Copythis

@Copythis@lemmy.world

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨oh shit⁩ ⁨⁨5⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Damn, she showed up with that 12x18!

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨What would be a good glue to repair this spatula with that wont he toxic or come undone in a dishwasher?⁩ ⁨⁨7⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  Buy 10 spatulas and get one FREE!!

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Me no speak good⁩ ⁨⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  My friend says I act like this.

  I read a book called “how to win friends and influence people” and it completely changed my life for the better once I started taking the book literally.

  Everybody tends to be selfish and think of themselves (not in a bad way). If you play into this and learn what people are interested in, you instantly become interesting to that person.

  “Hey Ricky, how’s your hot wheels collection! Get any new classics?” True story, different name. That’s just the butcher at the grocery store I frequent. He’ll tell me all about his latest hot wheels collection, and then I get a discount, we both win. I’ve made a friend, and influenced him to give me a deal.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨It's the teats, isn't it⁩ ⁨⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  I did lyft pre-covid and I loved it when people would sit up front.

  I had a 12" sub and I’d let people sync their Bluetooth or request music and bump through town. I made so many temporary friends!

  Good times…

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨How can you drive off a gas station with the hose still connected?⁩ ⁨⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  I was drunk and couldn’t drive, so my wife took me to get more beer. She asked me to put gas in our vehicle so I did because it was cold out. I noticed the pump behind me had the nozzle sitting on the ground which was hilarious to me. I took a snapchat picture and posted it saying “what a dumbass!” then I went inside to get my beer.

  I get back in the truck and I’m having a grand old time showing my wife what the idiot behind us must have done when I hear the “CLUNK”. I was told I turned as white as a ghost. I’d done it. It was my fault.

  I went inside, the cashier knew I was drunk (I was being obnoxious). I was profusely apologized and admitted it was all my fault. She went outside with me, explained it didn’t break and that they can reattach it, BUT there’s a charge.

  The cashier then said to me “get in your truck and get as far away as possible immediately. I didn’t see you, this didn’t happen, and I don’t know what happened to the camera footage. Have a nice night.”

  I hopped in the truck and just told my wife DRIVE. Security came rolling up as we were leaving (by chance).

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Which burn was worse? I'm gonna vote for #11.⁩ ⁨⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  Just wait till you get to #12 /s

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Senior Citizen Sex⁩ ⁨⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  That’s where they get practice 😉

  And don’t get me started on when they remove the dentures!

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Senior Citizen Sex⁩ ⁨⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  Seriously.

  I have to go into nursing homes all the time. The ladies at them are the thirstiest women I’ve ever met.

  …but ya know, a hole is a hole 🤷

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Don't forget to tip your gas station⁩ ⁨⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  It’s $5.99 where I’m at.

  We’re winning!

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Coming soon to cinemas near you⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago⁩:

  I just spit out my water all over!

  He just posted a video to his YouTube channel. He’s back. And it’s more disturbing than before.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨I could totally do that if I wanted...⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago⁩:

  I recently found out an old buddy is a famous YouTuber with 5 million followers.

  My kids were watching him, and I said “that’s weird, we used to hang out in high school!” Their minds were blown. He’s gotta be rolling in the big bucks.