Comment on Anon misses some signals
RecluseRamble@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 weeks ago
Why can’t they just say the want to date you?
Because direct rejection hurts. An ignored hint only disappoints.
Comment on Anon misses some signals
RecluseRamble@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 weeks ago
Why can’t they just say the want to date you?
Because direct rejection hurts. An ignored hint only disappoints.
qyron@sopuli.xyz 4 weeks ago
Bullshit.
It’s a social - stupid - standing that states romantic/social/sexual advances must be started by the male part, which automatically relegates the female part to a passive/subdued part.
If you want someone, be bold. Doesn’t matter how you define yourself either.
I don’t really care if you are shy and can’t speak or any coping mechanism you may have built to justify your awkwardess. Just try.
Write a note. Have a mutual friend act as a liaison to help the first step. Write a letter. Blurt out the most incoherent speech you can muster. Then say it all again, only ten times slower. Send smoke signals. Use a parrot or a crow. But try.
It hurts a lot more to punish yourself for not trying, later in your life. Failure and rejection are part of it. Get used to it. Learn from it.
RecluseRamble@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 weeks ago
I didn’t ask for advice, just answered a question. And despite you thinking it’s bullshit, it’s probably the reason, people are not straight-forward.
qyron@sopuli.xyz 4 weeks ago
And I was countering your reply.
So you try, you get turned down. Does it hurt? Yes. Is it the end of the world? If anyone replies with “yes” that is a serious issue because it is not.
Getting a “no” for an answer is almost guaranteed. What is there to lose? Perhaps the lost “yes” for not trying.
RecluseRamble@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 weeks ago
You’re missing the point. You’re trying to solve an emotional problem with logic. Your logic is sound enough but won’t help anyone emotionally hurt.
Banana@sh.itjust.works 4 weeks ago
I and my relationship are proof that if someone is right for you, the quickest pathway to true love is to fucking embarrass yourself. It’s surprisingly human and endearing.
MeDuViNoX@sh.itjust.works 4 weeks ago
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DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social 4 weeks ago
Hey, slight-less-anons, quick note:
Don’t threaten to rape people when you ask them out. Maybe just leave it at “I likes ya and I wants ya.”