immutable
@immutable@lemm.ee
- Comment on ooo.ooo 1 week ago:
He likely has narcissistic personality disorder and so this is less an act and more a mask, a shield. The person he’s protecting the most is himself, he needs to be this facade.
I found this video really quite fascinating about what it’s like caring for a dying narcissist. Whatever family that remains hold out hope that as death itself nears the narcissist might finally let down their guard and show their true self. Apparently the opposite happens.
- Comment on Are most people here left-wing? 1 week ago:
Neat, I appreciate your insight. Upvote from me and today I learned.
- Comment on I hate my phone so I got rid of it 1 week ago:
Yea this is my problem with this video.
It’s a pretty good video and the creator gets so close to figuring out that he doesn’t hate his phone, he hates social media.
It’s an interesting video from the point of view that it kinda makes this argument over and over.
I thought that doing X without my smartphone would be really inconvenient, it was only mildly inconvenient and I was able to manage it.
He ends up realizing how much happier he is without having the ability to just pull his phone out and go on twitter anytime he is bored. So just delete twitter?
All the benefits of his experiment can be had by just getting rid of social media apps and all the inconveniences can go away.
I really wanted this video to end with him putting those two bits together. But instead he just goes “well back to using a phone and it making me miserable” and as the viewer I’m just thinking “what was the point of all this then?! You learned a lesson, you gained a valuable insight about yourself as a person, and now just nothing. Just ‘cool insight, no need to act on that though’ seriously?!”
- Comment on Are most people here left-wing? 1 week ago:
Yea I tend to think than when someone identifies as a Libertarian they almost certainly don’t mean a civil libertarian, which is how the aclu actually identifies themselves.
We have grown from a roomful of civil libertarians to more than 4 million members, activists, and supporters across the country. The ACLU is now a nationwide organization with a 50-state network of staffed affiliate offices filing cases in both state and federal courts. We appear before the Supreme Court more than any other organization except the Department of Justice.
This is literally the only time the word libertarian appears in their own history www.aclu.org/about/aclu-history
- Comment on Are most people here left-wing? 1 week ago:
Liberal policies are an actual thing, a thing that leftists frequently disagree with.
Libertarians are often placed on the right part of the left-right divide. The fact you’ve chosen the label libertarian instead of conservative is animated by the exact same “purity test” that you find so silly.
- Comment on UAW president: ‘Deplorable’ that Trump stripped union rights for federal workers 2 weeks ago:
Dude is this you too Mr UAW President?
www.freep.com/story/money/cars/…/82686652007/
Maybe you shouldn’t support someone when their policies just happen to accidentally line up with you on occasion.
- Comment on am i responsible if i hurt someone by leaving them after "making" them fall in love with me? 4 weeks ago:
If I were your partner, although it might not feel like it in the moment, the sooner the better.
If you aren’t going to commit to them, that’s your choice to make, but free them up to find someone that will. Every ounce of love and time and attention they pay you from the moment you make the decision to leave until you find the gumption to do it is a waste for them. The most respectful thing you can do is not waste the precious and finite moments of their life.
Let them know what you’ve decided. Have the courage to tell them plainly and honestly that you are leaving and that you won’t be the person to love them. Let them get over you so they can find the person that will love them.
And don’t you dare double back unless you mean to stay. If you stay do it because it’s what you want not because you feel bad. That partner is a human being, one that deserves the truth and to be loved. If you can’t do that, or don’t want to do that, that’s your choice.
This is the least we owe our partners, to be honest with them, to love them or let them find love elsewhere.
I know you are getting a lot of downvotes. Choosing to leave someone you love is not a popular opinion. I could not do it and I think most couldn’t. In time I suspect you will find one of two things to be true.
- You will find someone you truly love and you will recognize that this relationship had affection and care but was different.
- You will find that what was out there wasn’t worth what you gave up, that this was love, and you will wish you had it back
This is life though, the hard decisions, and only you get to make them. I hope you make a good one, and above all, if you want to be a decent human being, treat your partner well. If that means standing by their side in love, great. If that means being honest with them so that they can be happy, also fine. Just don’t lie to them, don’t be needlessly mean in ending it, have the courage of your convictions and tell them the plain simple truth. Don’t make up a reason that feels better, don’t blame them for the relationship falling apart, don’t trick them into hating you.
