Yeah but if you stop to talk to a random woman thereās a non zero chance that you end up in jail and accused of sexual assault
Comment on The cashier said "hello" instead of "hi" š³
coolie4@lemmy.world āØ10ā© āØhoursā© agoI make a point of stopping random male presenting strangers (Iām cis het male, randomly stopping women to complement them is not a realistic option)
Iām settled down now, but not too long ago I had a lot of great results that started with approaching women on the street. Thereās definitely a specific way to do it, because Iāve seen a lot of wannabe pickup artists completely disrespecting women, and thatās not it.
Women are people too. If you can talk to a random man, you can talk to a random woman. You literally start off exactly the same and only start escalating if they seem like theyāre enjoying the interaction.
Feyr@lemmy.world āØ10ā© āØhoursā© ago
blarghly@lemmy.world āØ7ā© āØhoursā© ago
Please provide an example of an average guy trying to strike up a respectful conversation with a random girl and going to jail for it. Literally any example. Just one.
coolie4@lemmy.world āØ5ā© āØhoursā© ago
And this is kind of the point I was trying to make. The pendulum has swung so far the other direction that the messaging makes many men think they are not allowed to talk to women at all. This just adds to the divisions.
blarghly@lemmy.world āØ3ā© āØhoursā© ago
I certainly agree with you there. I think this is a big part of why young men are increasingly moving to right wing spaces. If you look at right wing messaging towards young men, a lot of it centers around their romantic lives. Why? Because that is their pain point. And the right gives them an achievable, believable path to get what they want: get jacked, get rich, be a leader, talk to a lot of women but ignore negative responses. Then add in some casual misogyny to stroke their bruised egos.
The leftās advice for menās romantic woes, on the other hand, couldnt be less appealing. Donāt do X. Donāt do Y. This is easy, whatās wrong with you? If you donāt have a satisfying romantic life, you must be a misogynistic piece of shit. If women arenāt interested in you, then just accept it.
The effect is that the left tends to only attract the most depressed, self hating, and socially anxious men, while the remainder either check out politically or move to the right.
SirSamuel@lemmy.world āØ8ā© āØhoursā© ago
š¤
a. Did you not read the parenthetical?
b. Not likely, but there are high odds they will be at best uncomfortable and at worst panicked, depending on which flavor of harassment and assault theyāve experienced before
c. Get help, friend. Or at least touch grass. People are people, and women arenāt alien creatures out to get you
d. If this is a troll, well played ^^
ivanafterall@lemmy.world āØ9ā© āØhoursā© ago
No.
WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today āØ6ā© āØhoursā© ago
Itās not 2014, the world is now the Handmaiden tale.
SirSamuel@lemmy.world āØ7ā© āØhoursā© ago
This particular style is kinda confrontational, generally starting with a firm āExcuse me, sirā or āHey Chiefā
Also Iām an obese middle aged balding white guy. Once i get a little older and my beard gets whiter Iāll have a little more leeway. Iām aware of the inherent power differential that exists with some people because of my appearance alone. I donāt obsess over it, Iām just cognizant of it. My goal is to make people, especially people that may not always get a positive reaction from their outward appearance, feel a little better about themselves. But also just everyone, really. I want to be positive
That being said, I was in a Home Depot the other day and passed a woman that had a sweet piece of art worked into her undercut. She had her braids pulled to the opposite side of her head to show it off. As I approached her on my way somewhere else we made eye contact. I took the opportunity to smile big with my eyes and a little with my mouth, tap the side of my head, and say āThatās freakin awesome. Love it!ā The response was immediate, genuine, and super positive. In two seconds I was past her, moving on with my life. It was a good moment. A life made of these is a good life.
So yeah, if the situation is right, Iām an equal opportunity complementer. Iām also happily married, so itās not like itās a ploy. But I have a skin condition that prevents me from wearing a ring most of the time, and, again, Iām aware of the dynamics of my appearance. Anyway, youāre right women are people too, just people that have a 1 in 4 chance of having been abused/assaulted in a way I never have been, by āpeopleā the same gender as me. So Iām cautious of making them uncomfortable while just trying to live their lives
You couldnāt know that from my comment tho, itās all good. Love you and hope you have a great day š