Comment on Discussion Thread đŸ«Ÿ Thursday 9 April 2026

Gibsonhasafluffybutt@aussie.zone ⁚2⁩ ⁚days⁩ ago

Today is 1 year off suboxone, and a few weeks ago, marked 11 years sober.

There’s a couple of things I wanted to say to both get them off my chest, and maybe offer a window into what life is like with a past like mine.

tldr:

It’s been fascinating feeling things properly for the first time as an adult.

Sorry for the novella.

spoiler

So, suboxone is marketed as something that can supress cravings. The part they don’t tell you, is that it numbs your emotions significantly. So for 10 years, I thought that how I felt was normal. But as soon as I stopped taking suboxone, I realised what had been going on. It’s sneaky in a way. It happens so gradually so you don’t notice the slow erosion of the highs and lows of life. The first 3 months were incredible. Making music felt unreal. Really anything to do with music was unreal. Waves and waves of the happy head tingles (I don’t know the proper term). Everything felt amazing, because you know, I could actually feel things again. Socialising, gym, pretty much everything positive was amplified by 10. But that wasn’t going to last forever because the highs have to come with lows. All the things I’d been ignoring, all the things I thought I was ok with hit real hard. Imagine a decade of life experiences condensed into the space of say, 6 months.
It’s overwhelming. I realised that I’d effectively isolated myself from the world, thinking that it was fine and it didn’t bother me because I was content in my little numb bubble. Then came the regrets of the wasted time. Not just about my old life, but the 10 years of the half life I’d been living that were in the rearview mirror. In the last 12 months, I’ve had a couple of significant health scares, work issues, problems with maintaining friendships etc. No cravings even at my lowest. And I know for a fact that if certain things had happened back in my old life, I would have snapped and gone on an insane bender. I’m glad I stopped taking the stuff, don’t get me wrong, I just wish the doctor that was prescribing it had been a lot more upfront about the impact it would have long term. But like I said yesterday, the stats for people who stop taking it are fucking grim, so I’m guessing the medical literature indicates that it’s better that people never stop taking it. I think the reason I’ve succeeded at this whole thing in general, is that I don’t have a safety net, so I have to be my own. In the back of my mind at all times, I know that if I fail, there’s no rescue. ___

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