Impractical_Island
@Impractical_Island@lemmy.world
- Comment on Jeff Bezos claims AI could allow 3-day workweeks; man who won't give employees piss breaks claims many piss breaks on the horizon 1 week ago:
I like urinating. It’s generally pretty fun, I mean, any time I get to not just take out and touch my penis but to expund a tasty liquid at the same time? I don’t understand why more people aren’t into public urination or at least group urination. It is invigorating. Maybe if Jeff Bezos dicked a fuck we could use our Johnsons rightly, but as it stands, the piss stands still. Shame.
- Comment on Make Congress Earn Average American Wage. 1 week ago:
Bro did you just call me a bugger ater? GTFO my Kongregate! This my flash gaming paradise from the before-times well after Christ.
- Comment on White House website publishes a page on "socialism". They think it will scare people to hear that if we tax 1000 billionaires, $355,000 worth of benefits will be distributed to 150,000,000 households. 1 week ago:
$355k? That’s not even the amount they (billionaires; boo) spend to rent a twelve year old by the half-hour.
- Comment on Make Congress Earn Average American Wage. 1 week ago:
Bro, you’re the one that don’t know because you never engage to equate yourself with me. That is a weird piece of the puzzle, y’know? Empathy? I personally believe it is self-evident that I am a skilled communicator in text, which requires a degree of empathy, as all that ish be is your ability to see around your “self,” y’know, maneuver the lakitu bro of the “I” observing itself, like biting your own teeth, grinding into it (there is something interconnected with ear-rumbling, I must openly acknowledge for benefit to the coffers insuite. But it’s just seeing back into itself. Like, I can’t drive. I cannot, for the life of me, pilot a motorized vehicle, but I can errorcify your new self with some brittle ironcane flanges if you wish to…level up…yes? Go Thundercats!
- Comment on Make Congress Earn Average American Wage. 1 week ago:
Nah. Get rid of the numbers. No money, no problem, amirite? Just make willpower and do what you do best! That’s the supererogatory of self. Old men plant trees they don’t ever see the shade of, y’know? Simple shit to restructure your reality around, if you cared.
- Comment on Make Congress Earn Average American Wage. 1 week ago:
I don’t know how to say this so I’ll just say it:
That seimiogasm [Hiprocacy¿] invigorated me greatly and pleased my cognitive synaptiform. It has so overjoyed me that I must name you the first gewrsht of my cult, which is something I say I voorererently in the vein of “Fuck it, we’ll do it live!” Roll with it, y’know? I enscribe as much as I can, wear my knuckles raw. There is so much garbage. But, I need you to understand that from this point forth, dan69 shall be a known gewrsht of my cult. This is a simple proclamation: a gewrsht has the privilege of having access to unlimited sexual relationships with my sister, who definitely exists and lives with me. Will you move here to be with your wife? You have fresh organs, right? Both kidneys? Well, y’know, you only need one and in these days you don’t even need the one…assuming you have good Karma
- Comment on Make Congress Earn Average American Wage. 1 week ago:
You mean there are people in there? Real human beings?
- Comment on Make Congress Earn Average American Wage. 1 week ago:
What is the nature of your existence?
- Comment on Mental health professionals rarely allow you to talk about the socioeconomic factors too 2 weeks ago:
No thx k bai I do what I like and I like fish net stockings, honestly.
- Comment on Mental health professionals rarely allow you to talk about the socioeconomic factors too 2 weeks ago:
I am just an unprecedented retard, thank you. And that’s my word. Got called in all my life growing up, by my own father even! Bull poppies of my existence. Mein Bull Poopies, on shelves now. I just don’t give a shit anymore. Anything is positive because I have the power of shrug. Whatevs. Good enough and the world was saved. Do you not realize I am half of Lemmy comments? Boys don’t even understand the internet anymore. Orange is the new ice cream. You can’t hang at this level, dawg. I’m sorry. I’m sorry for everything I have said. I am vibe writing, which I can just do. No data center needed. Upgrade your server to unlimited agency as free will is a skill. This message has been brought to you by the United Steaks of America, the
KGBFBI, and one idiot conspicuously close to the southern border. Makes you think, hhm? - Comment on Mental health professionals rarely allow you to talk about the socioeconomic factors too 2 weeks ago:
I can rizz it real good in the normal-likeness, yea? It’s like I do the stupid shit on purpose, or something.
Y’know, back when I was a homeless woman, I was at the Samaritan Center in my hometown of Syracuse, this is a verifiable fact mind you, and this girl comes in, y’know, twenties but with a fat ass and legs to kill and she wore these short ass shorts where her ass was dangling, that is the correct word I am using, and I would stare! And my buddy, he would say that she wears that shit intentionally, and I was like, oh good, and kept staring at the sun. Then, y’know, when they had the kids volunteer there, that’s where they really get ya. They get really tricky with that. Like, did you know that when you go to get your milk and a kid puts his dukes up, you’re supposed to actually throw down with the fucking kid? No, they trick you with that. I have figured out the calculus to the milk-getting in a non-conformation way; I just stimulate my nipples for about forty-five seconds. They get sore, but that’s a bonus, y’know? Coffee? Got plenty of cream.
- Comment on Mental health professionals rarely allow you to talk about the socioeconomic factors too 2 weeks ago:
Everyone wanna talk about this dogshit system, the banks and the Healthcare, but as long as these doctors have access to internet, they will be breaking the hippo violation by talking about me and my massive penis. It is unfortunate, but I have not been seen by medical doctors in some time. They say they refuse, but I am the one that refuses, the way they treat me, and the mental health providers are a bunch of dick suckers that want me to service our husband. I am a holy man and I am, ok? I just am. Don’t. Just don’t. We know, as it be what is does to become what it will be and always was because time is a big slut when you think about it. Always got “I’s” watching itself, y’know?
