am in a completely different mindspace anytime I’m caring for my kids than when I’m not.
When I’m in “dad mode” there’s a significant portion of my attention that’s constantly running through “Are the kids getting into trouble? When did I last see them? When were they last fed/watered/potty breaks? Are we about to pass something that they’ll see and decide they need to go to and therefore cost more time/money than I’ve budgeted for this trip and should I be taking a different route to avoid it? When did I last observe the kids alive, has it been more than 60 seconds I need to check on them again…” And the only way to break out of dad mode is if somebody else has taken over active care/monitoring of the kids or if the kids are both asleep in their beds. It’s a biological state that I seriously did not know was possible, and I simply can’t turn it off.
So when I say I can’t forget my kids in the car, this is what I mean, I’m so actively aware of my kids location and status at all times that I’m the primary caretaker that they can’t even try to wander off in a park or store without my noticing
victorz@lemmy.world 3 hours ago
The thing is, I have two kids, and have heard about hot car deaths for years before having kids, so I make sure it doesn’t happen. I never leave the kids alone in the car on a hot day. They come with. Luckily we have cold weather most of the year so they can sit alone for a few minutes in a cold car, but never during the summer. Like, even before hearing about hot car deaths, I knew from a young age that cars get hot, and it’s just common sense not to leave a child in there, because I wouldn’t want to sit in there myself for any amount of time. Doesn’t matter if the AC is on full blast, that thing might cut out or fail for any reason, and then my kids are goners.
grrgyle@slrpnk.net 13 hours ago
I mean I’ve left the house without my glasses and I’m legally blind without them, so I can understand just how absentminded a human can get.
victorz@lemmy.world 11 hours ago
That’s the thing. We non-absent-minded people cannot relate to how absent-minded people can be. We do not understand.
cynar@lemmy.world 15 hours ago
It depends how often you drive without the kids.
If you don’t always drop the kids off yourself, it’s easy to get half way to work on autopilot before realising you meant to drop them off.
Sleep deprivation is a weird thing.
EnsignWashout@startrek.website 15 hours ago
I felt the same, until I had my first lousy sleeper. After a month of lost sleep, I couldn’t remember my own name sometimes. I read once that sleep deprivation is effectively brain damage, and after that experience, I believe it.