Why is there so much hate against children here?

Submitted ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago⁩ by ⁨SexualPolytope@lemmy.sdf.org⁩ to ⁨[deleted]⁩

It was the same on Reddit, people openly say disturbing things against children. What prompted me to post this is someone saying that babies should be put in overhead bins inside airplanes. Even if they’re joking, this is a disgusting thing to say. I won’t say that about anything else.

Would they say this openly about dogs or cats? I doubt it. If they do, people will be ready with pitchforks.

But no one gives a fuck when it’s said about children? Why is that? I though that the general consensus were that children are cute. Maybe annoying sometimes, but still cute. But with the amount of hate I see about them here, I’m really concerned. Does anyone have any thoughts about it?

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TheKarion@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
Name someone who would rather have a child on an airplane rather than a normal adult

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- redders@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
  I’ve not heard of any planes getting diverted due to drunk and abusive children…
  
  So children have that going for them!
  
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  - Peruvian_Skies@kbin.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
    That's just because we don't let children get drunk.
    
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- notapantsday@feddit.de ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
  Depends on the adult, depends on the child. But my worst experiences on planes have always been with other adults being drunk, taking half of my seat or smelling like two weeks old fermented sweat. And when children are seriously misbehaving, usually once I find out who the parents are, I feel more sorry for the kids than for myself.
  
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- SexualPolytope@lemmy.sdf.org ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
  Even I won’t prefer that. But I won’t say disturbing things like that. I won’t prefer a dog in my house either, but I’m not gonna say fucked up things like this about them.
  
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- kava@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
  Depends on the kid. I’d rather sit next to a well behaved 9 year old on a plane than an overweight person who smells bad. Every time. Hell, I might prefer an annoying 9 year old even.
  
  My last plane right I sat in between a small child who was well behaved and a small old lady. I had so much room to use my laptop, eat the shitty airplane food, etc. The flight before I was in between a tall and heavyset man and an overweight woman and I felt cramped the whole time.
  
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- Nemo@midwest.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
  The parents.
  
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AttackBunny@kbin.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
Ok, probably going to get downvoted, but here we go. I hate children and especially babies. They cause a visceral reaction in me and it’s not good.

Their awful high pitched squeals, their sticky filthy hands, their germ carrying drippy snotty faces, their awful baby talk that doesn’t make sense, their smell (barf), that awful cooing/laugh I could go on forever. Add in the terrifying idea of carrying one of those parasites in my for 9 months and then popping it out, while destroying my body? No fucking thank you.

Add in that if you say you’re childfree people ALWAYS try to convince you that you need one. “Oh when are you and husband having baybeeeeees?” Never. “What!?!?!? Why!?!?!? They are soooooooo pwecous”. “You need to have at least one. They are miracles, and gods gifts.” “Who will take care of you when you’re old, if you don’t have kids. How will you have purpose in your life?” Idk Karen, maybe I have other interests, and hobbies, or volunteer. I’m fully satisfied with my life WITHOUT kids. Of course this doesn’t ever shut people up.

There are very few places on the internet, and really anywhere, where childfree people can actually, openly say how they feel. If you say things like “god won’t someone shut that screaming brat up” in public, best case you get the look of death. More likely a bunch of people chastising you for not being sympathetic to the poor mom, whose REALLY stressed out, obviously.

All of that eventually breed the comments like “I’m going to put the baby in the microwave”. I know I’ve had to resort to it a few times with extra pushy people, who pester me every time they see me about kids. You get macabre enough and everyone eventually stops asking. Plus hyperbole is fun.

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- Cylusthevirus@kbin.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
  "I hate an entire group of human beings based solely on factors mostly out of their control and expect to be respected for this," is certainly an interesting point of view.
  
  By all means stay as far away from kids as possible and never have any. I for one will never pressure you on that front; much the opposite, in fact.
  
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  - AttackBunny@kbin.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
    Thank you for literally proving my point. You realize that people are allowed to dislike things, right? Even if you don't agree with it. You may hate dogs (for instance), that's your prerogative, but others don't get to judge you for it, simply because you know what you do and don't like. So maybe stop being a judgy asshole. I KNOW I don't like kids. Sure some might be ok for like a minute, but they aren't for me. That doesn't mean there is something wrong with me, or I'm trying to be edgy, or I have severe mental health issues, or that I'm an asshole, or that it's an "interesting point of view". It's reality for a LOT of people. I KNOW myself. I know what I do and don't like. I wish more people would realize it about themselves BEFORE they have kids, and hate them.
    
