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mojofrododojo@lemmy.world ⁨6⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

you don’t think it’s creepy when some 40 year old is dating 18 year olds?

see, I think there are social pressures, verbal and nonverbal cues, mores - whatever you want to call it, that aren’t infantilizing a woman being creeped on by old assholes. they’re expressing a discomfort with something that rarely succeeds and often disrupts normal development.

I’m old. I’ve never seen a 40 year old woman dating an 18 year old man. Ever. I’ve lived in 20+ states and 3 other countries. My experiences aren’t evidence against, but they tell me enough; especially compared to the troves of women I know personally who were catcalled, propositioned, groped and more by men old enough to be their grandfathers, many not even women yet - girls.

So stop worrying about the ‘infantilization’, it’s not a problem compared to the other end of the spectrum, where women and girls are being sexually objectified, groomed and harassed by grown men.

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JackbyDev@programming.dev ⁨6⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

you don’t think it’s creepy when some 40 year old is dating 18 year olds?

The post said 27 and 20.

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- mojofrododojo@lemmy.world ⁨6⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago
  
  I’m just tired of the non stop infantilization of women. Not to mention the only times I really see people commenting on age gaps, they end up being men.
  
  I’m talking to creepy poster above. come on man, in order to follow the thread of the conversation you really need to read them in order otherwise get your notepad out and take notes
  
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  - JackbyDev@programming.dev ⁨6⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago
    The age gap under discussion was 20 and 27, and 18 and 40.
    
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Jax@sh.itjust.works ⁨6⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

especially compared to the troves of women I know personally who were catcalled, propositioned, groped and more by men old enough to be their grandfathers, many not even women yet - girls.

Yeah here’s the problem, an 18 year old woman being with a 40 year old man is nothing like a young woman being sexually harassed by men they don’t know. Trying to conflate the two is ridiculous.

It might be rare. It might be odd to you. You are in no way capable of deciding for either of them what is right for them. Especially considering you, for whatever reason, think being a gold digger is the same as being groomed.,

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- mojofrododojo@lemmy.world ⁨6⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago
  no, it’s creepy and you know it.
  
  this isn’t controversial it’s common, and you know it. trying to reframe it this way is asinine and deluded.
  
  That’s not even addressing all the other harmless ways an 18 year old woman finds herself with a man much older than herself.
  
  pfft sure thing creep
  
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  - Jax@sh.itjust.works ⁨6⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago
    
    no, it’s creepy and you know it.
    
    What a substantive argument, you really put me in my place.
    
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    mojofrododojo@lemmy.world ⁨6⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago
    
    you, for whatever reason, think being a gold digger is the same as being groomed.
    
    it’s genuinely fucking creepy bro. you present a binary: young women with substantially older men are gold diggers, but they can’t be victims of grooming?
    
    definition of fucking creepy
    
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