You owe them that at least.
- Comment on am i responsible if i hurt someone by leaving them after "making" them fall in love with me? 4 weeks ago:
Explain your situation then.
Sounds to me like you love your partner and they love you. You’d like to leave to go have other life experiences.
It’s pretty easy, which do you value more, the love you have for your partner or these life experiences you could have?
I don’t know you, but my guess is that if you are thinking about it enough to want to find an answer, then you already have your answer. You value the life experiences more, you care about your partner, and you don’t want to hurt them.
I’ve been married to my wife for over a decade now, I love her with all my heart, I can’t think of any kind of life experience that would make me want to leave her. I imagine that love is not a binary on or off type thing that there are degrees and kinds of love. It’s very well possible that you love your partner but not enough to want to stay together forever.
This is really a question that only you can answer. Which do you want to do, it’s your one life, you get to choose. But don’t stay with your partner because you are afraid of hurting them because if that’s why you stay, you will become bitter and resentful and the idea of “what could of been” will always be this perfect thing that they kept from you.
Stay because you want to stay or leave because you’d rather leave.
- Comment on am i responsible if i hurt someone by leaving them after "making" them fall in love with me? 4 weeks ago:
In general you can’t be responsible for someone else’s emotions.
If you were having a casual relationship and the other person has big feelings you don’t reciprocate, that sucks but it’s not your fault.
If, however, you reciprocate those feelings, or pretended to and led them on, then you do bear some responsibility.
The actual salient question though is if you love this person that loves you. If not, you aren’t doing them any favors stringing them along. That person deserves to be loved like anyone else and you will be causing them more harm than good if you pretend you love them just to save them some heartbreak.
The correct course of action is to be honest about how you feel and also recognize how your partner feels. Whether or not you intended them to fall in love with you, recognize that that is significant and your loss in their life will be painful. There’s no two ways about that, so be kind and compassionate to your partner.
But do not fool yourself into thinking that what’s right is to just keep them around because you don’t want to break their hearts. If they love you, they want to be loved back, and if you can’t do that that’s fine.
Pretending you love them so you won’t hurt them will cause the greatest pain of all.
- Comment on Why are autistic people so odd?? 4 weeks ago:
I’m neurodivergent, let me take a crack at this.
First off, disclaimer, autism is a massive spectrum so this whole thing is a gross generalization.
Neurodivergent people act differently than neurotypical people for 3 broad categories of reasons
- different stimuli processing
- different thinking patterns
- different skills
First, is stimuli processing. Have you ever been in a crowded room and there’s lots of people talking but your brain does you a cool favor and ignores all that noise so you can focus on the person in front of you? Did you do anything to make that happen, probably not. It’s just a thing your brain did for you when processing all that stimuli, you placed your focus on the speaker in front of you and your brain filtered the rest. What if you couldn’t do that?
Stimuli processing issues can present in both dimensions, both over processing and under processing. Neurodivergent people are often placed into situations that are relatively easy for neurotypical people to process but can be very challenging for neurodivergent people to process. If you want to do a thought experiment (or actual experiment) select a stimuli you can’t ignore, pinch yourself hard every few seconds and try to carry on a conversation. You will notice it takes a lot more energy to focus on your tasks and ignore this unwanted stimuli.
Second, different thinking patterns. We all process the world differently. Neurodivergent people can have very different ways of processing information, I know first hand of three patterns that are common and that I exhibit.
- Perseveration. Perseveration is when you can’t stop thinking about a topic. Kinda like getting a song stuck in your head, but for me it’s having a difficult technical problem and literally being unable to carry out other functions because I can’t keep my brain from working on it. I wake up at 4am thinking about technical problems and then can’t go back to sleep. A puzzle might be a fun diversion for you, it can be a dangerous trap for me where I know my brain will continually turn it over again and again no matter what I want.
- Hyper literal thinking. I think about things in very black and white terms. It can be very frustrating for things to happen outside of the rules I’ve established. There are rules that make obvious sense and the contravention of those rules is distressing. For example, you aren’t supposed to hurt people’s feeling but you also aren’t supposed to lie, this makes white lies distressing (I find all kinds of deception distressing, and it’s amazing how much you are just supposed to lie to people in many social situations).
