MeatPilot

@MeatPilot@lemmy.world

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨A daunting realization⁩ ⁨⁨5⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  Oh yeah plants? Eat my ass!/ Wipes ass with toilet paper

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨brain blowing orgasms⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩:

  Just goon forever

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Tribes - Lemmy.World⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩:

  Getting high and playing on modded Tribes servers was a certain form of Zen for me.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Advice on enjoying your life⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩:

  For me “slow mornings” means I get to take my time as I poop, shower, and then enjoy a cup of coffee in absolute silence. Before my day is ruined by my kids fighting or asking me for things.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Eyes⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩:

  “… it’s time to go to distant lands…”

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Even California can't say no to prison slavery.⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Um yeah same… certainly wasn’t “wow what a juicy minion ass”

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨lil chubby bear⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Tartigrades are sith.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨I will take no arguments⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  🎊

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨My wife found this in the archives of the library where she works.⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  I wouldn’t touch that with my bare hands.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨I will take no arguments⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Most of it is in my balls now.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Putting the die in diet⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  I know someone who gets the shits from egg yokes and also coffee on occasion. This diet would work well for them because they’d probably shit themselves inside out after 3 days of this.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Multiverse⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  I know one thing that’s absolutely true about the multiverse!
  
  The multiverse is a convenient excuse to reboot superheroes for a new audience to make money.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨The difference in men vs women priorities⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  God women these days am I right!? Then they have the audacity to ask me my mother’s maiden name and last 4 digits of my social security number.

  Worst is after I give it all to them, they completely ignore the rest of the conversation. Their eyes roll back into their head and start to flitter rapidly. Than their mouths just drop wide open and starts emitting high frequency pitches and tones. Next thing I’m getting texts about unauthorized access to my bank accounts, gosh what an ordeal! I never get to pull out the scale in my pocket to judge their bodies like a pig at the fair.

  So rude, am I right fellas?

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨The wonders of how the human body works⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Hi, dad. When you coming home?

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨I hungereth⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Oi Maaaar! I’m starvin’ me ‘ed orf! So’ me owt some grub, ya git!

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨[deleted]⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  clutching my pearls

  Gracious me, that almost said PUSSY!

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨blast from the past⁩ ⁨⁨4⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Sounds like a kinky night in the bedroom.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Hey my hand was cold⁩ ⁨⁨5⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Don’t yuck someone else’s yum.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Knock on wood⁩ ⁨⁨5⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  That’s not a birch

  Image

  This is a birch.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Vibes based cooking⁩ ⁨⁨5⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  I cook by vibe mostly because I don’t have the items the recipe calls for. So I typically substitute whatever I have that I think fits or smells right. Works well 9/10, just when someone asks me what I used to make something, I have no fucking clue.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨That's why he was called Cringer.⁩ ⁨⁨5⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Enhance 224 to 176.
  Enhance, stop.
  Move in, stop.
  Pull out, track right, stop.
  Center in, pull back.
  Stop.
  Track 45 right.
  Stop.
  Center and stop.
  Enhance 34 to 36.
  Pan right and pull back.
  Stop.
  Enhance 34 to 46.
  Pull back.
  Wait a minute, go right, stop.
  Enhance 57 to 19.
  Track 45 left.
  Stop.
  Enhance 15 to 23.
  Give me a hard copy right there.

  Image

• That's why he was called Cringer.lemmy.world ↗
  Submitted ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago⁩ to ⁨[deleted]⁩ | ⁨10⁩ ⁨comments⁩
• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Looks like a ent to me.⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago⁩:

  Was going to say this wooden post looks like it’s about to drop some life changing advice.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨rule⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago⁩:

  #1 You have nipples.
  #3 You like things inside you.
  #4 You like rubbing or licking things.
  #4 You’ve said “A hole is a hole”.\

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Michigan to clear 400+ acres of state forest for solar farm to meet "clean energy" goals⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago⁩:

  Image

  This Forrest?

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨They did the math⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago⁩:

  Image

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Too dumb to understand where the gas tank opening is⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago⁩:

  The legends say she is still circling the pump to this day.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Ayyy⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago⁩:

  Ain’t ye gonna get yer two bits?

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨My favorite Goya painting⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago⁩:

  Elf in a mouth

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨I guess I'm just a cubicle monkey now⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  If I was alive in the Warhammer 40k universe I’d honestly probably be turned in servo-skull and tasked with far more mundane jobs like following around a Space Marine as a lamp.