Submitted 4 hours ago by IHatePepRallies@discuss.online to [deleted]
I don’t know, I was looking for Discord servers and I found one for people like me that said “this isn’t a safe space, but it’s a comfortable place.” I don’t use Discord much, is there a difference?
Are “safe spaces” bad? I mean, the only knowledge I have of it is the post as well as other posts I’ve seen with people that tell you to censor literally any little thing because it “triggers their PTSD”.
Safe spaces, in my mind, are ones that are free of any language that could be construed as harmful, whereas a comfortable space is one that is free of any language that any member construes as harmful. Like, as a concrete but contrived example, I would expect a policy like: if anyone is uncomfortable, we’ll enforce that everyone says “person experiencing homelessness,” but until then, we understand that that being policed is uncomfortable and you can feel empathy and still say “homeless person,” so we’re allowing that, even if it is strictly speaking a signal of a safer space.
The definition of spaces as “safe” or “comfortable” is subjective, there may be some who use the terms synonymously but I don’t. There are safe spaces for drug addicts to discuss their experiences of addiction with each other; these spaces frequently deal with extremely uncomfortable topics. They are “safe” in that there are a few precepts that must be agreed upon in order to enter into the conversation, e.g. “There are no leaders; we are all peers” or “No drug addict is unworthy of help” or “Programs or methodologies that demand exclusivity are vulnerable to cultism and their promotion is not permitted here” etc. The idea is to make certain baseline topics axiomatic so the group can focus their conversations more productively than endlessly rehashing the same topic over and over again, which can exhaust and overwhelm members, to the detriment of all. That definition of safety is created by the community and agreed to by its members, and every safe space is free to define safety differently.
Second thought: if someone tells you something is triggering, please take them at their word, even if you privately think they’re being childish or dramatic or whatever. PTSD triggers suck and while there are common patterns, they can often be highly individualistic. If you find someone’s (or some group’s) interaction preferences over-burdensome, just don’t interact with them.
Understandable, I didn’t mean offense. As someone with PTSD, I will keep that in mind
radiofreebc@lemmy.world 4 hours ago
Unless your own mind is a safe space, you will never find one out there in the world.
queerlilhayseed@piefed.blahaj.zone 2 hours ago
This is not my experience at all. My mind is a kaleidoscopic minefield and out there in the world, there are small refuges where I can find help, or at least rest, where I can gain perspective on my own mind and help make sense of it. Books, friends, quiet places in the woods and fields, cups of tea, benches near murals.
If your mind is a safe place I am happy for you. Mine is constantly trying to kill me, and the world and the people in it have helped me stop it, at great effort on both our parts. Those safe places are there because they help people like me live. Which is a pretty cool thing for the world to do, I think.