- Hyper focus. Neurodivergent people often have special interests that they can focus on for extended periods of time. If people were to leave me alone, I could write code for days, only stopping when hunger or some other undeniable physical pain occurs.
Third, different skills. Frequently neurodivergent people find social skills difficult. I said to someone recently that neurotypical people seem completely insane to me. The complex web of contradicting rules make little sense. On top of this, rules are often predicated on being able to ascertain the feelings of the person you are interacting with. Many neurodivergent people find this difficult to impossible.
The best I’ve been able to come up with is it’s like being color blind. I struggle with understanding facial expressions, body language, tone, etc. I also have problem displaying the correct things in kind. To operate in the world, many neurodivergent people adopt a system of “masking” where we learn what we are “supposed to do” and carefully study people and make sure to make our faces look right and make our bodies look correct. This is extremely taxing even if you get it right, so neurodivergent people end up sometimes getting it wrong and also spending a huge amount of energy doing this.
So to sum up. Neurodivergent people are asked to operate in a world that is constantly bombarding us with negative stimuli, spending extra energy trying to understand social signals that come naturally to others but our brains don’t pick up. Following these weird scripts requires a ton of energy and it’s easy to mess it up and then someone wonders “why are autistic people so weird?”
- Comment on Which movie do you feel has the most wasted potential? 1 month ago:
Agreed. I like the film but it feels like two movies stuck together.
One about the vampire society which is really interesting and novel. And another which is just a run of the mill “rebel faction finds the cure and restores humanity story” that you could find in any zombie film.
I sorta get it though because I think it’s a problem a lot of comments in this thread deals with. An interesting world is not an interesting story. You have this cool vampire society, but then what’s the story? I sorta get why it always ends up being the hero’s journey just in a cool world, because otherwise the comments here are “super cool world but nothing happens”
- Comment on [deleted] 2 months ago:
I still remember being taught about how politics is America is a pendulum.
It swings too far to the right and people get pissed and send it leftward. Then it swings too far to the left and people get pissed and send it rightward.
I have waited my entire life for the swing leftward, and I think I identified what broke America.
Let’s say that this pendulum swinging is necessary, we are a pack of goldfish swinging from left to right looking for something good with short short memories. This system can be metastable, you don’t make a ton of progress on anything but you just sorta bounce between the two sides and the status quo sticks around and you don’t slide into madness.
When 9/11 happened and Ws war on terror emerged, I worried that it would break the system. But in 2008, Obama emerged with a progressive message of hope and change. The pendulum I was told about was about to swing left. I had lived through the right swing of Ws time in office, and now I got to see what the left had to offer (which as a leftist was very exciting).
I watched two phenomenons happen concurrently that broke the system.
- Obama captured the leftward energy that should have swung us back to the left and held it solidly in the center / center-right. He ran as a progressive firebrand and then governed from the center / center right. The big hop and change we got was nationwide Romneycare, a program devised by the Heritage Foundation which has done nothing but entrench the powers of the insurance industry into law.
- Racism broke a large part of the voting public away from reality.
Obama wasn’t the first to do this, Clinton’s triangulation strategy was also a democrat governing from the center.
So we have a captured Democratic Party, beholden to the donor class and they capture the periodic leftswing energy and hold it center / center-right. Things fail to get better and the population goes “well fuck the left doesn’t have any answers, let’s swing the pendulum back the other way”
Over time the result is that the Overton window shifts and shifts and shifts until an oligarch is doing nazi salutes and the corporate media is going “oh he probably isnt really doing a nazi thing, he’s just advancing policies that nazis would love and saying things nazis would say and is excited and you know how hard it is to not do a nazi salute when you are excited.”
Our only hope now is that trump doesn’t slowly boil us into fascism and overplays and the people revolt. But Americans have proven to be willing to just take it in the ass rougher and longer than I’d ever imagine.
- Comment on Making America great! 3 months ago:
The best thing everyone can do is just tune out this bullshit.
MAGA is what happens when edge lords grow up. They love laughing at people freaking out over every dumb thing they do.
During the first trump term I watched the news, I got angry at every thing he did, his supporters lapped that outrage up.
