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Comments

• IWW4@lemmy.zip ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

  Incels are malignant sexist assholes. If you don’t understand how wrong that is, I can’t help you.

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• wesker@lemmy.sdf.org ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

  You asked this yesterday. People gave you answers.

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  • Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

    You would not do well in the movie Groundhog Day.

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    • wesker@lemmy.sdf.org ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

      There’s no need to be rude.

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• LurkingLuddite@piefed.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

  Inceldom is a self-fulfilling prophecy.

  Why do you want to listen to a bunch of whiny losers pretending it’s not their gross attitude and inability to take responsibility for their own lives that makes them undatable?

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• slazer2au@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

  This account and your previous one keep claiming that statistic yet you never provide it which makes people think you blindly accept blatantly sexist anecdotes as facts. Assuming your stats are real, look at the actual data. Who was questioned, where were they questioned, what inherent cultural bias exist in those regions.

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• yenahmik@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

  What stats? Share your sources.

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• Steve@communick.news ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

  Many of the problems they identify are real. But recognizing there is a problem doesn’t mean you know the cause or solution to it. That’s were they are frequently wrong.

  The general incel idea “The world is unfairly rigged against me, so I’m justified in cheating to get what I want.” Is what’s primarily wrong.

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• infinitevalence@discuss.online ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

  Picked for beach volleyball?

  IDK what stats you’re referencing but getting a date is possible.

  First off you have to ditch the misogyny, most women can smell that miles away and will flag it with their friends and community.

  Second, no one owes you anything, relationships take effort and investment from both parties. This means listening, actually carrying and investing time in your partner.

  None of this happens until you leave to the house and do something. Join a rec League, play boardgames at game room, do trivia nights, sing karaoke.

  Tldr if you want to meet women, you have to go out and meet women and you have to not be a misogynist patriarchal smelly s***.

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• crimson_iris@piefed.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

  Are you going to keep posting the same question every day until you get the answers you want to hear?

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• Pika@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

  Clarification: What definition of incel are you using? Are you strictly using the definition as “One who can not find a partner despite wanting to” or are you using a different definition

  If it’s strictly that definition there isn’t anything wrong with it. It’s when someone in that position starts blaming the other parties for their position that makes it become an issue. I.E Racism, sexism, etc

  In my opinion, incels are in a similar boat to furries, just being that designation doesn’t make it wrong, however the actions you do while in that designation do. As a result, the designation as a whole has a black mark.

  It’s completely fair to hate that you can’t find an SO and blame yourself, it isn’t fair to hate that you can’t find an SO and to blame others for it. The only time I would argue the counterpart is fair is if someone is actually smearing your image, but that isn’t what is happening with the incel stereotype. The incel stereotype is blaming others for liking other characteristics (usually ones that you don’t have [and yes that can include self describing yourself as an incel]), which is entitled/extremely selfish as a trait.

  However if your definition is the stereotype definition of incel, and you can’t see whats wrong with the above… I don’t think anything anyone can say here is going to be able to change anything.

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• HubertManne@piefed.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

  I really don’t know much about incel philosophy and I have never encountered statistics about who asian and hispanic women date. It sounds more like sterotyping. White guys like asian chicks. black guys like white chicks. whatever. people are people so….

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• cecilkorik@lemmy.ca ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

  The more miserable you get about it, the less likely you are to “get picked”. The more unfair the world is to you, the angrier you get, the angrier you get, the more unfair the world will become to you. Do you see how this is an endless spiral that doesn’t lead to a good outcome? It can’t lead to a good outcome. Nobody wants to be around an entitled, fragile, angry, miserable, unstable powder-keg of a human being like that.

  The only way you’re going to solve this is by changing yourself and disconnecting from the idea that you’re “owed” fairness. You may argue the world is a bad place because of reasons. You might be right. But how does that help you? You can’t change the world. You can’t fix the world. So are you going to be angry about it, and confirm everything the world is already telling you about yourself?

  Or are you going to move on, ignore what the world says, accept that the world is going to do whatever it does, and learn how to relentlessly be a good person for its own sake, without expectation of reward? If you can do that, there’s a good chance you will eventually find love. It’s not guaranteed, and you have to stop imagining that it is. You don’t have a right to it. Maybe you think you should have a right to it, but you don’t. The sooner you accept that the better off you’ll be, and the better your chances will be. But it’s still only a chance. Life doesn’t have guarantees.

  If you can’t accept that, you’re going to end up on the incel path, and that isn’t going to work out well for you, you’re never going to build a functional relationship on that foundation, but if it makes you feel better right now, maybe all the misery it will lead to in your future is okay. Is that what you want for yourself? Good luck. I hope it feels really good feeling bad for yourself. Because it’s going to be a miserable future for you if feeling sorry for yourself is all you can do about it.

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• dnick@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

  Most groups like this don’t have to be wrong about the data to be wrong about the interpretation. Did you know that on average, a person has one fallopian tube? That most crimes happen when I’ve cream sales are highest?

  Making new friends as an adult and finding a girlfriend when you’re looking for one are two of the hardest things you’ll do in life. Take care of yourself and try finding things that interest you, but get out there and interact. Talk to people with the intention that an interaction is worthwhile even if it’s only in passing. Take some classes to learn something, not to pick a girl to home in on. Probably 90% of relationships people have are accidental or friend of a coworker or someone who noticed you actively involved in something that doesn’t have anything to do with what you’re actually doing.

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• Zwuzelmaus@feddit.org ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

  Take my upvote according to the rules! 😉

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  • ccunning@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

    Are you thinking of the unpopular opinion community?

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