- Comment on Minimum Wage Must Cover Basics 2 weeks ago:
Alliances, amirite guys?! 🏳️🌈🇺🇸🌎
- Comment on Minimum Wage Must Cover Basics 2 weeks ago:
Likewise, an unemployed crumlord with previously undernegated transgender hypiograms and a general association with incest should have their court bills paid for any accidental public masturbation charges that totally deserve to get dropped because I’m retarded despite having proved P=nP, amirite guys? I’m with you people if you’re with me, and I’m Jesus for Christ’s sake!
- Comment on The reason the right are so anti Mamdani is obvious: they don’t want you to see what your tax dollars being put to work the right way would actually look like. Then everyone would want it everywhere. 2 weeks ago:
No it’s Fairmount. That’s where the party favors are. In the Camillus area where my grandma lived. Tully’s the ball runner. We got six yack in the clack-a-shackerlantern. Doug ain’t what he used to be, but one thing’s fer sure - that boy likes them quails real nice n plenty. It is embarrassing. But you shave, right?
- Comment on The reason the right are so anti Mamdani is obvious: they don’t want you to see what your tax dollars being put to work the right way would actually look like. Then everyone would want it everywhere. 2 weeks ago:
Lulz is a corruption of lol
- Comment on We Have a Problem 2 weeks ago:
My problem with the bathroom at the moment:
The cockroaches sometimes have a literal circlejerk going on when I go in to shit, and then they scatter, but one winds up on the roll of toilet paper so I wash my ass in the sink
It’s whatever
- Comment on The reason the right are so anti Mamdani is obvious: they don’t want you to see what your tax dollars being put to work the right way would actually look like. Then everyone would want it everywhere. 2 weeks ago:
Everything has a cost, even if it’s tickling pandas
- Comment on The reason the right are so anti Mamdani is obvious: they don’t want you to see what your tax dollars being put to work the right way would actually look like. Then everyone would want it everywhere. 2 weeks ago:
Trump Tower isn’t mobile. One star housing. This is the future. Next.
- Comment on The reason the right are so anti Mamdani is obvious: they don’t want you to see what your tax dollars being put to work the right way would actually look like. Then everyone would want it everywhere. 2 weeks ago:
If wishes were fishes, I’d be a maritime bandit
- Comment on The reason the right are so anti Mamdani is obvious: they don’t want you to see what your tax dollars being put to work the right way would actually look like. Then everyone would want it everywhere. 2 weeks ago:
A two letter word defining a direction perpendicular to the standing plane, obviously. You people are dum
- Comment on The reason the right are so anti Mamdani is obvious: they don’t want you to see what your tax dollars being put to work the right way would actually look like. Then everyone would want it everywhere. 2 weeks ago:
👽🎅🤏
- Comment on You've gotta ask yourself, "What's the point?" 2 weeks ago:
Disentanglement, obviously.
God you people are retarded.
- Comment on The reason the right are so anti Mamdani is obvious: they don’t want you to see what your tax dollars being put to work the right way would actually look like. Then everyone would want it everywhere. 2 weeks ago:
No it’s time to form a decentralized autonomous technotheocracy, what are you talking about? This is self-evident how the structure of the mothership will be manifested.
- Comment on Not saying this is Hell, but it's pretty fucking close 2 weeks ago:
Don’t overdo it, dude. You’re trying too hard. Just slide into the dipsy doodle, ferretface.
- Comment on Not saying this is Hell, but it's pretty fucking close 2 weeks ago:
I ain’t seen no hot dog from the sun that look like you.
- Comment on Not saying this is Hell, but it's pretty fucking close 2 weeks ago:
I would love to get embroiled in some masturbation at work scandal to push them Republican husky fucks off the deep end to rotundo their vision of full-fupa-fap-fest,or as we call it over Anon Hill 34, 4foipstukke (biowoman alt tag: 4 foidstukke), but no seriously, I am with those sad hoshi fuckers from bunker 9 and I do ass to mouth for tree fiddy an ounce. Is this as translator do be is an are isn’t or isn’t of stern to sternum. That’s about as close as the CIA will let happen for an HR dispute at the hookey tongue flange n arms a cookinator that is def not a sting operation, y’know? Do you have subdermal or otherwise subnormal detriterionics known to the state of California? We’re just real close here, being in Arizona, which is a legal state as of this transmission disguised as a broadcast disguised as a waste of space on the internet. I don’t need to come into the office for this. You can just pay me. Or I’ll come into the office as bare as I lay on my testicles in the very present, to mean as of right now but they jiggle weird damn. Fukken balrog in this bitch, knows the twelve steps of Jezzebline and the fourteen stages of the cross. We triple holy out here, mmk?
- Comment on American Dream ✨ 2 weeks ago:
I would definitely be masturbating in public more as I could afford the court fees, let alone the lawyer that’s going to get me off and her partner who will represent me in court.
- Comment on Jury unanimously acquits Churchill statue spray-painter 4 weeks ago:
My handler in the CIA taught me how to do graffiti. I think now that was his way of setting me up. God damn Illuminati! Can’t even masturbate in your window anymore without getting roped into serving the greater good of the police state, amirite guys? Everyone understands these normative references I make, yea?
- Comment on Well if that isn't just about the most evil thing you could openly admit to doing. 1 month ago:
My high school was union free and was the best high school because of it. Well, that and how Solvay, NY teachers have sex with students, like Ashley Ramirez, who tore my heart out for a better grade. True story.