This time fuck it. Rename the Gulf of Mexico to trumps bug boy bathtub if you want. Enjoy it MAGA people, enjoy all your epic trolls but I won’t be on the other side getting upset. And then enjoy when the tariffs make your construction business unprofitable. Enjoy when his bungling jacks up prices sky high and you can’t buy bananas anymore because he threatened to nuke the countries that grow them for reasons no one can identify.
This term they can just enjoy the fucking mess they’ve made and I’m not going to give them any satisfaction in getting upset and yelling at the village idiot to not play with fireworks. Go ahead, blow your fucking fingers off dumbass.
- Comment on ugh i wish 4 months ago:
This problem has always bugged me writ large as well. It seems nearly impossible to have any conversation that looks at the bigger picture of things in a complete and nuanced way.
Take for example employment rates. It’s just taken as a given that high employment is the goal. But stop and think about that for a second. In any other part of your life is your goal to completely saturate all time with labor? No, obviously not.
But the goals are set and we must achieve them. More money next quarter than last quarter, it doesn’t matter if every conceivable customer already has a subscription, we must grow. Make the product cheaper to make, charge more, do anything but consider that we might have picked stupid goals.
- Comment on Im flyinf to the USA from england 5 months ago:
USA USA USA
- Comment on Im flyinf to the USA from england 5 months ago:
Quick note on this one
Pedestrians are not expected to look out for traffic, but are not allowed to just cross anywhere. So it balances out.
If you end up driving, pedestrians are not allowed to cross anywhere (although some places like New York have legalized crossing anywhere) but pedestrians always have the right of way. You can’t run people over because they crossed outside a crosswalk.
So if on foot, use crosswalks or you could get a ticket for jaywalking. If in a vehicle, don’t hit pedestrians.
- Comment on Anon takes the horsepill 5 months ago:
White cows make normal milk, brown cows make chocolate milk. That’s just science
- Comment on Commie trek 5 months ago:
I like how none of the points are correct.
At best they could be a critique of the lives of the people that join up to starfleet. Really the only thing that rings true is that, like any military, they have uniforms and you have to follow the orders of the chain of command.
They show tons of citizens of the federation doing whatever the fuck they want. Doing weird science experiments, going to conferences, settling planets, running a vineyard in France, Captain Siskos dad just has a restaurant for the fun of it.
- Comment on Star Citizen Expose Paints a Fairly Bleak Picture: 'There's No Actual Focus on Getting the Game Done' 5 months ago:
Why would you complete a game when you can make a constant stream of income and increase that income stream with announcements and drip feeds.
Look at this madness robertsspaceindustries.com/funding-goals
- Comment on Anon wants a cute girlfriend. 5 months ago:
“Which are looks or an extravagant personality”
Why won’t cure girls date me, I’m ugly AND boring!
It’s so sad that these people clump together and just reinforce each other’s insecurities. Sure if you look like a thumb and only want to regurgitate 4chan memes you aren’t a very desirable partner. But there are tons of guys that are not leading man attractive that have partners. How do they do it?
Do things, when you do the things if there are women there, treat them like the human beings that they are. The more things you do the more stuff you have to talk about, when you find people that like the same stuff you do and you treat them like people, they end up liking you… it’s really that easy.
It is maddening watching so many men gather together to try to unravel the mystery of “treat women as people” and the absolutely bonkers alternatives they will come up with. Did you know that there are fitcels? These are incels that bought the propaganda and decided “I’ll become the Chad” and dedicated themselves to building fit bodies. They still have the “-cel” suffix because for all the effort, all the hours in the gym, all the supplements, all the physical pain, they never realized that women are people.
It’s fucking wild. Maybe the internet was a mistake
- Comment on Anon recommends a cast iron pan 6 months ago:
I bought a $20 cast iron pan at target, I season it like once a year. I just wash it and make sure to dry it, I’m sure this is against the rules. Seems to work fine for me though. I wouldn’t say it’s nonstick but it’s mostly fine.
A $20 Teflon pan would be flaking and unusable, so for $20 it’s a good deal.
- Comment on Anon attends school online 6 months ago:
Oh for sure, I remember anecdotes like that too, but unless the person is still a friend I’m not going to remember who exactly did it.
But that could be a me thing, my wife always tells me I’m bad at remembering details
- Comment on Anon attends school online 6 months ago:
Honestly the teacher laughing was enough, literally no one is going to give a fuck after that.