    You are absolutely in the bottom 1% of the minority then. I can count on one hand the amount of people who have said "good for you for knowing yourself" or "right on" or any variation of agreement/acceptance/confirmation when I have unequivocally started I did not want kids. I said it as a kid (like under 10 years old), and was told I'd change my mind. I said it in my teens, and was told that I would meet the right person and change my mind. I said it in my 20s, and I was told I'd change my mind I just had to wait for my biological clock. I said it in my 30s, and I was told my clock would start soon, and I'd change my mind. I've said it in my 40s, and I'm told "it's not too late".
    
    Not everyone likes children, and THAT'S OK.
    
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  - Shalakushka@kbin.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
    Holy shit "I don't want to be around kids" is not the same as "I should be respected for being a racist." What a reach.
    "I don't like peanut butter."
    "Wow, so you hate food based on what it can't control? RACIST"
    
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- TheInsane42@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
  I for one totally agree with you. It took me ages to find a wife that didn’t want kids as well. Ok, she can stand kids, for a short while, but wouldn’t one in the house. I rather stay far away until the kids are about 12 or older. I took a vasectomy when abortion was discussed and rejected. No way I’d have more kids then wanted (0).
  
  I don’t understand why people have to like pups of their own kind at all costs. Of a lot other species I like the offspring, just not my own kind. Could be because I think we are with to many at the moment, at the cost of the rest. Ah well, nature will solve this issue for us.
  
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  - AttackBunny@kbin.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
    Agreed, the amount of guys who told me "I'll marry you, and give you babies in a year" after dating for like 2 weeks, and like it was some goal I had, was ALARMING. I immediately ended all contact with those guys, no matter how much fun they were in the moment. Found husband like 15 years ago, and we are still very happy. MUCH happier than everyone I know with kids, and we own a business together.
    
    Also, nevermind there are how many kids in foster care, that all those baby crazy lunatics refuse to even consider, because ew not my own progeny bullshit. I know it's not easy to adopt, because there is a suitability/means test, but that should say something, shouldn't it?
    
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BettyWhiteInHD@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
I genuinely haven’t seen any of this personally.

Is it possible that you’re just subscribed to bottom of the barrel dipshit meme communities?

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- SexualPolytope@lemmy.sdf.org ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
  May be. It’s not as true as it was in Reddit. And every time I see it, it’s in Memes or some bullshit community. I might need to clean up my subscriptions.
  
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  - BettyWhiteInHD@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
    That’s what it is. I’m looking at your history and it’s basically all meme communities.
    
    Shit in, shit out.
    
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  - Rooki@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
    Your instance is not optimal if you dont want to see such thing.
    
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HonoraryMancunian@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
Valid question, terrible example. The joke’s funny, and pretty tame.

A better example is how so many r/aww commenters would whinge when a human baby was posted, as if somehow only baby animals are cute.

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- totallynotarobot@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
  À lot of those pics were objectively ugly af babies. People seem to have no perspective on their own children, and it ruins one’s eyebleach scrolling.
  
  An “ugly” cat is still awwdorable. An ugly human is not.
  
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  - AttackBunny@kbin.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
    Most human babies look like a sack of potatoes or Elmer Fudd. They aren’t cute. Ever.
    
    I admittedly do not like children, do not find them cute, and don’t want to see them. Plus, I have a HUGE issue with people posting their children on social media sites, when the child can’t give consent. On top of the security issues with posting a pic of your kid, their first name and location (at least in the data if not stated). “Oh look at little Johnnys first trip to the blah blah lake” not cute.
    
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  - platysalty@kbin.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
    I think it's the lack of fur. Fur makes them nice and fluffy so we overlook the fact that they're incredibly dumb.
    
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- SexualPolytope@lemmy.sdf.org ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
  Yeah, that’s a great example. Look no further than the replies to find some offenders.
  
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  - HonoraryMancunian@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
    
    Look no further than the replies to find some offenders.
    
    Agreed
    
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dandroid@dandroid.app ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

I though that the general consensus were that children are cute.

I find children to be the least cute of all the common household pets.

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oldGregg@lemm.ee ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
Serosutly what a terrible joke. You could still hear them screaming from the overhead bin!

They should put them in a kennel with the luggage, clearly.

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- TheDoctorDonna@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
  At least in the pet carry area so they blend in with the howls and screams. And y’know- it’s pressurized. I’m not positive the luggage bin is.
  
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rufus@discuss.tchncs.de ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
I think you’re being trolled here. There is always one person who says something awkward because they’re seeking attention by provoking people and the internet is anonymous.

You not seeing anyone object is probably them following the rule “Don’t feed the trolls.” You should follow that rule, too. Don’t give them the attention they’re so desperate for. If you interact with them, you start enabling them. Just downvote and ignore the trolls.

