krooklochurm
@krooklochurm@lemmy.ca
- Comment on FACTS 14 hours ago:
Nothing gayer than sex between a man and a woman. Gotta eat your bros asshole if you wanna be a tough str8 heteronhero
- Comment on Rush hour traffic in Utrecht, Netherlands 1 day ago:
See what happens when you don’t wear a helmet?
- Comment on The Temporal Loom is unstable, Quick! how will you fix it? 1 day ago:
I’m going to cop a squat and start shumming and not stop until it’s fixed.
- Comment on Heavy is the head that wears the frown 2 days ago:
I’m going to corner it and fuck it in the ass
- Comment on 2 days ago:
Not a bad idea. I’m 90% done my erotic Star Trek the next generation fan fiction. One more graphic sex scene and it’s done. I could finish that.
- Comment on 2 days ago:
I am anxious about nothing and feel the whole range of human emotions, hope for the future, enjoyment of other things. I feel quite happy most of the time actually.
- Comment on 2 days ago:
A person of culture, I see.
I have the time to play games. I own many games. Yet I am not playing them. Why? I used to love games. Why can I not get sucked in anymore?
- Comment on It's happened to me many times 2 days ago:
I went over to a friend from schools for the first time and we rented a game and were playing it and I guess his dad was an alcoholic and he started fighting with his mom and calling her a stupid bitch and I was like: nope. Called my parents and got the fuck out of there.
That alcoholic father? Albert Einstein.
- Comment on This is the type of Q&A that makes the internet so important 2 days ago:
The butt is the dirtiest part of the body so I usually just remove yesterdays towel from my ass and then insert today’s towel right up there while shaking like a dog to air dry
- Comment on Might not be efficient, but at least it... Uhhh, wait, what good does it provide again? 2 days ago:
See, the thing is, I watch piss porn. Hear me out. I told my friend that the thing is, to do piss porn, you kind of have to be into it. You could try and fake it, but it wouldn’t be very convincing. So, my contention is, piss porn is more genuine than other types of porn, because the people partaking are statistically more likely to enjoy doing that type of porn. Which is great, I think, because then they really get into it, which is hot. It’s that enjoyment that gets me off. Their enjoyment.
She said, “Krooklochurm, you’re an idiot. Anyone can fake liking getting pissed in the face.”
So I said, “Well, if you’re so adamant, get in the tub and I’ll piss in your mouth, and let’s see if it’s as easy as you claim.”
So she said, “All right. If I can fist you in the ass afterwards.”
Which I felt was a fair deal, so I took it.
My (formal) position was strengthened significantly by the former event. And I can also attest that I could not convincingly fake enjoying being ass-fisted.
What does that have to do with anything, you ask? Genuinity. The real deal. That’s what.
- Comment on OnLy tWo eLemEnTs 2 days ago:
See!? Witness the surveillance inherent in the system! Help! I’m being surveilled I’m being surveilled!
- Comment on OnLy tWo eLemEnTs 2 days ago:
If you follow the very perfect logic even further you’ll realize that trans people are actually government spying devicez
- Comment on OnLy tWo eLemEnTs 3 days ago:
A well reasoned and thoroughly salient, and logical, addition to my argument.
- Comment on revenge 3 days ago:
Now make his daughter watch while you smash her dad.
- Comment on OnLy tWo eLemEnTs 3 days ago:
Science is for the birds
And birds aren’t real
Since birds aren’t real they are government spying devices
Since birds are government spying devices the government is spying on all of us
Since the government likes watching us they are voyeurs
Some trans people are also voyeurs
Voyeurism is diagnosed using science
Therefore trans people are birds
- Comment on Is lemmy dying? 3 days ago:
I do t think anywhere online features people who are good at picking up on sarcasm.
I think it’s a North American thing. Canadians / Americans are shit at picking up on it irl too
- Comment on SipsTea 3 days ago:
This may be a controversial hot take but I don’t think that’s very good parenting.
- Comment on SipsTea 3 days ago:
But can you read why kids like the sweet taste of Cinnamon Toast Crunch?
- Comment on SipsTea 3 days ago:
You should have fucked the 20 and 19 year olds to establish dominance.
- Comment on This is the type of Q&A that makes the internet so important 3 days ago:
Instead of showering I just roll around in garbage, it fortifies the skin against bees and keeps dangerous people away. It keeps all other kinds of people away too which is a nice bonus.
- Comment on Is lemmy dying? 3 days ago:
I don’t have a problem with that.
The last thing I want is all of the propaganda and barely literate morons that have parasites the rest of the internet coming here to churn it into a fucking cesspool of idiocy.
- Comment on Amazing 3 days ago:
Hoomflember is the daintiest month Breeding cabbages out of dirt farms Broiled sweet and covered with calt
- Comment on Sensory issues 3 days ago:
I’ve got add.
I’m not self diagnosing myself with anything though btw. Just having a laugh.
Actually, I AM diagnosing myself. With krooklochurm disorder. It causes excessive gas and the ability to communicate effortlessly with any real unicorns.
- Comment on Since we're corn posting lately 3 days ago:
Good for them. That warms my cockles.
- Comment on Sensory issues 3 days ago:
SHTART PUNCHING THOSHE KEYSH
- Comment on Sensory issues 4 days ago:
Her mom took Tylenol now she has autism
- Comment on Sensory issues 4 days ago:
I can’t stand tags.
I love certain textures. Anything soft. Some book covers.
I need to wear my socks inside out because the seams drive me insane.
I hate bright lights.
Uh oh
- Comment on The corn spheres gained sapience. Not even God can help us now. 4 days ago:
Porn?
- Comment on Since we're corn posting lately 4 days ago:
Whatever happened to Korn?
- Comment on Corn 4 days ago:
How’d op get a picture of my scrotum?