People need to realize that they are not the main character, if you want something embarrassing you did to go away just don’t bring it up. People aren’t jotting down notes to bring up later, they have full lives of their own, no one in college has time to commit this to memory any more than a funny anecdote and they won’t bother to remember who did it.
- Comment on Stay frosty 6 months ago:
American checking in, this was also how I was taught to pluralize throughout my education.
The usage in the post title seemed correct to me fwiw
- Comment on The state of Facebook Ads 6 months ago:
The heat generated by a dumpster fire would not be good for forging steel.
Forging steel requires a minimum temperature of 900F
This scam ad is also something that if you showed it to anyone that knows anything about metallurgy would get you laughed at.
- Comment on The foorprints... this was premeditated. 8 months ago:
If I can’t take things I see on the internet at face value then I’ll also have to discount your completely unsupported assertion that “someone just slapped a caption on this picture”
- Comment on The foorprints... this was premeditated. 8 months ago:
So did this guy just blast his own legs with shit to own the libs?
Very on brand for the conservative brain trust
- Comment on Need help with pico-8 8 months ago:
Pico8 carts are just a special flavor of png. I would try running it directly or if it won’t run them with the png extension just rename the file from .png -> .p8 without converting and see if that works
Relevant section of the user manual
There are three ways to share carts made in PICO-8: 1. Share the .p8 or .p8.png file directly with other PICO-8 users Type FOLDER to open the current folder in your host operating system.
Although if you are having trouble you might have more luck getting started with the built in SPLORE command
Relevant section of the user manual
This might be easier to get started with since it will all get wired up automatically for you
- Comment on [deleted] 8 months ago:
This is nowhere near the average price
- Comment on Is the Federation "Communist" or Socialist? 8 months ago:
It is interesting to consider that in the vastness of space that something like a single restaurant might be viewed similarly to a glass of water in the US.
Sure the government could come in and declare eminent domain on my glass of water, but it’s value is so low as to be effectively a nonissue.
In a future where there are tons of planets and tons of replicators, perhaps the idea of personal property has just been extended to include things like a restaurant or a vineyard.
If you use the definition that private property is the private ownership over the means of production, it could be reasoned that something like Sisko’s is not necessarily a means of production but more akin to personal property. If someone on earth wants some creole food they can use any number of replicators to produce and enjoy that. Sisko’s and Picard’s vineyard might be similar to how we would look upon historical preservation. Some people could choose to spend their lives making things the old fashioned way because they enjoy it and people enjoy experiencing it.
The economy of Star Trek is interesting, but I think there are plenty of times when the utility of storytelling ends up mucking with the clarity of the message. One example I was just thinking about the other day was the introduction of the borg queen.
I get why it’s nice for there to be a borg queen, she can embody a more nuanced thinking part of the borg collective and the audience can much more readily understand the idea of a queen ruling over her subjects (whether that be like the rulers of humanity or like the queen bee as they sometimes say). But it also kind of sucks. The borg are such a fascinating species, a collective hive mind acting to attain perfection, more a force of nature than any of the other species we encounter.
While the borg queen is a compelling character and is acted wonderfully, I can’t feel a bit sad that it’s so normal and pedestrian. It turns the borg from this almost incomprehensible force into something so regular, a bunch of drones carrying out the will of the queen. While expedient to the storytelling, I like the idea of what the borg are pre-borg-queen more than what they become post-borg-queen.
I think with the economy a similar thing happens in storylines. There are many scenes that make it clear that humanity doesn’t have money anymore, but when you are telling a story and you want to have some stakes and obstacles, money is soooooo useful. Money makes it trivial to have an obstacle, or shit we need some latinum. Money makes it trivial to introduce stakes.
Star Trek had to try to thread this needle of presenting a post scarcity society while also making a dramatic engaging show for people living in a capitalist society. Scarcity is at the heart of a lot of drama, if you can just replicate your way out of every problem it’s not a very interesting show. It also leads to a thing that once you spot it’s hard not to spot, so much of the tension is aided by the “oh no we can’t replicate that” McGuffin. It plays out in a lot of episodes because otherwise every episode would be 5 minutes of “there’s an outbreak of tallarian flu on Corso V, we emailed them the recipe for the medicine and told them to replicate it.” Then the credits roll.