I and my relationship are proof that if someone is right for you, the quickest pathway to true love is to fucking embarrass yourself. It’s surprisingly human and endearing.
Comment on Anon misses some signals
qyron@sopuli.xyz 4 weeks agoBullshit.
It’s a social - stupid - standing that states romantic/social/sexual advances must be started by the male part, which automatically relegates the female part to a passive/subdued part.
If you want someone, be bold. Doesn’t matter how you define yourself either.
I don’t really care if you are shy and can’t speak or any coping mechanism you may have built to justify your awkwardess. Just try.
Write a note. Have a mutual friend act as a liaison to help the first step. Write a letter. Blurt out the most incoherent speech you can muster. Then say it all again, only ten times slower. Send smoke signals. Use a parrot or a crow. But try.
It hurts a lot more to punish yourself for not trying, later in your life. Failure and rejection are part of it. Get used to it. Learn from it.
Banana@sh.itjust.works 4 weeks ago
MeDuViNoX@sh.itjust.works 4 weeks ago
DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social 4 weeks ago
Hey, slight-less-anons, quick note:
Don’t threaten to rape people when you ask them out. Maybe just leave it at “I likes ya and I wants ya.”
RecluseRamble@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 weeks ago
I didn’t ask for advice, just answered a question. And despite you thinking it’s bullshit, it’s probably the reason, people are not straight-forward.
qyron@sopuli.xyz 4 weeks ago
And I was countering your reply.
So you try, you get turned down. Does it hurt? Yes. Is it the end of the world? If anyone replies with “yes” that is a serious issue because it is not.
Getting a “no” for an answer is almost guaranteed. What is there to lose? Perhaps the lost “yes” for not trying.
RecluseRamble@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 weeks ago
You’re missing the point. You’re trying to solve an emotional problem with logic. Your logic is sound enough but won’t help anyone emotionally hurt.
qyron@sopuli.xyz 4 weeks ago
You’re right on the mark there: I missed the point, a good number of times, which sent me into a downward spiral.
It took a good amount of time and help to aknowledge I was responsible for 90% of my suffering.