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- Pandoras_Can_Opener@mander.xyz ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
  And maybe report.
  
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notapantsday@feddit.de ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
I once came across a reddit thread where physical violence against children was seen as a normal and necessary means of parenting. And it was a mature thread in a mainstream subreddit with thousands of responses. This was the consensus and anyone disagreeing was downvoted into oblivion.

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- kava@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
  I don’t believe this. You talk about scaring a kid with a belt or flip flop on reddit and everyone will call you a child abuser. Hell, you play a prank on your dog by jumping out behind a wall and they think you’re an animal abuser and should not have pets.
  
  I personally was raised with the occasional threat of physical discipline. Really I only got hit with the belt maybe 4 or 5 times in total growing up, all before the age of ~10. I don’t really see it as that big of a deal. I probably wouldn’t do it with my kids, but also I don’t think it’s traumatic or damages the kid.
  
  I think there’s a fundamental difference between hitting with the belt on the butt just to scare and then actually hitting the kid in anger with intention to cause pain. I think most non-psychopaths, even boomers, would agree with the first and not the second.
  
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  - Shalakushka@kbin.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
    Every study done shows it's harmful either way, however "fine" you turned out.
    
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  - Peruvian_Skies@kbin.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
    I think there's a clear subjective difference between consciously spanking a child as a form of discipline, as a rational decision and with the absolute minimum force required for it to work, and hitting a child as a form of punishment guided by negative emotions. In the first case, you're doing it to improve the child's life in the long run. In the second, you're just being violent towards someone weaker than you because you're the lowest of the low.
    
    It's like the difference between a tasteful nude photograph meant to highlight the beauty of the human body and porn, or between using dissonance in music to create tension and using it because you're a bad composer. There isn't a set of general, objective rules to distinguish the two, but if you see it, you immediately know which one it is.
    
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PseudoSpock@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
Flying with a baby should cost so much more people stop doing it. It’s often painful for a baby’s ears, anyway. Why risk causing your baby pain?

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- RoyalEngineering@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
  Yeah and my ears.
  
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  - totallynotarobot@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
    And my axe
    
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BraveSirZaphod@kbin.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
People make offensive or disturbing jokes all the time. If you're truly so sensitive that it "really concerns" you, remember that these are strangers on the internet that will only ever have as big an impact on your life as you allow them to. If a community is full of edgy humor you don't like, leave it and find another one.

I'm not saying that to try to call you overly sensitive or anything; there are plenty of topics I wouldn't want to see jokes about either. The beauty of the entire fediverse community model is that you can go wherever people are that share your values and general vibe.

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- angrystego@kbin.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
  I agree wholeheartedly. At the same time I feel with the OP. When you're interested in child related topics, there's no way to escape the child hate. It's very prevalent.
  
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Gerula@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
Iny opinion is because this kind o forums are places where people who don’t like and don’t want to have kids congregate because they are able to express themselves without the peer pressure of the close society they live in.

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marionberrycore@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
I like kids, and want to become a parent. Not because kids are cute - they often aren’t - but to have a family and get to nurture a young person and see them grow up. However, I hate the societal pressure to have kids and the way it pushes people who don’t genuinely want to have kids into parenthood because it’s the default. And it’s often justified with ‘kids are cute’ as if finding kids cute is all it takes to be a parent. So you run into shitty to mediocre parents running around with kids they didn’t want because they were told kids are the fucking meaning of life, but gave up early on because, what do you know, parenting is actually hard. And for a lot of us, those are our parents, grandparents, bosses, friends, or community members, and it’s so frustrating to see that everywhere. It’s really disturbing to be told by shitty parents (like my own mom) that parenthood is the best thing in the world.

As long as it’s not in front of actual kids, I don’t see a problem with jokes like this, and I sometimes find them pretty funny tbh. I’m not interested in giving shitty parents a free pass because kids are cute. It’s not cute when someone doesn’t support their kids or think about their needs, or sees them as a cute accessory instead of a person. I’m with the childfree people on this - usually their hate is not towards the children, but towards shitty parents and towards having kids being seen as the default.

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- angrystego@kbin.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
  I think it is perfectly ok to hate shitty parents. But it seems to me that many people really hate the children, not their parents. Many of them also tend to generalize and hate all children in a simple children-bad manner. I often see people who are not afraid to say they just hate children. I find those people in all groups - some of them are childless, some of them are good parents and some are the shitty ones. It seems to be the popular edgy thing to say.
  
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robert235@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
Outside of social media, I seen people shown their dislike for children. Only on reddit I see people use the term crotch demon.

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